Let-down & weird emotions

[@llli*FluffyN]

I've searched this site but couldn't find anything that addressed my question. My son is about 2.5 weeks old and every time I nurse him I get this weird feeling of panic and sadness right before I feel the milk let-down. I have been treated in the past for panic-disorder and it almost feels like the start of a panic attack. But it only lasts 5-10 seconds and then subsides. I suspect its some sort of chemical/hormonal thing. Has anyone else experienced this? Is it something that I am going to have to deal with throught my breastfeeding career or will it go away once my hormones settle down post-pregnancy? I am enjoying nursing my sweet little boy, but I really hate this feeling. Everyone has always told me how breastfeeding is supposed to give you a happy, relaxed feeling so I kind of feel like a freak!
Thanks for any insight!

[toriandlukesmom]

Hi. I dont have any experiance with the emotions thing, but maybe I can help a little. For the first several weeks, when I had a let down it was painful and almost itchy. Sometimes it would make my skin crawl ! But now I dont even realize when I have one. So hopefully in time your reaction will pass.

[Erin.Green]

I have also had panic attakcs in the past and my pot-partum period was very difficult. I did not experience what you are going through because I was exlusively pumping for my baby's first month. I remember feeling quite panicked and sad just about all the time. My doc tried a few things, and the one that worked the best was Ativan (an anti-anxiety) that I took when I was feeling out of control with fear. I took it twice a day for probably the first month post partum and then gradually I didn't need it anymore. Have you talked to your doctor? As someone who aslo suffers from panic, I can assure you that the worst will pass.........eventually. Hugs.

[momto2boys]

I didn't necessarily get it during nursing but I did experience a lot of panic and being sad in DS2s early weeks. I went on Zoloft (50 mg) just before 3 mo postpartum and am continuing to take it.

Talk to your OB/GYN or GP and they can help point you in the right direction!

[@llli*trish123]

I too get emotions at letdown, thankfully mine are more like excitement and strong happiness. I never thought too much about it but yes, I do kind of feel like hugging anybody around me and telling them I love them! How funny.

After my son was born I did have pp depression symptoms right away and because I have a history of depression and anxiety my doc suggested I resume Effexor, which I continue to take today at a low dose.

[@llli*amandyg]

I remember getting, not really a panic attack but, a bit of a panicy feeling, at let down and my heart would race for a few beats. After the let down it usually left me feeling happy to be feeding my baby.

I've only had mild depression when I lived in the city for a few years as a teenager. So for me I don't think the panicy feeling had anything to do with depression.

[@llli*djs.mom]

Originalmente publicado por FluffyN

I've searched this site but couldn't find anything that addressed my question. My son is about 2.5 weeks old and every time I nurse him I get this weird feeling of panic and sadness right before I feel the milk let-down. . I suspect its some sort of chemical/hormonal thing. Has anyone else experienced this? Is it something that I am going to have to deal with throught my breastfeeding career or will it go away once my hormones settle down post-pregnancy? I am enjoying nursing my sweet little boy, but I really hate this feeling. Everyone has always told me how breastfeeding is supposed to give you a happy, relaxed feeling so I kind of feel like a freak!
Thanks for any insight!

Hi. I actually did experience this and you'd have to page back through the pages but this is actually the 3rd post of this nature that I've replied too in the last month or so, so know that it has been discussed here very recently, (There are just new posts on these 1st two boards every day!!) In answer to your question, it does pass. And is NOT the kind of postpardum depression that other have mentioned where your full of aniexty and is completely separate from the "baby blues" that most of us experience at some level for the 1st few weeks. Like you I was overcome with both melecholy and axniety (although I had not had episodes with it prior so that was hard for me to recognize and describe when seeking help for it) but it would go away fairly quickly while feeding BUT it would stay with me then entire time I when pumped. It passed completely while feeding at about four months, but it still happens (the anxiety part) if I try to pump mid day. Don't worry about it.
The funny thing was as bad as it was to pump, I still did it every day because, it wasn't as bad as the physical pain associated with beginning latch issues and I had set up boundaries EARLY around needing two hours of ME time a day and making sure my DH had a bottle to feed him during that time was how I got it and felt like I could really take the time. So it was a means to an end! I didn't really become aware of those feelings until I started pumping at 5 weeks. In those early weeks those momentary issues during feeding were drown out by actual latch pain.
I also would like to say trust everything you heard about breastfeeding. But know those rewards are NEVER immediate. It's like everything else worth having. It's not always easy, but ALWAYS worth working for. You will get to a point between 12 & 16 weeks where everything will get much easier. Your body will produce the RIGHT amount, and there will be no pain at all. AND you'll master sidelye nursing AND you'll actually be able to nap with you baby! Can you imagine? I couldn't. ANd then somewhere between 4 & 6 months something will creep up on you about the most intimate bond you've ever had with anybody. And you'll be so proud that you stuck with it. Because women that don't miss this lovely wonderful time. You'll realize it's an intimacy that comes with time and practice and could not have been like this in the beginning even if there had been no problems. Because true intimacy takes time. One of the most wonderful realizations I have had with my son and our BFing attached relationship is that intimacy isn't about sex, it's about unconditional love. So now are my breasts!
So you're not a freak. It's just the beginning. What your feeling is real and is on some level post partum related, but it will pass and you probably won't need medication for it as long as your only feeling it during feeding/pumping!
Congratulations on your LO! Boys are wonderful! HTH.

[@llli*FluffyN]

Thank you, DJ's Mom, for this reply! Its good to know I'm not alone. I really didn't think my issues were PPD since I really feel pretty good the rest of the time. The weird feelings are just associated with feeding. (Well, with let-down which unfortunately is kind of out of control right now and happens all the time - whether I am feeding the baby or not.) Its interesting that you mention pumping. I exclusively pumped for my daughter for 7 months so I'm trying to remember if this type of thing happened back then. If it did it, I probably just chalked it up to how upset I was over all of the problems we had with breastfeeding.
I'm really determined to work through and overcome all of my early breastfeeding problems this time around. I really appreciate everyone's replies and support! Thank you!