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Thread: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

  1. #1

    Default Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    PLEASE HELP ME!!

    I am going through a divorce, my husband left me when my baby was 3 days old... Since then I have been going through a divorce. I have been breastfeeding my baby girl from day 1. My babys father has demanded I pump breast milk so that he can take her for over night/ day visits since she was 1 week old. I have tried to pump my milk but I am under such tremendous amount of stress that I am unable to express my milk. The judge has said that I am unreasonable and that if I don't produce milk within a few weeks then he will allow my child to have formula so that her father can have longer visits with her. I am going crazy! I don't want my child eating formula I am extremely against it and I can't believe that the government can tell me what my baby should eat. Please help me! If you have any advice I would love to hear from you.

    thank you

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    Where are you located? Laws differ state-to-state, country-to-country.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
    and

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    What does your attorney say? I'd definitely look into local laws, that doesn't sound right.
    Mother - Wife - Artist - Cook - Writer - EnvironMENTAList - Cloth Diaperer (but we are soooo done with diapers) - Organic Health Nut...I'm sure there's more.

    DD1 - 12/15/05 Breastfed for 16.5 months
    DD2 - 8/6/07 Breastfed for 3 whole years and 3 little, extra days.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nolamomma View Post
    What does your attorney say? I'd definitely look into local laws, that doesn't sound right.
    I agree. Where are you?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
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    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    So sorry you are going thru this.
    Maybe the following LLL link on divorce and new baby issues will offer some help?
    http://www.llli.org/nb/nbdivorce.html

    State laws vary, so you need to ask your lawyer about this. It wouldn't hurt to go in with your own folder of information. Sadly, our legal system is flawed when it comes to protecting babies from formula. Any way you can speak to your ex and convince him what is best for his child? Sometimes a father will agree to something that is in the best health interest of his own child before a judge who is merely an outsider paid to make decisions for strangers. YKWIM?
    Maybe if you were able to convince him in a non-threatening way, he will agree on his own and you won't have to worry about a judge's ruling.
    You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong no matter who does it or who says it.
    Malcom X

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
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    16

    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    So sorry you're going through all this stress! Could you look into donor milk if it comes down to being forced to give formula?
    Julie
    loving wife to Casey
    proud mama to Caleb 2/05-nursed 3 1/2 years, baby Elijah 4/10-nursing like a champ, and 2 angels we'll meet in heaven!

  7. #7

    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    I am in Michigan

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
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    736

    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    I'm in Michigan as well. If you are nearby, I'd consider donating some milk for you. As it is my boy is not eating his night bottle all that often... instead of leaving it out (we leave the milk out at night since he usually goes 4 hours between feeds at night when he eats, but lately I've been dumping it) I can put it in the fridge / scald it and freeze it. Please pm me if you are interested and maybe we can work things out.
    Momma to K 05/24/07 (due 05/31/07)
    Momma to I, 06/04/10 VBAC'd (due 05/31/10). Read about it here

    Exclusive Pumper to first for 18 months.
    I got my VBAC!

    Struggling with nursing but one way or another breast milk is all they get.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*krystal View Post
    I'm in Michigan as well. If you are nearby, I'd consider donating some milk for you. As it is my boy is not eating his night bottle all that often... instead of leaving it out (we leave the milk out at night since he usually goes 4 hours between feeds at night when he eats, but lately I've been dumping it) I can put it in the fridge / scald it and freeze it. Please pm me if you are interested and maybe we can work things out.


    Wow. What a generous offer. You are a true hero.
    Mother - Wife - Artist - Cook - Writer - EnvironMENTAList - Cloth Diaperer (but we are soooo done with diapers) - Organic Health Nut...I'm sure there's more.

    DD1 - 12/15/05 Breastfed for 16.5 months
    DD2 - 8/6/07 Breastfed for 3 whole years and 3 little, extra days.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
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    175

    Default Re: Judge Threatens to give baby Formula

    Custody & Visitation Issues
    There are only three states that address breastfeeding and custody/visitation in their statutes: Maine, Michigan, and Utah. Maine considers the breastfeeding of a child under the age of one year in its determination of what custody arrangement is in the best interest of the child. Breastfeeding, however, is just one of many factors to be considered. A court in Michigan, when determining parenting time, must take into consideration whether a child younger than six months is breastfed, or if one younger than a year "receives substantial nutrition" by breastfeeding. Utah provides for a minimum visitation schedule for children under the age of five, but "the lack of reasonable alternatives to the needs of a nursing child" may be taken into consideration.

    The lack of a statute does not mean that a judge cannot consider breastfeeding issues in determining visitation or custody. Courts will consider the child's best interests in dealing with family law issues. Additionally, there may be prior court decisions in individual states that recognize the issue of breastfeeding in family law situations. Referring a mother to articles on the LLL Web site (www.lalecheleague.org/Law/LawMain.html) written by Liz Baldwin is a starting point. Area Professional Liaison Leaders may also have information regarding prior court decisions in their states that may be helpful to a mother. The latest American Academy of Pediatrics policy statement on breastfeeding calls on health care professionals to support the efforts of parents and the courts to ensure continuation of breastfeeding in separation and custody proceedings.
    From http://www.llli.org/llleaderweb/lv/lvjunjul05p51.html
    I googled some Michigan laws for you and will continue to do more research tomorrow (if you'd like).
    You're not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can't face reality. Wrong is wrong no matter who does it or who says it.
    Malcom X

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