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Thread: How to deal with Nipple Confusion as a Single Parent

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
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    555

    Default How to deal with Nipple Confusion as a Single Parent

    The thread title says it all. . .but just to refresh, my son is now 16 weeks (I think. . . lol) and hasn't nursed (much) since we moved to Chicago. He gets about 6-8oz of my milk a day from pumping. We try the SNS every night but 8/10 times it doesn't work.

    An LC said that his back-arching/tongue thrusting was nipple confusion (someone at an LLL meeting said he might be hypertonic but I doubt it). I'm not sure what to do- it all seems impossible. I don't get to stay home and only focus on him as I'm by myself.

    Is it to early to try a sippy? Isn't that nipple-y too though?

    Has anyone successfully cup-fed a baby who isn't a newborn (and therefore needs more than 1 oz)?

    How would I deal with this when I fly home next week, where my parents already think I should give up and will be like WTH if I'm doing anything crazy (aka not a bottle)?

    Can we get over this? And would if be ok if we did alternative things just a few feedings a day?

    What on earth am I supposed to do.

    (Sorry I seem to ask for help alot)

    How can I deal with the past guilt from giving him bottles and moving? I feel like now I shouldn't have gone to school here. I just wanted to get a degree from a top school so that I can make more so Connor can have a great life.

    Goodness I have lots of questions. I am hopeful because I am still lactating, but 5 days EBF and since then, varying amounts of BM doesn't seem all that great. It's hard not to compare on here too.

    Thanks so much! I'm doing what I can. I'm just going crazy because I have an exam and a paper due and a baby who won't latch.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    266

    Default Re: How to deal with Nipple Confusion as a Single Parent

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*katia11 View Post

    Has anyone successfully cup-fed a baby who isn't a newborn (and therefore needs more than 1 oz)?

    How would I deal with this when I fly home next week, where my parents already think I should give up and will be like WTH if I'm doing anything crazy (aka not a bottle)?
    First You ARE doing a great job and your little guy is so lucky to have a mama who cares so much.

    I don't have much advice regarding the latch and nipple confusion - at 16 weeks it might just be nipple preference - he might now that he gets milk easier from a bottle....

    No real advice about cup feeding either. But, my little guy is almost 18 weeks and he LOVES drinking out of a cup. He doesn't get many bottles, but about 2 weeks ago showed serious interest in cups. When DH or I drink out of them, he wants it. When I use one in the bath, he desperately wanted it...so I started letting him take sips out of cups - and it works.

    I would think to cup feed at every feeding would be time consuming - but I think you could do it. I notice that when using a plan plastic cup sometimes he jerks it towards his mouth so quick I'm afraid of him getting hurt, so sometimes I fill a bottle nipple up and use that b/c it's squishy plastic.

    I notice at this point he's not sipping, but he is using his tongue to lap it up, so I'm careful not to let him pour any down his throat.

    Also - with regards to going home. I can totally empathize here. My mom thought I should give up at week 2 when I was crying out in pain and she was visiting. Then she thought I should give up at week 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11......from long distance. I went through a lot - mastitis 5 times, severely cracked nipples, baby spitting up blood, thrush, & Raynaud's...and she thought I was crazy to keep going. Even last week, week 17, she said it again when I mentioned I might have yeast overgrowth...and a few days ago I got "I don't know why you don't just give that baby formula at night so he sleeps longer". It is VERY hard to not have support from family, but my approach with my mom has been a simple answer every single time she says it "Because I want to breastfeed him and I am his mother." Once in a while I get flustered and try to back it up with his weight gain stats or about the bond we have....but I found the thing that shuts her up the quickest is the "I am his mother" card. So - just stay strong and let them know that they made parenting decisions when they were raising you and you are entitled to make those same decisions when raising your son.

    Anyway - little one is squealing on his mat...gonna go play with him. But good luck and hang in there - you ARE doing what is best for you and your son...and only YOU can make those decisions.
    Proud mama to Matthew Rory, born naturally 10/29/10, and mama to Callie Elisabeth, born naturally 5/15/12.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    555

    Default Re: How to deal with Nipple Confusion as a Single Parent

    Thanks jenny I really need the support Going crazy!

    We tried a sippy today- he did take it! Took awhile for 2 oz, but he took it. However, I tested it and the flow is faster than his bottles. And he's still sucking on a nipple-like object. Not sure if it'd really be better to switch.

    Will try cup feeding later. . .maybe in the tub!

    Going off what jenny said about him being used to the nipple- is it too late to try and get him back? As much as I love the bonding, if he could nurse long enough to get my supply up to where I can pump more of what he needs, I would be ok.

    And. . (hijacking my own thread) I'm a little concerned. He likes watching me do things, but hasn't shown any interest in cups (or other objects) of mine. Nor does he splash in the tub. He's very alert and attentive though.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
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    Nashvegas-ish
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    324

    Default Re: How to deal with Nipple Confusion as a Single Parent

    Hey Mama! I don't think my little one started splashing in the tub until 8-9 months but I could be wrong.

    As far as nipple confusion / preference . . . I went through this with my DD starting at three months old. There are things you can try to bring your LO back to breast. Do you co-sleep? If so, the best time to introduce the breast to him is when he's barely awake or asleep (known as dream-feeding). That includes before and after naps.

    You can try an SNS (supplemental nursing system) - tape the tube to your breast so that he can drink from the tube as well as stimulate your supply at the same time.

    You can try nursing him in the bathtub - sometimes, surrounded in warm water, your LO will feel "reborn" and try to nurse then.

    Good luck Mama!
    Wife to DH February 17, 2004.
    First time mom to my precious baby girl, welcomed to this world August 3, 2009!
    Birth: 6 lbs. 6 oz. and 18.5"
    6 months: 14 lbs. 14.5 oz. and 26"
    1 year: 20 lbs. and 30"

    Woohoo! We made it one year!


    Learn more about us at my blog.

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