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Thread: Tantrums? 14 months

  1. #31
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
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    Landof2toddlers, Oregon
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    3,113

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    I just sent DH out in the freezing cold to get me a hefeweizen.
    proud but exhausted working mammy to two high needs babies

    • my surprise baby: the one and only D-Man born 3 weeks late (5/5/08) at 9 lbs 14 oz and 21.5 inches, and
    • the shock H-Girl born about a week late (10/7/09) at 8lbs 15oz and 20.75 inches.


    If I am here I am covered in baby (probably two) and fighting for control of the keyboard.

    Family beds are awesome

    Wondering if you have PPD? Take the screening and see your doctor. You deserve to feel better.

  2. #32
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Denver, Co.
    Posts
    1,164

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Omg. You guys are scaring me!!!!!!!!!

    Christine
    Baby Girl Born 2/17/10 to her two mommies
    BF from day one. I looked up one day and realized I'm nursing a toddler!

  3. #33
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    3,331

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    It's a legitimate fear, Christine.

  4. #34
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,983

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mumtothomas View Post
    It's a legitimate fear, Christine.
    But there are compensating benefits. I feel like Joe is a lot easier now than he was at 10 months (he was a velcro baby). He can play by himself a bit. We no longer need locks on every cabinet, because he doesn't pull everything out, etc.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  5. #35
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    17,469

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jbean1979 View Post
    Crap. I thought I was going to have the world's first perfect, charming little toddler boy.

    little demand without being mean? I don't like saying "no" all the time. I don't want his most favorite word ever to be "NO!" kwim? I'd like to figure out how to set some limits without being over the top with rules and such. You've all got that figured out, right?
    You let go of the idea. YOU get used to it. Try it on. Firm is different than mean. Mean is trying to make them pay or trying make them feel bad. Revenge driven. Firm is consistent boundaries met with the same response. Over and over again. And get over not saying no. Because My 5 year old ask me 50 questions a day that the answer is no to just to check. Usually starting with "can I have some candy after breakfast?" NO. "Can I go to school without brushing my teeth?" "Can I watch TV?" Not because the answer will be different today. But because you have to try 50 times to get a yes. Probably. And believe me when I tell you that I pick my battles. I don't say no just to say it. He Jumps on the couch. He just brought inside a cone from the Pinata they broke open at his cousins B-day. It's full of candy. "Can I keep it?" "Yes. Put in the pantry." "Can I have some. I just ate all my breakfast?" "NO!"
    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jbean1979 View Post
    that is super fun. We did that at luch out today, too, yay. It makes you really look forward to your next time out, eh?
    Actually it makes you really investigate Take out near your house. AND Hotels with room service. I want to enjoy my vacations. We eat in our room at that little table. Then we are only bothering our neighbors. And I can't see the judgment on their faces so I am able to enjoy my food.

    Way too lazy for formula

  6. #36
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,983

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Other compensating benefits: You save a crapload of $$$ on restaurants. Homecooked meals and beer bought by the six pack start to look better and better. Going out to eat starts to look like a chore, not a pleasant escape from chores like it used to. It's amazing how having a baby can actually SAVE you money.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  7. #37
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    1,805

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*djs.mom View Post
    You let go of the idea. YOU get used to it. Try it on. Firm is different than mean. Mean is trying to make them pay or trying make them feel bad. Revenge driven. Firm is consistent boundaries met with the same response. Over and over again. And get over not saying no. Because My 5 year old ask me 50 questions a day that the answer is no to just to check. Usually starting with "can I have some candy after breakfast?" NO. "Can I go to school without brushing my teeth?" "Can I watch TV?" Not because the answer will be different today. But because you have to try 50 times to get a yes. Probably. And believe me when I tell you that I pick my battles. I don't say no just to say it. He Jumps on the couch. He just brought inside a cone from the Pinata they broke open at his cousins B-day. It's full of candy. "Can I keep it?" "Yes. Put in the pantry." "Can I have some. I just ate all my breakfast?" "NO!"

    Actually it makes you really investigate Take out near your house. AND Hotels with room service. I want to enjoy my vacations. We eat in our room at that little table. Then we are only bothering our neighbors. And I can't see the judgment on their faces so I am able to enjoy my food.
    These are good points. Obviously I'm not to the stage of verbal interaction, really, so i just feel weird about saying "NO" to things he points at and has little mini meltdowns about, kwim?

    I'm in the middle of no where. We don't get takeout - so that stinks kind fo even more, because these ventures are actually planned and take a good portion of the day. But we like to get out together as a family, otherwise one of is home with him alone non stop for the full day. Like yesterday, I would have been inside with my crazy little monkey all day if we hadn't taken a family trip. And I may have really lost it
    Julia and Maxwell (and Dan and Haddie)
    Maxwell, born January 3, 2010
    A year on Mama's milk and still loving it

  8. #38
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    1,805

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*joe.s.mom View Post
    Other compensating benefits: You save a crapload of $$$ on restaurants. Homecooked meals and beer bought by the six pack start to look better and better. Going out to eat starts to look like a chore, not a pleasant escape from chores like it used to. It's amazing how having a baby can actually SAVE you money.
    We've DEFINITELY noticed this. because we used to go out for dinner and beers about three times a week. Now we go out for lunch MAYBE once a week. Crazy difference!
    Julia and Maxwell (and Dan and Haddie)
    Maxwell, born January 3, 2010
    A year on Mama's milk and still loving it

  9. #39
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Maryland
    Posts
    2,552

    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    I think saying no to a preschooler or school-aged child and a small toddler are totally different though. I say no a lot to DS1, but it is really not productive to say no a million times a day to DS2, because he's still going to scream about it anyway, whereas my 3 year old moves on once we give him a good reason for no (most of the time anyway).
    Beth

    Exclusively pumped for Lance Oct 07
    Nursed until just before he turned 3 Levi Oct 09

    Do you have extra milk? Consider donating!
    http://www.hmbana.org/:

    "So I was welcomed by the consolations of human milk; but it was not my mother or my nurses who made any decision to fill their breasts, but you who through them gave me infant food, in accordance with your ordinance and the riches which are distributed deep in the natural order." -St Augustine

  10. #40
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    Default Re: Tantrums? 14 months

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*Samiha View Post
    I think saying no to a preschooler or school-aged child and a small toddler are totally different though. I say no a lot to DS1, but it is really not productive to say no a million times a day to DS2, because he's still going to scream about it anyway, whereas my 3 year old moves on once we give him a good reason for no (most of the time anyway).
    Yeah it's different. But I think a lot of new moms start out with this idea that saying no is bad or being hesitant to do it or that it's "Mean". And I think if you let go of that idea early you are less likely to beat yourself up when your toddler years don't go the way you dreamed they would.

    Way too lazy for formula

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