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Thread: running on empty please help

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    79

    Unhappy running on empty please help

    Hi,

    My baby is in her crib and has been crying for 3 minutes. I never let her cry but i can't hold her anymore she has been so clinging and needy. When she is alone with me i have to be insight at all times...When i step out of the room she cries...At night it has been a nightmare...she falls asleep at 7 30 waking up at 11 to feed and then at 1 from after the one oclock feeding she wakes up every half hour to hour wanting to feed....she is screaming but i need a minute ...I am exhausted haven't slept in 4 months i had three night where she slept ok...in 4 months i am exhausted...I didn't know where else to turn....my husband works evening shift and i am all alone....have i created a monster by comforting her with the breast where she looks for it...My body hurts from breastfeeding lying down all night...i don't know what to do!!!!
    first time mama to a gassy but adorable baby named Makayla- Wouldn't give up breasfeeding for anything in the world.

    We co-sleep, we love and

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,266

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    Mama:

    How old is your baby? What you describe sounds very normal for a young baby, and unfortunately it's also normal for an older baby. But just because it's normal doesn't mean it's fun. I've been co-sleeping with my second daughter for 9 months now and I'm getting used to having one arm be pins and needles all night long, and routinely waking up with a sore back. One thing that helps me is having a pillow behind my back- I think a lot of back pain comes from having to hold yourself in position all night long, and a pillow can take some of that strain away.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    1,805

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    My DH works second shift too. It's hard. But your baby's schedule sounds so completely normal. Babies RARELY sleep through the night and very frequently wake every hour. My LO woke every hour, I think, until he was about six months old. It's not easy, but it's not uncommon. I just kept reminding myself (with the help of these ladies!) that this time would pass.

    My LO is now 13 months old and I long for those times when all that could soothe him was me. So just try and live in the moment and know that it wont last long, and that a little while from now you'll be craving that special time again.

    ETA: i re read my post and it makes it seem like you should just suck it up and deal with it. Not what I was trying to convey. I was just trying to say that you can do it. It's exhausting, I know. What worked for me best was to try and sleep with the little guy while DH was at work and sleep without a shirt on. At four months, your LO can find his/her way to your breast and you can sleep or at least relax while nursing.
    Last edited by @llli*jbean1979; February 1st, 2011 at 08:03 PM.
    Julia and Maxwell (and Dan and Haddie)
    Maxwell, born January 3, 2010
    A year on Mama's milk and still loving it

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    79

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    She will be five months next week...I am so tired ladies...last night i didn't sleep from 2 to 9 am...until my husband woke up...and i went to sleep for one hour then...I picked her up and she fell asleep again i hope i can get some sleep before the night marathon...she cries when she wants to fart at night and she doesn't sooth herself back to sleep until i hold her again. I only co sleep if necessary cause our mattress is really soft and she is starting to turn...i didn't expect it all to be so tough...so many moms tell me that they give a bottle of formula at night for the child to sleep....i don't know if that,s an option...i really didn't want to that! i want her EBF...i feel better thanks to you ladies...thank you very much! really thank you.
    first time mama to a gassy but adorable baby named Makayla- Wouldn't give up breasfeeding for anything in the world.

    We co-sleep, we love and

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    79

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    @ jebean: NO worries...I didn't take your post as such...I was wondering should i not put the boob in her mouth unless i think she is really hungry...Everything is made worst by the fact that i jsut saw two little white things poking through her lower gums today poor baby....and she is starting to bite my nipples too...too much happening at the same time...
    first time mama to a gassy but adorable baby named Makayla- Wouldn't give up breasfeeding for anything in the world.

    We co-sleep, we love and

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,467

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    Well now at least you know it's teeth. And not anything you did. I vote no on the formula. Babies who teeth are in pain. They get relief from the oxcytocin in your breastmilk. Also are you napping with her during the day when she naps? That IME really really helps. Much more than fixating on all the sleep you didn't get, just grab it where you can. Your chemistry changes once you become a mother. I still think it's good to get 6-8hours in a 24hour period. But those hours don't all have to come together at the same time. It sounds like you get a pretty decent stretch on the front end. Any chance you could lay down with her at 7:30 or maybe at 8pm? And Then also nap with her? When my kid started teething I started napping. I never did it before. But it was really a great idea. And once I started doing it, easy to do. Practice taking naps.

    Way too lazy for formula

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    79

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    @ dj's mom: i always had an issue with sleeping...i am a light and bad sleeper. Through out my teenage years and adulthood if i don't get 8 hours i couldn't function...no parties or clubbing for me ever. I even had to follow sleep therapy. I cannot nap during the day no matter how tired i am i lay down beside her and remain there for 2 hours with my eyes shut and really not sleeping. The only time i get to myhself is at 8 when she is asleep i talk to my family members who are far away and watch 30 minutes of tv to relax then i go to bed and it takes me an hour to fall asleep...everytime she wakes up at night it takes me 30 mins to sleep again...its the strangest thing...so when she wakes up 30 mins later i had like no sleep....i have to try to figure this out...when will this get better who knows? i do not think that the formula is the answer either...specially that she has a sensitive tummhy and is really gassy it might make things worst.
    first time mama to a gassy but adorable baby named Makayla- Wouldn't give up breasfeeding for anything in the world.

    We co-sleep, we love and

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Sunny Arizona
    Posts
    3,171

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    I am a super light sleeper too. It takes me 30-45 mins to fall asleep no matter how tired I am. I totally feel your pain. Have you tried Hylands Teething tablets? They are all natural and help some kids sleep better with the teething pain. You can find them most places that sell anything baby. Target, Walmart, grocery stores etc etc. Does she respond to tylenol? Teething sucks. It's just plain hard on everyone. But this too shall pass.

    I agree formula won't help. She is looking for something soothing to help with the pain. Nursing does that. Does she take a pacifier? I know some kids will accept one to help with teething also. Keep trying until you find something that works.

    Oh and if she's always been gassy it may be something you're eating, but that is way off topic. Let me know if you want to talk more about that.

    Amy married to my bestfriend since 10/30/04

    Proud SAHM to DS born 2/17/07 and DD born 9/11/08 Both weaned together 11/2011
    Currently milk, peach, peanut and tree nut free. DD has outgrown her wheat, cheese, egg, garlic, and citrus allergies

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    17,467

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*feedingmama27 View Post
    @ dj's mom: i always had an issue with sleeping...i am a light and bad sleeper. Through out my teenage years and adulthood if i don't get 8 hours i couldn't function...no parties or clubbing for me ever. I even had to follow sleep therapy. I cannot nap during the day no matter how tired i am i lay down beside her and remain there for 2 hours with my eyes shut and really not sleeping. The only time i get to myhself is at 8 when she is asleep i talk to my family members who are far away and watch 30 minutes of tv to relax then i go to bed and it takes me an hour to fall asleep...everytime she wakes up at night it takes me 30 mins to sleep again...its the strangest thing...so when she wakes up 30 mins later i had like no sleep....i have to try to figure this out...when will this get better who knows? i do not think that the formula is the answer either...specially that she has a sensitive tummhy and is really gassy it might make things worst.
    I get that. And I was like this before I had a kid. Not like I couldn't function. I was out in my 20;s for sure. BUT if I couldn't at least get 4 in a row I'd just stay up. Because it was easier on my body.
    I also get what you are saying about your only alone time. And lots of people don't want to give it up. But is watching a little TV more important than sleeping? Only YOU can decide that. But I think maybe you should try it. Call your family on the weekends when your DH is there to help you. And in terms of sleep, it all WILL CHANGE. Every 4-6 weeks. So try not to get used to anything. But if getting sleep is important to you I am just saying there is more than one way to skin this particular cat.

    Way too lazy for formula

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Denver, Co.
    Posts
    1,164

    Default Re: running on empty please help

    Are you open to giving her Tyelenol and/or gas meds? DD was gassy like that. Baby yoga poses can help too - like bicycling her legs to help work out the gas.

    Christine
    Baby Girl Born 2/17/10 to her two mommies
    BF from day one. I looked up one day and realized I'm nursing a toddler!

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