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Thread: Arrgh!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    132

    Default Arrgh!

    So why does it seem like everyone wants to know when you will wean? It's so annoying. It's nobody's business and to force weaning on a child seems so heartbreaking. It's not like a magic switch turns off at one and they don't want to nurse anymore, ya know? DS drinks some water from his cup but put milk in it and boy he gets mad.

    Just needed to vent. He's such a happy nurser and I wish peeps would just be encouraging. It's a gift for crying out loud. Sheeesh!
    SAHM to my sweet December baby boy.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Northern Cal.
    Posts
    4,984

    Default Re: Arrgh!

    I hear ya, sister! I suggest learning to shrug, nod, smile, and ignore! I have no idea why longer term breastfeeding bugs some people so much, but I try to lead by example, rather than preach, you know? So if anyone asks, I try not to get defensive. I just say, "I love breastfeeding. It's great. I plan to keep doing it as long as it's wonderful for both of us." That kind of honesty is very disarming. Also, humor! It's good to be able to laugh about the harder aspects of breastfeeding (your kid has his hand down your shirt and is squawking in public while groping you, for example). But never give anyone the impression that you are actually looking for their input into your breastfeeding relationship. They can talk, but you're not listening. You can be friendly while also making it clear: it's simply not their decision to make.


    You can call me JoMo!

    Mom to baby boy Joe, born 5/4/09 and breastfed for more than two and a half years, and baby girl Maggie, born 7/9/12.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Arrgh!

    it does get easier as they get older..
    after about 2 my mil quit asking about it, After 3 my husband quit asking
    and when she weaned at 4 nobody figured she was anymore.


    IT was something private between me and her.
    hang in there.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    30

    Default Re: Arrgh!

    DS turns one in two more days and it seems like everyone in the family thinks I'll be weaning him. I look at him and still see a "baby". He doesn't know that he's turning one and that breastfeeding "should" stop just because society is uncomfortable with it. He knows it as nourishment, comfort and LOVE...why would he want to give it up...why would I, as his mother, want to take that away from him? I was surprised that my mom was pressuring me to stop way back at six months. It became so uncomfortable that we don't talk about it with one another anymore. I find it sad that women who are doing their best to provide their children the best there is, are made to feel ashamed for doing what nature intended with our breasts.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    421

    Default Re: Arrgh!

    It definitely is annoying, but I do think most people ask without malicious intent. It seems to me that people who are ignorant about breastfeeding are actually treating the subject of weaning as a sort of hurdle that every mom has to face. There is often sympathy or a feeling of commiseration, like, "Hang in there, you'll get the little leach off your chest, soon enough." There also seems to be a misconception that the longer you wait, the deeper ingrained this "bad habit" becomes, and the harder it is to break the child of this habit--hence, the sense of urgency to wean.

    Then there are the worried ones, who I think weaned their own children early and feel like that's the "right" thing to do.

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