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Thread: All kinds of worries.

  1. #1

    Default All kinds of worries.

    My DD is going to turn a year old next week! After dealing with two bouts of thrush and other complications, she nurses like a champ.

    There's a problem, though. My DD went for her birthday check up, and it turns out that she has mild anemia. I knew we were WAY behind with giving her solids, but it still came as a bit of shock.

    We weren't purposefully delaying solids, but I think we just offered her fewer foods because she didn't seem interested (my ignorance) and my husband and I were/are just so exhausted. I thought iron fortified cereal and some fruits would be fine.

    We both work full-time, we have no family, and my daughter is up at least eight times a night! We don't want to CIO, and my husband has always been against co-sleeping, so we will be talking to a sleep consultant later this month.

    In the meantime, though, I feel so overwhelmed. I feel incredibly guilty about the potential effects of anemia/sleep deprivation on her cognitive development, not to mention the effects of having two parents who are zombies. My DH and I constantly bicker now and I sometimes wish he'd go away. I question why I tried to parent this way, when maybe my daughter would have been better off the traditional formula/CIO parenting style.

    I don't know how I'm going to get her the nutrition she needs when I can barely function (she is on a supplement--which she hasn't been able to take the last week because of a stomach bug).

    Not sure if this is even a question or just a chance for me to vent. I was thinking about taking a week of vacation, the last of my vacation, to do some kind of food boot-camp and sleep during the days while she is at day care. Would this even work?

    Thanks for listening.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
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    239

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    I wouldn't feel guilty about mild anemia. From what I was just reading on UNICEF UKs site about waiting to 6 months to start solids, lots of things can contribute to anemia. For example, they point out that adding a lot of low-iron solids like vegetable purees can increase the chances of anemia, since they are displacing higher-iron breastmilk. And apparently early cord clamping can contribute. Plus, the iron supplement should take care of it.

    DS is finally more interested in eating at 12 months. We've been offering, he just only recently really wanted to eat much.

    Sleep issues stink. No two ways about it. DS despises sleep, so I don't know what to tell you about that.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    8,591

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    Sleep deprivation makes things hard, but I certainly wouldn't blame yourself for the mild anemia. I would look for ways to improve it, but looking backwards isn't really helpful, kwim?

    None of mine really wanted much to do with eating a lot anyway, until after they were 10 months. Both my girls like to play with food a lot and we have days when they take in a lot, but for the most part, I didn't see any reason to hurry anything along. You can look at some iron rich foods now, though and feed those.

    And nightwaking is common, but there are gentle methods of getting her to sleep more at night. Its also not going to harm her in the long run. None of mine slept worth a crap until they were almost 2.

    I will caution you about talking to a "sleep expert". Follow your instincts and be gentle, whatever you decide. Your baby may be a baby, but she's still human, kwim?

    Erin
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    I will caution you about talking to a "sleep expert". Follow your instincts and be gentle, whatever you decide. Your baby may be a baby, but she's still human, kwim?

    wss....
    don't let your hubby come then if it goes bad you can just tell him that and

    dr sears has good info on his web site about improving iron,
    and it's something that is most of the time simple and quickly beter.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    18,063

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    I wanted to add too that weaning doesn't mean that they are magicly going to sleep!

    Hang in there!

  6. #6

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    Here's a link for the Dr. Sears article that Andrea mentioned:

    Family Nutrition: Pumping Up Your Iron

    The link should take you to the section about anemia in babies.

    If you can take a few days to get some sleep while your daughter is at day care, by all means! That sounds like a good idea to me. I don't think you need to worry about your DD being impaired by sleep deprivation though. It's pretty normal for babies that age to still wake frequently. It's not as hard on her as it is on you.
    Karen
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  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    my DD also has mild anemia, I am not shocked cuase I am always mildly anemic too! Anyhow, I give her suppliments and that takes care of it!
    Mommy of 4,
    3 who I watch over, 1 who watches over all of us

    J- 8/20/05 pumped breastmilk for 11 months due to his cleft lip and palate!

    M- 10/17/07 my precious baby lives forever in her mommys heart

    M- 3/31/09 my special gift, she helps heal her mommy and daddys heart. Nursed for 4 years and 10 days, self weaned the day her baby brother was born!

    E-, new little miracle born 4/11/13, my BIG baby! Born 8.6 at 38 weeks. At 9 weeks nearly 17lbs, at 12 weeks nearly 20lbs, at 6 months nearly 23lbs, at 8 months nearly 25lbs and all from BREASTMILK


  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    DD had anemia too, and were prescribed an iron supplement (The only way *I* would take that is if were life and death). Anyhow, I gave DD (who is a picky eater) more snacks/finger foods high in iron and I started giving her Cream of Wheat w/soy milk, w/wheat germ, and wheat bread (in pieces).
    As far as the sleep situation, that's a rough one, one which we are currently trying to deal with as well. We are weaning but it hasn't gotten any easier. DD will sleep well when she feels like it IMO, CIO does more harm than good in the long run on their emotional & psychological development, in the short run might make them act out negatively on a daily basis. If your hubby is against co-sleeping maybe have him get up with your LO (every other night, etc) to make it more appealing Or, you go sleep in your LOs room so that at least YOU and LO are getting enough sleep. Sleep deprivation can take it's toll on many aspects!
    I agree w/pp about being cautious w/a sleep "expert". They teach general methods/techniques, but every individual is different and requires different attention and will/will not respond differently. Follow your mama instincts. Only YOU know your child. There are several gentle techniques out there to help change a child's sleep pattern. Still, there are no guarantees except one: Your child will sleep better, or STTN, when THEY learn how to, or chose to, ON THEIR OWN, in THEIR own way, at THEIR own time. Kind of like a milestone, KWIM? This is something we're learning/realizing as we've been trying to get DDto sleep in her room, in her crib, etc. DD is almost 20mths, and we've been "working" on this since she was 7mths...
    There will be good days and bad days, good nights and bad nights, just know that this eventually will pass.
    I'm a SAHM to
    #1 Alyssa 5/26/09 BF for exactly 25 1/2mths
    #2 Emily 11/7/11 completely self-weaned at 20 mths
    #3 Victoria 12/16/13

    New sights, new goals, new directions...

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    142

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    I just wanted to be another momma to say that you should never regret raising your daughter the way you do. There is so much your daughter gets from you during those nursing sessions and it is way more than food.
    I would second getting a mattress to snooze on in your baby's room. If everyone was sleeping well with your current sleeping situation, I wouldn't say to change anything. I am just thinking you and your baby may be able to sleep more if you spent sometime in the same bed. I have watched my son open his eyes in a panic, but then reach out, touch me or look at me, then he goes right back to sleep. If he had been alone in bed, he would have fully woken. Just a thought.
    I hope you are able to find a good solution.
    Married 9/17/2005
    Mother to Seamus born 3/9/2010 7lbs 9oz Still nursing with no end in sight!
    I love , , cloth diapers! with #2! Due 4/5/2012. for a Vbac!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    18

    Default Re: All kinds of worries.

    I agree with the other posters when they said to try to get DH to get up with baby at night!! . He might get a new perspective on co sleeping! Not only will you sleep with better and more with baby next to you but he probably will too. I know my boyfriend though our DD slept all night, but he just slept thru all her little wake ups.

    Good luck follow your instincts, don't second guess yourself

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