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Thread: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

  1. #1

    Default New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    I have three kids...just had the third a week ago. This is the first time I have stuck to breastfeeding longer than 3 days. I have made it to day 8 and I'm about to give up again :-( I don't want to though. Feeding is frustrating! He sleeps ALOT. Lastnight he slepts 5 hours straight before wanting to feed. Then he fell asleep after feeding for only 20 minutes and I couldn't get him to stay awake. I'm so worried about his weight gain which he isn't gaining like the Dr. wants and the Dr. is concerned too. Why does he sleep so much?? And why can't I get him to stay awake long enough to get what he needs? I have tried tickling, rubbing, talking to him...nothing works.
    Also, why does my milk look clear or barely white? At first it was white but after a day it turned. Is this bad?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    18,063

    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    8 days is so young, hang in there!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    18,063

    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    this link might be helpful

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/normal/newborn-nursing.html


    Frequent nursing encourages good milk supply and reduces engorgement. Aim for nursing at least 10 - 12 times per day (24 hours). You CAN'T nurse too often--you CAN nurse too little.

    Nurse at the first signs of hunger (stirring, rooting, hands in mouth)--don't wait until baby is crying. Allow baby unlimited time at the breast when sucking actively, then offer the second breast. Some newborns are excessively sleepy at first--wake baby to nurse if 2 hours (during the day) or 4 hours (at night) have passed without nursing.

    Is baby getting enough milk?

    Weight gain: Normal newborns may lose up to 7% of birth weight in the first few days. After mom's milk comes in, the average breastfed baby gains 6 oz/week (170 g/week). Take baby for a weight check at the end of the first week or beginning of the second week. Consult with baby's doctor and your lactation consultant if baby is not gaining as expected.

    Dirty diapers: In the early days, baby typically has one dirty diaper for each day of life (1 on day one, 2 on day two...). After day 4, stools should be yellow and baby should have at least 3-4 stools daily that are the size of a US quarter (2.5 cm) or larger. Some babies stool every time they nurse, or even more often--this is normal, too. The normal stool of a breastfed baby is loose (soft to runny) and may be seedy or curdy.

    Wet diapers: In the early days, baby typically has one wet diaper for each day of life (1 on day one, 2 on day two...). Once mom's milk comes in, expect 5-6+ wet diapers every 24 hours. To feel what a sufficiently wet diaper is like, pour 3 tablespoons (45 mL) of water into a clean diaper. A piece of tissue in a disposable diaper will help you determine if the diaper is wet.

    Breast changes

    Your milk should start to "come in" (increase in quantity and change from colostrum to mature milk) between days 2 and 5. To minimize engorgement: nurse often, don’t skip feedings (even at night), ensure good latch/positioning, and let baby finish the first breast before offering the other side. To decrease discomfort from engorgement, use cold and/or cabbage leaf compresses between feedings. If baby is having trouble latching due to engorgement, use reverse pressure softening or express milk until the nipple is soft, then try latching again.

    Call your doctor, midwife and/or lactation consultant if:

    •Baby is having no wet or dirty diapers
    •Baby has dark colored urine after day 3
    (should be pale yellow to clear)
    •Baby has dark colored stools after day 4
    (should be mustard yellow, with no meconium)
    •Baby has fewer wet/soiled diapers or nurses less
    frequently than the goals listed here
    •Mom has symptoms of mastitis
    (sore breast with fever, chills, flu-like aching)

  4. #4
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    Jan 2006
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  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    Welcome and congratulations on the new baby! It's totally normal to feel extremely frustrated when your baby is still so young and there's still so much to figure out. But if you can stick with it, it gets so much better! (You've had 2 other kids- even when you formula-feed there's a lot that makes you in the early days, right?)

    He sleeps ALOT. Lastnight he slepts 5 hours straight before wanting to feed. Then he fell asleep after feeding for only 20 minutes and I couldn't get him to stay awake.
    Newborn babies tend to be pretty sleepy. As long as the baby isn't jaundiced, sleepiness isn't necessarily a cause for concern. Just try to wake the baby and feed every 2-3 hours. You're not always going to be successful but it pays to try. And follow those links from Andrea on waking sleepy babies- they're good ones.

    I'm so worried about his weight gain which he isn't gaining like the Dr. wants and the Dr. is concerned too.
    Can you tell us the following:
    1. How much did your baby weigh at birth?
    2. How much has he weighed at each check-up since then?
    3. Has he always been weighed naked, using the same scale?
    4. Did you have IV fluids during birth?
    5. How many wet and poopy diapers does your baby have in a 24 hour period?
    6. What color are your baby's poops? (Don't be afraid to be descriptive- you can't gross us out!)
    7. How is nursing going, aside from the sleepiness? Are you at all uncomfortable, sore, cracked, etc.?

    The answers to those questions will help us evaluate whether or not there's really reason to be concerned about your baby's weight gain. Remember, it is normal for a newborn to lose up to 10% of birth weight, and to not regain birth weight until 2 weeks of age.

    Also, why does my milk look clear or barely white? At first it was white but after a day it turned. Is this bad?
    It is normal to see a lot of color change in your milk, especially in the early days as your milk changes over from colostrum (which is golden yellow and clear) to true milk (which is varying shades of white).

    The clear, barely white stuff you're seeing is milk. When milk is expressed from the breast, the first milk to come out is watery, relatively low in fat, and thirst-quenching. Often this is referred to as "foremilk." As the feeding progresses, the fat content of the milk gradually increases and the milk changes from clear and watery-looking to whiter and more creamy-looking. This creamy milk is generally called "hindmilk." If you express a few drops at the end of a feeding, you are likely to see milk that looks more like what you expect. Both foremilk and hindmilk are normal variations of human milk- remember, what you produce isn't pasteurized and homogenized like the milk you buy at the store!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    16

    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    I'm with you on the frustration my son is almost 3 weeks old and YES it is very very hard! There are times when I just cry! BUT just know that it is the BEST THING for the both of you! Don't give up at least not this soon.. Is your baby jaundice? If so that could be the cause for all the sleeping, which if that is the case he needs for nurse more! Don't let the baby go more the 3 hours without nursing.. Wake Him/her (sorry can't remember if you said it was a boy or girl) up change his/her diaper that usually works for me, even if it doesnt need to be changed.. When feeding take all the babies clothes off and your shirt, skin to skin helps A LOT... Also keep a baby wipe near by and when the baby starts to nods off use it on his/her hands, face, feet, it usually wakes them up... also when i was in the hospital the lactation consultant told me that it may appear as though the baby is sleeping but sometimes they really are not, pull on his/her arm and if there is tension they are awake.. if it just kinda flops they are probably sleeping.. hang in there momma I KNOW ITS HARD!! I think i'd rather be in your position then mine, a baby that nurses 24/7 ...

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    35

    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    OH please dont give up !! I was in your shoes one year ago and am still nursing my son now!! I never looked further ahead then one day at a time. I figured -if I can make it through one more day and here I am 12 months later and i work full time. You can do it - I hope you have a good support system- this forum helped me so much, I remember being online here on christmas day last year-LOL!! if you can find a new mom/ breastfeeding support group via the hospital you had your child in that helps too- it did for me. Regardless, no matter what you do your love is most imp so if breastfeeding does not work out its ok too and dont feel bad on yourself . Everyone makes you think it is so easy and natural and its probally the hardest thingI have ever had to do. So stick it out the best you can and find good support system and in the end - what ever you do its ok...

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    15

    Default Re: New to this & about to throw in the towel!

    It's not bad that your milk changes consistency. This is the amazing thing about breastmilk. It changes to meet your baby's needs.

    As to the feeding and your baby falling asleep thing, when are you feeding your baby-- are you feeding him right after he wakes up from his sleep, or are you feeding him when he's falling asleep (which would be good at night, but not during the day). I use the Baby Whisperer's method of feeding to wake, called the EASY method. You can research more about it on google. Maybe that will help.

    Breastfeeding is hard the first several weeks, but then it gets much easier.

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