Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 24

Thread: So Tired

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    10,440

    Default Re: So Tired

    I would totally second DJ's Mom. Carry your baby in a sling, particularly during the fussy times and times you need to be somewhere. That way, the baby can nurse and snuggle while you interact with your older child and get stuff done. If you aren't already, is there any way you can cosleep so you can at least nurse laying down? Once I figured out how to do that, I felt like a new woman!

    A mother's helper, if you can get one, would be second on my list of things to find. You could clean, or rest, or whatever, while they play with at least your three year old.

    And you will get through a year. My SIL has six children, one born during her hubby's first tour through Iraq, stationed out in Hawaii, thousands of miles from any family or friends. She wanted to tear her hair at times, but she and all the kids survived and thrived, actually. He's been redeployed back to Iraq again, and so far, so good.

    By the time your DH has to leave in January, your baby will be much easier to cope with and not so high maintenance. And your three year old will change too in the next few months. It's so hard to remember how quickly they change when you are in the trenches.

    Hang in there! We ALL feel like non-successes on some days.

    Oh, and formula is a big hassle. You have to a) get out of the house and go buy it, a feat with two small children, b) wash bottles and all that jazz, and c) then contend with your engorgement. It could damage your supply in the end. It also costs a small fortune. You can make it through without formula
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    1,712

    Default Re: So Tired

    I don't have time to read the pp, so hopefully I am not giving you advice you have already received. My DH works about 70-80 hrs a week, so I completely understand you there. I have an older son, but he is in school, so I have the days with only the baby. My son had trouble potty training and hindsight is 20/20. I let him stay in pull ups way too long. Once I switched to cloth trainers, he imediately was trained. I remember once he peed the cloth would be soaked and he would walk with his legs spread out. He did that about 3 times and never again. My friend had a little girl who would go upstairs and put a pull up on if she needed to poop. I told her to quit buying the pull ups, once she did, she started going in the potty. I am not sure what your specific problem is, but maybe that will help.

    Nursing in public is very hard at first, but you will start to learn better. Get a front carrier or sling to carry lo in. Lo will probably fall asleep while the two of you are out and if you have to stop to nurse, have something for the toddler to do in the car, so she's not bored. Maybe a leappad or something. Or a portable DVD player. Give rewards when she is good.

    And try working on the side lying postition and cosleeping.

    Good Luck.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    14

    Default Re: So Tired

    i was nursing lying down at night but I have this horrible fear of rolling onto him. also a family member told me a horrible story about a family where the older child got into bed with mom and baby and ended up rolling onto the baby. my husband also almost rolled onto baby the other night. he is such a deep sleeper. I have a sling and and snugli backpack. the backpack is not working yet from low head control. I don't think i got the right kind of sling to nurse in while doing stuff. it is a sling rider carrier by infantino.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    1,712

    Default Re: So Tired

    I am not sure about slings as I don't have one. I had a front carrier which she is too small for now. They are great, but you can't really nurse in most of them. Hands free anyway. I think with slings, it takes practice. I agree not to let the baby sleep between you and your husband. When my DD was newborn, she slept on my chest. Now she sleeps between me and the side of the bed. You could try a cosleeper. Just nursing lying down until she falls asleep can help you not to have to get up, go to a chair or sit up in bed. Then move her to her bed, bassinet, car seat or whereever she sleeps.

    I meant to send you this link for making sure the latch is correct.
    http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/positioning.html

  5. #15
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,178

    Default Re: So Tired

    Hi There. I feel your pain, my oldest is now 3 years 8 months, and my youngest is 7 months old. I was in a similar position about 6 months ago....no extended family helping and a collicky baby and a 3 year old who needs momma even more with the new baby.

    I did what others have been suggesting...carry baby in a sling. It seemed to really work. Especially if we ran out of something and had to run to Walmart alone. Baby went in the sling and Big Brother rode in the shopping cart. Sorry, I don't think I've seen a pic of what your sling lookes like. My sling is a ring sling. Maya Wrap sells them online at their website, www.mayawrap.com but they were like $40 or $50 . They also have a section called Low Cost Options (i think) that gives instructions on how to make their slings or sells gently used ones. I made mine with their instructions and it turned out great. Maya Wrap also has online video instructions on how to use their sling in different ways...like nursing in it...maybe that would help you even if your sling isn't the same.

    Regarding your 3 yr old, what has really helped us, is that whenever hubby is available, I spend alone time with our older son. For instance, every once in a while, we go on a "date" (that's what he calls it) We go to like McDonalds and the park...or somewhere special...even if it doesn't cost money. With a little one nursing, we usually can only get away for like 1.5 hours, but its worth it. Our oldest son's behavior improves dramatically whenever we can make the time to do that. My hubby also makes time 15 or 20 minutes at bedtime so I can spend that time alone with our oldest son after Daddy tucks him in...we sing songs and discuss what we're going to do the next day. He loves that too.

    About potty training...if you think your son is almost ready to be trained, maybe you could work on that in a month or so after things calm down with the baby...but before your hubby leaves. We ended up buying underwear and taking off our son's diaper and just not putting a diaper on again...except for at night for a while. It was kind of messy, but he trained within a couple of weeks completely. There are messes, but I think they might be easier to deal with while your hubby is still here even if he's gone alot, instead of waiting until he leaves and you have to deal with that too.

    My hubby was in the Navy before we got married...unfortunately, he got out right before we got married, so I don't have any experience with dealing with everyday life while dh is deployed...but... I assume your dh is in the Army (Fort Stewart is your location...I guessed) and you're probably living on the base if you're 1000 miles away from family. I don't know if that's any different from the Navy, but my dh said that whenever he deployed...him and all the other guys... the Admiral's wife really took care of alot of stuff regarding the guys' families. I guess that was her "official" job. Maybe your dh's commanding officer's wife could set you up with some babysitter suggestions...or maybe there's even some sort of support group on base for families...you might meet people with common interests...maybe even trade off babysitting duties or at least be able to visit or shop together. Also, church is a great place to meet other people, and if you don't have a problem using the nursery for your little one, it could give your arms a break for an hour at least during the service. Even an hour is a pick me up. Plus, your oldest son would probably love Sunday School...mine does...I'm a stay at home mom and he doesn't get to play with his friends every week, so he loves going to church.

    If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me. I'd love to talk.

    Shell

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,465

    Default Re: So Tired

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia'sMom;66732 They are great, but you can't really nurse in most of them. Hands free anyway. I think with slings, it takes practice. I agree not to let the baby sleep between you and your husband. When my DD was newborn, she slept on my chest. Now she sleeps between me and the side of the bed. You could try a cosleeper. Just nursing lying down until she falls asleep can help you not to have to get up, go to a chair or sit up in bed. Then move her to her bed, bassinet, car seat or whereever she sleeps.

    I meant to send you this link for making sure the latch is correct.
    [url
    http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/positioning.html[/url]
    They do take a little practice to nurse in.....but nursing takes practice in general and it's totally worth it. Just in the same way that you are now hands free and can move around, You don't have to stop what your doing to feed your baby! In the house or out!

    Return the Infatimo carrier! It's not real. You can't bend over w/ it and when I went to a baby carrying class the woman who taught it said it's a fashion piece not a functional carrier.( I had one too. I returned it. ) For $5more You can get a Moby Wrap. Which takes a little practice yes, but you can bend over and get laundry out of the dryer,out of the hamper and bend over in a store or bank and write a check and never worrying about the baby falling out and your can nurse your child in public w/out anyhassle or anyone even noticing. And babies who are wrapped or slung are MUCH LESS colicky. YUour not responding to the comments about a helper. So if that's totally out of the question, get a serious wrap or sling. If you scroll down the board there's a whole section devoted to babywearing.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,107

    Default Re: So Tired

    Regarding co-sleeping: don't listen to the horror stories! It's a life-saver when you have a LO who's up all night. You will not roll onto your baby- trust me. I co-slept for the first 6 months and always knew exactly where my daughter was. I never rolled on her, and I've heard that there's been research done that shows that moms aren't the ones who roll on babies. It's like moms have a 6th sense about where their baby is. Dads and older children, however, do seem to lack that sixth sense. But that doesn't mean you can't co-sleep anyway. Check out co-sleeping cribs- they're like sidecars for an adult bed. We have the Arm's Reach Co-Sleeper. There are also little enclosure-type deals that fit inside an adult bed, providing a barrier between parents and babies. Trust yourself!

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    24

    Default Re: So Tired

    I have a 7 wo and I agree with the pp about cosleeping. Here's what we are doing. I go to bed at 9pm hubby stays up later and typically takes DD 1st feeding at anywhere between 12 and 1am. That way, I can sometimes sleep until around 3 or 4 when DD wakes again! Honestly, my one breast starts to leak before that time, though so I end up having to pump earlier than the 3 or 4 timeframe. Regardless, when DD does wake and it's my turn to take her, I bring her to bed and she nurses in the sidelying position. My breasts are pretty small, so I have to lay on my side, but I am hyper aware of DD being there. I either put my arm on the other side of her or put my head right near her head. Basically, if anything were to happen to her, it would happen to me too and wake me up. It has made such a huge difference in my day to get the sleep I've been getting. For the most part, I'm getting 3 hours in the evening, and around 3 hours in the early morning so 6 to 7 hours of sleep total!

    I am blessed with the best husband in the world. He's a f/t student, so he has student type hours and is able to help out a tremendous amount.

    However, we are also supplementing b/c I have tried everything to get my milk supply up and nothing worked. I was so stressed out and tired that I was sinking into a serious depression and I was convinced I didn't know what the heck I was doing. I've lightened up the pressure on myself to breastfeed and we've figured out a bit of a routine for good sleep and those 2 things have made such a big difference in my sanity.

    As great as exclusively bf'ing is, don't sacrifice your sanity for it. If I could have done it exclusively I would have, but I was making myself nuts and crying on an hourly basis and I needed to give myself a break.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    24

    Default Re: So Tired

    ps. check out www.attachedtobaby.com for carriers and www.thebabywearer.com

    Here's what the lady who emailed me back from attachedtobaby.com said when I asked for recommendations...

    First, a snuggly comfy carrier for a newborn up to about 20 pounds or so, is the Moby wrap. It can be worn with heavier babies but due to the stretch, is not as comfy with heavier kids. It is warm and perfect for newborns... similar to a thick t-shirt.

    I personally love pouches and ring slings for everyday use. They are easy to take on and off and you can put your baby in a variety of carries. My personal favorite is the Zolowear, but Oopa, the padded Mayawrap and the new PSling are also excellent choices. I like Ring Slings because you can adjust to the perfect size for each carry. If you are not fond of the tail hanging down in front... a pouch is an excellent choice. I love the Microfleece Peanut Shell for newborns because it is so soft and stretchy. It is also nice for older kids as well and easy to size due to the stretch.

    Lastly, if you want something that will last you from birth until the toddler years... I highly recommend a woven wrap. My personal favorites are the Didymos and Storchenwiege.

    All of the choices should give you great head and neck support as well as versatility.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: So Tired

    Tired.... I can definitely relate. Here is a funny story that may cheer you up. I nurse my lo every 2 hours non stop for the past month.... well last week, I woke up in the middle of the night and was nursing what I thought was the baby. My husband was looking at me like I was nuts. For some reason I thought the baby slipped under the blankets and I was frantically looking for him. My husband was like what are you doing ? I was like feeding the baby but I wanted to say something like he slipped under the blankets or something...mind you I was still half asleep and quite groggy .... so I started looking for him in the blankets. My husband was like, honey he is in the crib. I knew right then and there that I was sleep deprived and slowly going to lose it !

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •