It is interesting that you stopped offering when the 10 month old striked. I guess I shouldn't try for awhile either. I have been trying just a few times a day and getting pushed away. I usually try once when he is drowsy and once when he is actually asleep (in the evening). He pushes me away in his sleep, which amazes me. He is still barely taking in any liquids and barely peeing. He is hitting the bare minimum of liquids per day, but eating foods well.
I appreciate all of you "feeling" my pain with me. I am just so sad. I wish he would let me just cuddle him, but he won't. The cuddle time I had was through nursing him, and he seemed to really enjoy it. He would play with my earring, my hair, and sometimes I would gently tease him and he would smile a lot while nursing. All of those times are gone, and I miss them like crazy. I wonder how long this mourning period will last. I don't know how my husband will feel about rerenting the pump, because it is 50 dollars per month, and we are very tight financially right now. He hasn't nursed even once for seven whole days now and is adamant about not wanting to.
Thanks again for all of your responses. I can only do so much, and he seems to not miss nursing at all, which breaks my heart even more.