Re: Picking "all done" dates?
DD also seems to get the most milk at nap time. Not sure why that is either but wanted to share. I am pregnant with #2 and thought DD would wean on her own.. no dice. She is adamant that we nurse at least for nap and bedtime. If I get out of bed in the morning before she climbs in or as she climbs in, we don't nurse that morning and she seems fine with it.
I wouldn't set deadlines, I'd just start changing things around until you can live with it. For me if I feel touched out, I get out of bed in the morning before she can nurse. I also limit nursing at night to once she unlatches she gets the other side and 2 sides and we are finished. I find the nap time one to be the most relaxing as I need the hour to relax and so does she, so it is mutually beneficial to nurse her at that time. KWIM
Hope this helps and best of luck.
Laurie (Mommy to Addison born 10/7/08 and still breastfeeding with love and limits. DS due 12/1/10)