Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14

Thread: 3 year old- suggestions?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    547

    Default 3 year old- suggestions?

    dd turned 3 on 10/10 and is still nursing. She only nurses to sleep and early in the morning before getting up (& the occasional nap time on the weekend). I would like to gently wean her soon (I'd hoped she'd do it herself, but it doesn't look like that's happening any time soon, of course, she's also not big on potty training or sleeping in her own bed which are the other issues we're about to tackle). Any suggestions on how to talk to her about it or encourage her to make it more her idea? I don't want to just say "that's it, no more", but I would like her to be done in the next few months at most.
    since 10/10/07
    and still going...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    1,097

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    For the night time session - could daddy take over bedtime? She will very likely protest at first but if they get their own fun routine going she may go for it after a while. For mornings, how early is early? You could try getting up and dressed a few minutes before she wakes and entice her with breakfast as soon as she wakes. You mention that you will be potty training and working on a "big girl" bed soon, IMO I'd put weaning on the back burner for now (maybe try these things along with don't offer, don't refuse but don't push it). Potty training and transitioning to a new bed can be pretty big changes for a little one and bringing them up along with weaning might be a little too much and backfire.

    Unfortunately I've never been there with a nursling of that age so I don't speak from experience...just my first thoughts. I'm sure other mamas who have BTDT will chime in and help more than I can!

    Well done nursing until 3, what an accomplishment!
    Mama of two precious girls
    DD1 born 23 July 2008 and
    DD2 born 14 January 2010

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    547

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    Yeah, I think potty training and her own bed are the priority, then weaning. I just thought maybe I can start talking to her about it now, but I don't want to freak her out with too much at once either. In the morning she nurses around 6am or so and sleeps until 8 or 8:30, so maybe if I can get her in her own bed, that will work itself out Anyone have any ideas on how to talk to her about it without pushing too much? I've tried telling her as she gets older she won't need milkies anymore, but I haven't said how old that will be....Her daddy occasionally says something like "aren't you getting too old for that?" but that just makes her cling to me more...
    since 10/10/07
    and still going...

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    sarah nursed untill she was 4 and at that point it was just to go to sleep at night.. that was about 6 monhts. What kept me going was the thought of flu season.
    when she was ready she didn't have any tears about it. she was just done.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    547

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    did she tell you she was done or did you suggest it?
    since 10/10/07
    and still going...

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    860

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    when my now 20 year old son was 4 and showed no signs of weaning I offered to read him a book on my lap w/ a sippy cup of water and he happily agreed. Much to my chagrin he weaned that very week. he was ready. I was the one who needed to find other ways to connect to him. i liked nursing b/c it was brainless and convenient. Finding alternatives took forethought.
    DD#1 July 1986 VB
    DD#2 April 1988 c/sec
    DS#3 April 1990 VBAC
    DS#4 June 1993 VB
    and suprise!
    DD#5 April 2001 c/sec
    BTDT scars and stretchmarks,: wrinkles and grey hair

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    yup when she was turning 4 I just said you know that hurts mommy..
    and by then she wasn't getting much milk anyways so we would sub a big drink of water before bed instead of nurseing and lots and lots of books and back rubs and songs.

    You guys will figure it out...
    is your so willing to do bedtime for a while????

    My hubby works a crazy shift and is ready for bed at 7pm so most of the time he was already sleeping, it would have been very easy to get him to do the stories and bed time routine.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,469

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    With DJ we talked about it A LOT before. Like I was planning on being Done in Feb. Right after we got back from Vacation and he Turned 4 in Dec. But he wasn't ready and it was too much stress for me and him. Because he was clinging extra tight with fervor.....much like he did with his diaper a year before. It was a part of growing up and growing up is scary and hard. So I let it go. And then in June when he was 4.5 We mentioned that the doctors said it might be that I was still nursing that was why we couldn't get a new baby to come. Because my body might think I still had a baby. That did it. That AND me offering to get a tattoo to memorialize it so that when we were missing it we could look at it and remember. The beautiful thing about nursing until you can get their input and they feel like they are walking away on their own is that it helps them feel like it's NOT being ripped away. But that they have had enough. And in doing that there is no sadness for them. And if they can talk then they won't forget.

    Way too lazy for formula

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    439

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    dj's mom, what does your tattoo look like? sounds like a cool idea!

    Jades mom, my DS weaned shortly before his 3rd birthday. The last two nursing sessions to go were first thing in the morning, and last thing at night. You might want to start to take yourself out of the picture a little bit and see how DD does without you - do you have a partner who can put her to bed sometimes?

    We still cuddle in bed in the morning - I find that mornings are more pleasant with DS if we have had a gradual process of getting out of bed. But we cuddle and play, we don't nurse. When it got to the point that I was ready for weaning I stopped offering DS my breast, and waited for him to ask instead. That was probably the first step. And if he didn't ask, I didn't mention anything about it.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,469

    Default Re: 3 year old- suggestions?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jewelsf View Post
    dj's mom, what does your tattoo look like? sounds like a cool idea!
    Here is my entry from the Ink thread
    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*djs.mom View Post
    To quote Kelly Ann: So happy am I!! This is the final stage of our weaning Journey. I told him I was going to get this tat so that whenever we were sad or we were missing it...we could look at mommy. And there'd be a picture to remind us of this very special thing we did together for so very long. My tatoo artist using shading has given the mudflap girl dimension and turned her into me. A tribute to me and DJ. Complete with DJ's little Mohawk. This morning when he ran out to see it for the first time....he was very happy. And didn't want to nurse. And I feel better. How can I forget now? All my tats are about spaces in time that I have been in and wanted to capture. Nursing mother.....but still Shelly and on her way back....it's a hard space to be in quite honestly. But I'll take it. And I don't want to forget what it was like to be right here. In this moment. Before it slips away.

    Way too lazy for formula

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •