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Thread: PPD? Please help

  1. #1

    Default PPD? Please help

    Im a first time mom, I had a horrible pregnancy mostly because the only one that "supported" me was my dogd )=
    My family completely abandoned me, my mother wouldnt even come visit. I threw up constantly for 24 weeks and was too weak, tired and depressed to go out and I spent at least 12 hrs on my own in my house since my husband had to go to work, so I ask my mom to give me some company and she refused to to that for the 9 months I was pregnant, this was just horrible to me, I became so very depressed, I did not wanna talk to anyone let alone go out. It really were 9 very tough months for me. After my daughter was born, I received no help (again) she had to stay in the hospital for 4 extra days (jaundice) and could not drive back and forth to the hospital (I live very far from it, and I had a csection) so I could only go for 2 or 3 takes, somedays I would stay in the hospital for 6-9 hrs so I could feed her. Unfortunately she became so very used to bottles that breastfeeding has been very difficult, I have never been able to satisfy her needs and had to use formula. I am so very exhausted, depressed and very dissapointed of myself. I have spent my days crying non stop, I developed agorafobia, and stopped driving (im actually terrified of it, everytime I have tried I have awful panic attacks). My daughter, thank God, has gained weight and is very healthy, but on the other hand Im losing a lot of weight (even my hair is falling), haven't been able to sleep (BF and plain anxiety). I dont know if I have PPD. I have 2 small dogs and honestly they are the only thing that make me laugh lately. Everyone keeps telling me to get rid of them because of the baby, but if I do, I think I will lose the little sanity I have left. I feel so very alone and dissapointed with the BF thing. Also after only 8 weeks, I have started my period again and my milk supply seems to be decreasing...I am the worst mother in the world, even my mom says so. )=

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Landof2toddlers, Oregon

    Default Re: PPD? Please help

    You need to tell your ob/mw what you just told us. They can screen you for PPD and might be able to hook you up with some help. You shouldn't be doing this on your own mama.
    proud but exhausted working mammy to two high needs babies

    • my surprise baby: the one and only D-Man born 3 weeks late (5/5/08) at 9 lbs 14 oz and 21.5 inches, and
    • the shock H-Girl born about a week late (10/7/09) at 8lbs 15oz and 20.75 inches.

    If I am here I am covered in baby (probably two) and fighting for control of the keyboard.

    Family beds are awesome

    Wondering if you have PPD? Take the screening and see your doctor. You deserve to feel better.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2010

    Default Re: PPD? Please help

    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go talk to your Dr. It sounds very much like PPD to me. You are not a bad mother for having PPD! (((HUGS))). I beg you to talk to your Dr. or your husband or both! There are meds that you can take for PPD and still breastfeed. Zoloft is a good one. I'm on that and I EBF my DD. And Shame on your family for abandoning you while pregnant and telling you that your a bad mother!

    Mama to
    Addi Born 2/22/08 and supplemented for 3 months
    Charlotte (Charlie) born 7/26/10 EBF and going strong!

    Wife to my best friend and a wonderful man Mike

    My family blog
    That Jakcsy Family

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Ontario, Canada

    Default Re: PPD? Please help

    Please talk to your doctor. I have ppd too and have had depression in the past. It isn't fun and recovery is a long road but there IS light at the end of the tunnel. Keep faith.
    Mother to the wonderful Teya - born June 21, 2010

    Wife to Pat Sept 13, 2008

    We are and at school

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2010

    Default Re: PPD? Please help

    oh lordy, definitely sounds like PPD to me. My husband was so worried about me at one point (i am by nature easy going and not easy to anger) because I was SCREAMING at him that he called a psychologist to get me to go. I was angry with him for doing it without my knowing, and i was reluctant to follow up with his return phone call because I didn't want to be depressed. I wanted to be a natural in motherhood. Let me tell you, going to the therapist was the best thing i ever did for our family. My DH doesn't wear his emotion on his sleeve, but the other night he told me how proud of me he was that I'd been going to see the therapist regularly and how much it had helped our little family. Just my thoughts there....

    As for the dogs - do you trust them with your LO? I know the only thing that helped me stay connected to reality in the first few weeks was my dog. She grounded me and sat next to me for hours on end while i nursed and cried and nursed and slept. She was my rock. Don't abandon your dogs unless they're dangerous to your child.

    Please feel free to ask any more questions. Don't be embarrassed that you might be depressed - it's very common and natural for your body to go through this period. I also got my period back very early -- makes me wonder if women who resume menstruation early are more prone to PPD? maybe, maybe not. But just try and accept where you are right now and don't judge. Keep nursing nursing nursing -- when it starts to become easier (and it will) it will be the best thing you ever did.
    Julia and Maxwell (and Dan and Haddie)
    Maxwell, born January 3, 2010
    A year on Mama's milk and still loving it

  6. #6

    Smile Re: PPD? Please help

    Thanks so much for ur support. I have an appointment with my OBGYN and I will talk to him about this, I feel a little ashamed about it, but as you all said it is important I do so.

    Im nursing non stop every 3-4 hrs and my milk supply is not increasing! Im also pumping a few times a day.

    Fortunately my dogs are angels, they are kind but very protective of the 3 of us. But at the moment I dont let them touch her since she was born with low weight (she is improving fast (= ) I thought best to weight a while.

    You are all angels! Im very happy to have joined this forum and be in contact with great moms (=

    Thanks again

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