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Thread: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    My DS is incredible!

    I am always telling myself that he will bf less as he grows and that he will drop some of those nursing sessions. To no avail! He nurses every 3 hours and all through the night, sometimes 5 times a night. I am not getting much sleep except when my DH takes him on his mornings off so I can have a lie in (thankfully, or I don't know how I would have survived). Both of us are sleep deprived 19 months in and I just can't imagine going back to work with so little sleep. Forget the times he's teething and gets up at 3 am and stays up for 2 hours...

    What do you guys think? Should we night wean him or wean him altogether? I heard bfing moms say that their babies slept through the night once they were done bfing. Has anyone had their bfing toddler sleep longer as they got older after such a pattern?
    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

  2. #2

    Default Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    Granted my DS has some health issues at play, but he nursed like a newborn -- usually every 2 hours, at least -- until he was 2 years old. He slowly cut back from there and then, when he was about 2 1/2 he suddenly just stopped nursing except to go to sleep and to wake up (which was still frequent at night, but barely at all during the day).

    He still nurses at night (he's 3 1/2), but he does sleep for longer stretches than ever before. Honestly, I think that for some LO's the combination of all the developmental changes -- physical, emotional and social -- just really overwhelm them and for some, nursing is where that reveals itself.

    I totally understand your feelings about sleep. I gave up a thriving landscaping business because I would just randomly forget the names of plants and other important words while talking, and the idea of trying to sit and draw up plans just seemed impossible. It was really hard to let go (especially because I am at an age where it isn't easy to get back in and make a go of it), but I was fortunate to be able to do so, and I have done odd/temp jobs when we've needed additional income.

    My own personal choice to just continue breastfeeding on demand had mostly to do with my trust in my son's needs and intuition. I just couldn't ever shake the feeling that he still NEEDED to nurse the way he did (which, again, had a little more oomph in his case since he also didn't really eat solids until he was 2). So my advice is to sit with the idea of night weaning, feel it with all that you know about yourself and your LO. It may be just the things to help him sleep. Or it may not. IMO it needs to feel okay to you that he is night weaned even if he still wakes up just as much (which for those with partners who can get up with them, it often is).

    I found the period between 18 and 30 months to be the hardest for me in terms of confusion about my role in our breastfeeding relationship. I had a lot of conflicting feelings, and, in the end, I chose to just go with my intuition, rather than my sleep deprived and desperate brain.
    Mama to Lorenzo, born 4/25/2007. NICU graduate, Gastro-Esohapgeal Reflux, Obstructive Sleep Apnea, Sensory Processing Disorder...alive and thriving thanks to breastfeeding and co-sleeping.

    Those who say it can't be done should not interrupt the person doing it.
    Chinese Proverb

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Toronto, Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    430

    Default Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?



    DD is 22 months and still nurses every single opportunity she gets which is far more then every 2 hours during the day and constantly at night. I think if you weaned now your going to have a heck of a time with the two year molars. I totally understand the frustration and lack of sleep I have no one to take DD off my hands to get any kind of sleep since it's just me and her and its rough rough rough sometimes. I wouldn't fully wean. I think since he is obviously so attached to nursing that it would be hard for him and probably harder for you then you anticipate. Have you looked into Dr.Gordon's night weaning? That might be an option for you at night, or have your DH take over bedtime and see how that goes? If that goes well you might really begin to appreciate and enjoy the day time nursing
    First time mom to Kalyna born December 14th 2008

    Born: 7lbs 7oz
    Month 1: 8lbs
    Week 5: 8lbs 6oz
    Week 7: 9lbs 5oz
    Week 9: 10lbs 2.6oz
    Week 17: 14lbs 7oz

    Nursing a 3.5 year old!
    Love , and

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    101

    Default Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    Your replies give me hope, courage but also make me apprehensive. We will attempt night weaning over Thanksgiving and see what happens. If he gets up just as much then it will be more work for us to put him back to sleep by rocking, walking him or any other method and we may go back to night nursing... I don't know! My hope and prayer is that he cuts back himself. Day nursing isn't so problematic as I'm already up. The early mornings are the ones that drive me bananas as he drinks all the milk I have and then still whines for more until he wakes me up completely. Right now, if he does this near 7 am, I just tell him to go to his father who sleeps next door. Then I get an hour or so sleep to get me in my right mind.

    On another note, I went for an interview for a part time gig today, only one afternoon a week but it's something. We'll see...
    Proud Momma to Emmanuel Stephen (2/14/09).

    22 months and counting!
    :

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Ann Arbor, MI
    Posts
    76

    Default Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    I know many two year olds that nurse like newborns from my la leche league meetings so take comfort that you are far from alone I remember reading in the old edition of the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding that if you find yourself constantly nursing a toddler that maybe nursing has become so easy for you that it was become your primary way of bonding with your baby and if you increase the attention you pay to him in other ways (playing, reading, nature walks, etc) that the frequency will slow down. Just a thought, maybe it will help

    9 yrs. w/ DH
    mother to Dylan
    11/27/2009 ~ 7 lbs. 3 oz. ~ 20 & 1/2 inches

    and and


    we're almost to THREE YEARS!

  6. #6

    Thumbs up Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    thank the lord for this post, I thought I was going mad, my 12 month old is exactly as you describe above and I am constantly bombarded from what seems all quarters of society with "he should be off the breast by now" and "you should just use controlled crying then he wouldn't come into your bed" etc etc.

    I had always intended to feed my baby until he self weans and I feed him on demand and this post gives me renewed determination .............. thank you thank you thank you ladies xxx

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Victoria, BC, Canada
    Posts
    940

    Default Re: Can I just tell you he nurses like a newborn?

    Try spending 2 hours in kindergym, a few hours outdoors, then feeding your babies pizza before bed.

    We found the No-Cry-Sleep Solution a very helpful book, with lots of different ideas.

    So true that weaning doesn't mean they'll stop waking up at night-have heard this from lots of moms.
    Canadian mom and breastmilk fan.
    We have 2 beautiful children: Luana who's 9 y/o, had breastmilk for 2 years and is smart as a whip. Lucas who came out kickin', is 4 y/o and continues to enjoy his milkies.

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