Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 12

Thread: Is weaning the best option??

  1. #1

    Default Is weaning the best option??

    Some background: My ds has just turned one. Breastfeeding has been brilliant and i hadn't planned on stopping too soon. He hasn't ever slept more than 5hrs, usually 7.30-11.30/12.30, then awake every 1.5-2hrs for nite for quick nursing then straight back asleep. We co-sleep so it's not big problem. It would be nice if he slept longer but he's so good during the day i can't complain. During the day he nurses to sleep but will usually go to sleep without nursing for other family members during the day but not so much the few times we have gone out at night. He wakes up and won't go back asleep at the 11.30/12 wake up.

    Now, first, we are planning a second baby and hope to get pregnant before next Summer. I haven't had a period yet which i am putting down to the continuous nursing at night so i guess this is going to be a problem. I have been taking pregnacare and iron as i heard this might help. Any suggestions?

    2nd, we have our best friends wedding in 6 weeks, my dh and i are part of the wedding so we have to be there the night before. It is about 4-5hrs away. No children are being invited so i don't know what to do with our ds. The rooms in hotel are costing 300 for the 2 nights so bringing someone to babysit there while we are at the wedding isn't really financially possible. I don't know if he'll last the 2nights without nursing to sleep etc. I had kinda presumed he would be sleeping more through the night by this stage so leaving him with my mum or mil wouldn't have been such a big issue.

    Should i think about weaning him now before the wedding and then hopefully he won't mind too much if we are away for 2 nights? I had planned on letting him wean when he wanted so it's not an ideal choice but we have another wedding after Christmas too so i have to think of that one too. And also the issue of getting pregnant again!

    Thanks in advance.

  2. #2

    Default 2 nites away, need to wean baby??

    Some background: My ds has just turned one. Breastfeeding has been brilliant and i hadn't planned on stopping too soon. He hasn't ever slept more than 5hrs, usually 7.30-11.30/12.30, then awake every 1.5-2hrs for nite for quick nursing then straight back asleep. We co-sleep so it's not big problem. It would be nice if he slept longer but he's so good during the day i can't complain. During the day he nurses to sleep but will usually go to sleep without nursing for other family members during the day but not so much the few times we have gone out at night. He wakes up and won't go back asleep at the 11.30/12 wake up.

    Now, first, we are planning a second baby and hope to get pregnant before next Summer. I haven't had a period yet which i am putting down to the continuous nursing at night so i guess this is going to be a problem. I have been taking pregnacare and iron as i heard this might help. Any suggestions?

    2nd, we have our best friends wedding in 6 weeks, my dh and i are part of the wedding so we have to be there the night before. It is about 4-5hrs away. No children are being invited so i don't know what to do with our ds. The rooms in hotel are costing 300 for the 2 nights so bringing someone to babysit there while we are at the wedding isn't really financially possible. I don't know if he'll last the 2nights without nursing to sleep etc. I had kinda presumed he would be sleeping more through the night by this stage so leaving him with my mum or mil wouldn't have been such a big issue.

    Should i think about weaning him now before the wedding and then hopefully he won't mind too much if we are away for 2 nights? I had planned on letting him wean when he wanted so it's not an ideal choice but we have another wedding after Christmas too so i have to think of that one too. And also the issue of getting pregnant again!

    Thanks in advance.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,780

    Default Re: 2 nites away, need to wean baby??

    Youw ouldn't have to wean for the wedding. You may have a dip in supply but also I would assume you would pump for your own relief during the time away, as to not get engorged etc.

    You can pump a couple bottles for those nights ahead of time and they can give him a bottle or you may be surprised and he will adjust because he will be in capable hands and he will know he is loved and that they can't nurse him. Are you currenlty pumping or have given a bottle?
    Kelly

    Mommy to Gabriel born 12/25/06 Breastfed 12/25/06 - 12/09 and possibly here and there still
    Madelyn born 9/24/09 delivered at home and caught by my husband

    "To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right."

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Posts
    780

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    keeping in mind that I have not personally breastfed past one yet, I don't think you need to wean. Many mammas have become pregnant while still breastfeeding. Sometimes they don't even have a period first! Other mammas on here have more information about fertility though. As for the wedding and leaving lo with someone else. The first time my ds1 sttn was at my mothers house without me there. I was soooo worried about him waking up several times, but she just put him in bed and he went to sleep. No crying, no fussing. I think that after only 2 day at that age it should be fine to resume breastfeeding when you are back together. I would take a pump though because you will probably become engorged and need some relief.
    Mommy to 2 little boys!
    DS1 11/1/07 BFed 7 months
    DS2 11/6/09 BF 2 YEARS! and counting!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    SW Ohio
    Posts
    3,133

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    Personally, if it were me, I would just work on night-weaning to start. Often reducing how much you nurse at night will be enough to get your period to return. You could try Dr. Jay Gordon's method for nightweaning... I don't have a linkie handy, but you could probably Google it and find out the technique.

    As for being away from your LO for 2 days... I personally would not wean just for that. You could just as easily pump for a couple days, and I would bet money your LO will come back to the breast once the two of you are back together after your trip. Since he's over 1 year old, he can just eat solids and drink water or cow's milk or pumped breastmilk if you have any, while you are apart.
    IRL all my friends call me Buff, Wife to CB since 10/11/2003

    Mom to DD - "MJ" born 9/2007 @ 8lbs 10oz, 21.5" She's 6 years old!
    My journey nursing MJ started HERE, but we got through it and she breastfed 19.5 months, self-weaned on 5/17/09


    Mom to my current nursling, DS - "ME" born 10/2009 @ 10lbs 1oz, 22.25" He's 4 years old! And yup, he's still nursing.

    Ask me about my successful VBAC! Click here for my birth story.



  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    20,783

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*buff24 View Post
    Personally, if it were me, I would just work on night-weaning to start. Often reducing how much you nurse at night will be enough to get your period to return. You could try Dr. Jay Gordon's method for nightweaning... I don't have a linkie handy, but you could probably Google it and find out the technique.

    As for being away from your LO for 2 days... I personally would not wean just for that. You could just as easily pump for a couple days, and I would bet money your LO will come back to the breast once the two of you are back together after your trip. Since he's over 1 year old, he can just eat solids and drink water or cow's milk or pumped breastmilk if you have any, while you are apart.


    The Jay Gordon method: http://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html

    Keep in mnd that the average time until return of fertility for a breastfeeding mom is around 15 months- so yours may be right around the corner. Night-weaning is a great way to encourage it to return.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  7. #7

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    Thanks a million, that Jay Gordan method sounds great. I think we will try that. I might get dh to sleep in the guest room for a few nights until we try get the hang of it.
    I would feel much better leaving him with someone if he was sleeping more at night and was never sure how to actually go about night weaning him without lots of tears. The 11-6am rule sounds ideal. Fingers crossed it will work.
    I would love to keep up 2-3 nursings a day, morning, afternoon and bed for the moment.

    Thanks again

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    miles from nowhere
    Posts
    11,108

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    My daughter nursed a lot at night and when I was planning an overnight trip away my husband and I were both very concerned about how she would do overnight without me there. It turned out there wasn't much to worry about. She was aware I wasn't there and actually slept better than usual because she knew the breast wasn't available. She wouldn't even take the bottle DH offered, she just rolled over and went back to sleep.

    So there might not be anything to worry about. Try the Gordon method, though if baby resists it's probably best to put it on hold a little longer. I think it works best and with the least amount of tears when baby is able to understand when you tell them no more milk until morning.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  9. #9

    Default Re: 2 nites away, need to wean baby??

    Thanks

    I just heard about Jay Gordan's plan for night weaning so i might try that in the next few weeks just so he's not too dependent on me to get back asleep. I kinda thought that weaning him fully might be the only way to get him to stop nursing at night but i'll try the Jay Gordan plan and see how that goes. I know he is not hungry, just looking for comfort. He has never taken a bottle for me but will drink from a sippy cup so i'll definitely pump some and leave a supply for him. He is very good to drink water during the day when he is thirsty.
    He is a tiny little baby, only 16lbs so he probably still needs a good bit of breastmilk even though he is over a year now.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    39

    Default Re: Is weaning the best option??

    I definitely wouldn't wean because of a wedding. IMHO, that is too many things to ask a little one to take on all at once - quick mother-led weaning (in less than a few weeks), plus 2 nights away from Mom. To me, that's a recipe for additional temper tantrums to have that many changes and separations, not fewer.

    I have not left my son for more than several hours at a time, but we have dealt with 4 weddings (including both of my siblings!) in my son's 14+ month life. It's a hassle, but I've pumped and/or snuck out to nurse my son at all the weddings, depending on the situation. You can pump ahead of time to have a freezer stash, and pump at the wedding. There are ways to arrange for this - use the bridal party room, or another mostly-private room, pump in the car, etc.

    We were freaked out about what we were going to do for childcare for my brother's wedding, which was out of the area (my sister's was near where we live, so we were able to arrange for a close friend to take care of him). My son was 10 1/2 months old at the time, and still nursing very frequently (every 2-3hrs during the day and at least 2x/night). At the last minute, my husband's sister changed around her vacation plans to come take care of our son during the rehearsal dinner and much of the day of the wedding. She stayed in the room with us at the hotel. It was crowded (queen-sized bed, roll-away twin, and our son's travel crib), but it was only two nights, and it was worth it to know he was taken care of by someone we trusted.

    I know this is a close friend, but you may also want to really think about whether or not it's worth taking the trip. Another one of the weddings we went to, we only found out (contrary to cultural expectations) that our son wasn't invited because we had asked. She was not a close family member, so had we not been planning on meeting up with other family and friends, we likely wouldn't have bothered with the time, expense and aggravation to go. But we managed to work out taking care of our son in shifts with other family members to help - it was kind of complicated, but we made it work.

    But, assuming you will be going one way or the other... I would suggest building up a freezer stash, make plans to pump every few hours while you're away, and implement a night routine that someone else could do with him. It won't be perfect - he probably won't like it - but hopefully it'll be good enough for two nights until you get home. Make sure the hotel room comes with a freezer (you'll need to not only freeze the milk, but also freeze freezer packs for transport home), or that they can give you one for the room.

    If you value the nursing relationship, weaning in a short period of time for something like a trip to a wedding - which is only 48hrs - is not worth sacrificing the nursing relationship for. It may well create more behavioral issues than it solves if the child truly does not feel ready to wean, and it's attempted in a very short time period.

    Just my $.02. Hope that helps.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •