Re: What else should I be doing?
The screaming while latching onto the bare breast may be because the feeling is unfamiliar, and your LO thinks that you're trying to "cheat" her out of a meal. Here's a link on nipple shields, and how to wean from them: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...an-shield.html
1.) If I use my nipple shield she'll latch onto it and try to suck though it's pretty half-hearted. I can hear her swallow when I let her latch on, though, so hopefully she's swallowing milk and not her own saliva or something far less exciting like that. If I attempt to latch her on without the nipple shield she screams. Why? Is it because it feels less like the bottle in addition to having to work harder to get a few meager mouthfuls?
First of all, you're a stay-at-home mom who is relactating and caring for an infant- mama, you are NOT unemployed! You're just not getting paid. Do you and your DH have the possibility of sleeping apart for a while? If he takes the guest bed and you sleep with the baby for a few weeks, it might be easier on everyone and give you more chances to nurse at night.
2.) I can't co sleep. I'm unemployed/stay at home mom, my husband works 5 10 hour shifts a week. While he's more than happy to take the baby on the weekends so I can catch up on sleep on the weeknights he'll quietly beg in his sleep for her to let him sleep or for me to take her out of the room. Sometimes it's cute, tonight though it just felt like a complete lack of support. I'm tired so I'm reading way too far into it. Is there anything different I can do to just give her two chances to nurse at night so I don't have to pump?
If sharing the bed won't work, how about keeping your LO really close? I sometimes kept my LO in a laundry basket right next to the bed. That way I could pick her up and nurse her the instant she stirred.
They say a lot of things, and often they are wrong. The 10 minute rule is a bad one, especially for a mom who is relactating. Let your baby spend as much time on the breast as possible- it won't hurt her or you, and it's good for supply.
3.) They say during normal breastfeeding to offer 10 minutes on each breast. Since I"m trying to rebuild my supply would it be sufficient, even with a nipple shield, to skip a few pumping sessions when she's not ravenous and let her try the breast for 20 minutes? Would that provide sufficient stimulation even though she's not doing much more than the pacifier flutter suck thing, or should I stick to pumping?
So, would it be sufficient to skip a pumping session in favor of a breastfeeding session? Maybe. If the baby is nursing well and removing lots of milk, it's probably better to nurse than to pump. If she's not (and the "pacifier flutter suck" description makes me think that she isn't, not yet), then you need to do some pumping in addition to the nursing. But don't think of any time at the breast as wasted time! Even comfort-sucking is great for getting the idea that breast = fun/comfort/food into your baby's head.
For some moms, the SNS is totally worth it. Others find it too tricky to handle. You don't know which one you are unless you try!
Oh, also, are the supplemental nursing systems from Medela worth it? Would it be worth investing in one to get her more willing to nurse?
When you say the pump is "popping my nipples back real hard after each suck," do you mean that your nips are shooting all the way out of the collection tube, with a feeling of loss of suction? If so, you may need a different (probably smaller) size of breast shield.
I hear they're cumbersome, but it can't be any worse than the medela symphony pump that keeps popping my nipples back real hard after each suck despite endless readjustment attempts. :P
Don't freak out! This is incredible progress!
I'm starting to kind of freak out a little, though. I'm consistently producing only 1/2 or 1 full oz per pump and I've been pumping going on two weeks now.
Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"