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Thread: Pacifiers! Please Help!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
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    7

    Exclamation Pacifiers! Please Help!

    OK, I know it's advised against to use pacifiers while breastfeeding but I really need to find one! The only way my son will go to sleep is if he's nursing! Because of this I can't get him to sleep in his crib (and co-sleeping is becoming an issue with mt husband big time!).

    So far I have tried these pacifiers: 1st years, mams, gerber, nuby, soothies, a store brand one from Fred's, and one that someone gave me but I don't know what kind it is. At birth he took the soothies with no probs, but after 2 days he refused it. He did the same with the one someone gave me. The others he just outright refuses.

    I really need to find one he'll take or some technique to get him to take one bc he won't fall asleep without sucking on something and I'm not able to get anything done around the house. So now I have a messy house, a hubby who constantly rides my butt bc of it, and a hubby that is overly cranky bc he can't get to sleep with the baby in the bed! I'm about to either lose my mind or get a divorce (thanks to my non-sleep getting cranky ass hubby)!

    Does anyone have any pacifer recommendations or techniques they have tried to get a baby to take one?!?! TIA!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    1,967

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    Sorry to hear that you are dealing with a cranky husband on top of everything else! Even though pacifiers are frowned upon, my daughter takes one without a fuss and without any nipple confusion. (I will say that I have a very happy, easy baby who latches on well- which is not the case with everyone). She does not suck a pacifier all the time, and I don't give it to her just to suck on. I let her spend as much time on the breast as she wants. However, I have discovered that sometimes she is wanting to nurse because she is gassy or her stomach is a little upset and the pacifier usually helps her to expel gas and satisfy her sucking needs without adding more milk to her already upset tummy. It works really well for us. I don't force it, but if she ever does take a pacifier, it is with a little help. I have to hold it in her mouth for a couple minutes and then she can do it on her own. Again, I DON"T force it, and if she is trying to spit it out, I let her. You might try this and see if it works! Good luck to you.

    Misty
    Loving my two sweet girls Audrey (7/18/06) and Annie (6/18/09) Baby #3 due to appear 8/5/10

    Feel free to ask me about my successful HBAC , food allergies, cloth diapers, and the joy of having a high-needs, non-sleeping little dear who has grown into a wonderful preschooler.

    Blogging here.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    1,967

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    I forgot to say that I hope you won't let your cranky husband intimidate you into doing what you think is best for baby. There might be other ways to solve the situation if a pacifier won't work for you, and I am sure that the ladies on this forum will have lots of advice for you. I will say that I am married to a wonderfully supportive and unselfish husband who normally has all kinds of stamina and the first few weeks of listening to baby cry and not really being able to participate in breastfeeding were really hard on him. One who I would never expect to be cranky was actually very cranky and it was very frustrating for me. Time and sleep for both parties helped us to work out a solution. I hope that you two can work something out. Taking care of a baby is hard work without all the conflict!

    Misty
    Loving my two sweet girls Audrey (7/18/06) and Annie (6/18/09) Baby #3 due to appear 8/5/10

    Feel free to ask me about my successful HBAC , food allergies, cloth diapers, and the joy of having a high-needs, non-sleeping little dear who has grown into a wonderful preschooler.

    Blogging here.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    138

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    My DD took a soothie when she until she was about two months old. Then she wouldn't take any kind of "binky" at all. It was a rough few weeks, until she found her thumb. Since your DS is so new he probably won't be able to get the thumb in his mouth just yet but maybe he will be a thumb sucker.

    With the cosleeping... I totally feel for you! My DH announced last night that DD had to start sleeping in her bed. Easy for him to say... he's not the one up for middle of the night feedings. It's just easier to have her in bed with me! So I moved a bassinet into our bedroom and put her in there. When she woke up DH was already asleep and I just slipped her in bed with me

    On a personal note... My DH and I are a young couple too. And the first few months with DD were so hard! It hasn't really gotten better until here recently. I just felt like everything was on my shoulders. I don't know if you've ever had those feelings. But anyways... congratulations on breastfeeding... not a lot of ppl our age keep it up for more than a week so kudos to you!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Bryan, Texas
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    4,260

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    Shiloh stopped taking a paci when he found his middle two fingers, but he did really like the avent paci's for a while.
    All over the world there exists in every society a small group of women who feel themselves strongly attracted to giving care to other women during pregnancy and childbirth. Failure to make use of this group of highly motivated people is regrettable and a sin against the principle of subsidiary. ~ Dr. Kloosterman, Chief of OB/GYN, Univ. of Amsterdam, Holland


    **Leslie**

    Mama to:
    Shiloh (5/6/06) Nursed for 13 months and Josephine (7/26/08) Nursed for 23.5 mos Currently nursing my new little firecracker, Finley Catherine, born on the 4th of July!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    57

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    My daughter went through phases with pacifiers. We used the mam ones, but she wouldn't take them for a while, and then liked them again. So, maybe try something again that didn't work before if it's been a while. I know how you feel about not being able to get things done. My daughter has to be held to take naps, and wants to take about four during the day now. Just do what you can while the little one is awake and playing, for a few minutes here or there. Other than that, remember what is important. In ten years, you will look back, and you may not even remember how messy your house was, but you will remember the quality time spent with your child. You'll be sorry if you put too many things in front of that. A messy house never killed anyone, right?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    1,712

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    My dd has tried them all, and still doesn't like them really. She prefers Mommy paci as most breastfed babies do. I am sorry that you are dealing with a cranky hubby. The one that I have had the most luck with is the Gerber Gentle Flex. She will suck it after she has been sucking on a bottle, which she is now taking again after not taking one for about a month. I couldn't find one at a store. I looked at Target, Wal-Mart, Publix, Kroger, and finally just saw some the other day at a Meijer's. I bought some on ebay. And I agree with the PP about the messy house. It can be difficult. I got the activity gym from Baby Einstein out when my dd was about 1 1/2 months. She loved to lay under for about 15 minutes. You can get a lot done in 15 minutes. On days when we had company coming or my clean freak mil, I would transfer her from swing to gym to bouncy seat. Otherwise, I just love to hold her. You could try doing things with her in a front carrier. I used to clean, do dishes, laundry, take out the garbage all with dd in a sling. Check out the baby wearing forrum.
    Good Luck!
    Last edited by Mia'sMom; September 26th, 2006 at 09:19 PM.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    96

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    Have you tried different types of pacifiers, as far as silicone vs. latex, different shapes, etc. My dd will not take the silicone ones. She was very picky and would only take The First Years, Winnie the Pooh pacifiers (LOL!). They are latex and long and straight. I think maybe they were easy for her to hold onto. I found those at Walmart, Target, etc. Now that she's 6 months she'll take the Nuk or Gerber paci's that are curved (the orthodontic ones), but they still have to be latex. Now I'm trying to wean her off them, though. I don't think it'll be too hard since she really hardly ever uses them, except at night. That'll be the challenge, putting her to bed without the paci.

    Good luck! I hope you find one that works for you!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    92

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    Congrats on your new baby, almost 2 m/o already! I'm proud of you for sticking to BFing as such a young woman and for standing up for what you believe is right as a Mama. Good work!

    I agree with PP that housework and all that jazz can wait; spend time with your precious, tiny baby; it really goes so fast and then *poof* it's gone.
    I remember limping to the mudroom 5 days postpartum with a broken tailbone to do some laundry. It took every oz of strength I had and boy, there's nothin' worth that! I was mad at the world that I had to be doing laudry right then and you know what? I didn't have to!!! It sure wasn't worth it then, and it's not now (ok, now that you're all scared I wear my undies inside out, I do keep the laundry pile to a min); just keep some perspective on what's really important!

    My DS wouldn't then and still doesn't sleep w/o a binky. We have always used the Avent ones, he won't use anything else. They actually helped us become successful BFers (at 10 weeks); but that's a totally different story!!
    Good luck, HTH. You're doing a great job...your DH will come around, sometimes men just don't get it!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    23

    Default Re: Pacifiers! Please Help!

    My son likes the Nuk Gerber. He never did like the Soothies. Tried Avent but he likes his Nuk Gerber - silicone pacifier. We were reluctant about giving it to him as well but he sucked our fingers dry. He is able to self soothe with his pacifier. Don't get me wrong he doesn't use it all the time, we do our own soothing for the little one, but he is definately a sucker. Don't feel guilty about it, sometimes you have to do what you have to do.

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