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Thread: Emotionally drained and confused

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    1

    Default Emotionally drained and confused

    Hi there, I'm bran-spanking new here and I'd sure love some assistance.
    My little guy won't nurse right now. He refuses. He's had reflux disease and extreme flatulence.
    My husband and I attended a couples training last week and were asked by the administrators to leave our children elsewhere for the weekend so that we could concentrate just on our relationship.
    My milk supply has been soooo low, so that when we left the baby and his big sister with my in-laws, he had enough "boob-juice" for a bottle and a half. Apparently the days following when he didn't have the breast milk, the flatulence and throwing up stopped.
    Since he won't nurse and my supply has been so low I've been pumping every day and only producing about 8 to10 ounces a day. My nipples are completely thrashed. I've got a wound on one that opens every time I pump and blood keeps staining my bras.
    I don't know what to do. It sounds like my husband doesn't want me to give our little guy breast milk anymore (he's only 11 weeks!) because he and the rest of my in-laws believe it's my milk making him ill or that the combination of the formula and bmilk was the culprit and since he refuses to nurse and I don't have enough milk for him, I should just stopped.
    I'm scared. I'm feeling reeeeeally guilty and I'm really sad.
    Any suggestions?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: Emotionally drained and confused

    Quote Originally Posted by MommaMo
    Hi there, I'm bran-spanking new here and I'd sure love some assistance.

    Welcome! I'm so sorry to hear that you are having a hard time and you ahve made a great first step by coming here. It sounds like you aren't getting the support you need from your family.

    My little guy won't nurse right now. He refuses. He's had reflux disease and extreme flatulence.

    How long has your LO been refusing to nurse? I haven't had experience with reflux or flatulence problems, but it sounds like maybe your LO is sensitive to something in your diet, perhaps?
    Does he take formula out of a bottle also? Does he consume anything else? How long have you been supplementing with formula? Supplementation can start a nasty cycle because your body produces milk on demand, so when there isn't demand, the supply drops. But, you can increase a supply that has dropped!

    My husband and I attended a couples training last week and were asked by the administrators to leave our children elsewhere for the weekend so that we could concentrate just on our relationship.

    I would not recommend spending that much time away from your baby yet.

    My milk supply has been soooo low, so that when we left the baby and his big sister with my in-laws, he had enough "boob-juice" for a bottle and a half. Apparently the days following when he didn't have the breast milk, the flatulence and throwing up stopped.

    This also makes me think that it might be something in your diet that is bothering your baby. Also, the fact that your non-supportive in-laws reported this to you makes me skeptical of the accuracy of this conclusion.

    Since he won't nurse and my supply has been so low I've been pumping every day and only producing about 8 to10 ounces a day.

    Am I correct that you don't BF him at all, but only pump?

    My nipples are completely thrashed. I've got a wound on one that opens every time I pump and blood keeps staining my bras.

    What kind of pump do you have? It sounds like it is really doing a number on your nipples! It could be that the suction is set too high or the breast shield is too small. Try and figure out what is causing the damage.

    I don't know what to do. It sounds like my husband doesn't want me to give our little guy breast milk anymore (he's only 11 weeks!) because he and the rest of my in-laws believe it's my milk making him ill or that the combination of the formula and bmilk was the culprit and since he refuses to nurse and I don't have enough milk for him, I should just stopped.

    It is soooo hard when you don't have the support you need. Is there an LLL group or leader in your area, or a lactation consultant you can contact for extra help? Have you talked to your hubby about being more supportive?

    I'm scared. I'm feeling reeeeeally guilty and I'm really sad.
    Any suggestions?
    I'm sooo sorry you are feeling this way. It is totally understandable, but I hope you will keep trying! There is a LOT of great information on this site about many of the issues you are having, as well as on www.kellymom.com
    HTH!

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

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