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Thread: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    lookingforchange!!
    Posts
    846

    Default Re: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

    We are here, Momma...
    DS just turned 1 yr old yesterday and I've aleady heard it from MIL.
    She thinks I'll nurse him until he's 10...I say WHATEVER!


    We've made it 1 YEAR




    A newborn baby has only three demands. They are warmth in the arms of its mother, food from her breasts, and security in the knowledge of her presence. Breastfeeding satisfies all three. ~Grantly Dick-Read

    Stacey

    Married to DH since 2001
    Mommy to Mikki 2006
    Mommy to Xander 2008

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    17

    Default Re: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

    Thank you so so much ladies! To answer some questions, I am basically getting a lot of pressure from my MIL and some other people, such as co-workers and other mothers I have met...my husband is 100% supportive, and to be honest a little jealous of how close Arlo and I are. As for my MIL, (the main culprit) I feel it is more for her own benefit. She keeps wanting him to spend the night, but it is not going to happen any time soon. I also just realized that all of my frozen back up milk has high levels of lipase and I was so upset that all of my hard work is literally going down the drain, and her only response was "well, looks like you're going to have to wean him". SHe also always brings it up in front of her friends who then start in on me. I have said time and time again "yeah, I am just not ready yet" or "I'll probably wean him until college". it is just the rolls of the eyes and the tsk tsk that wears on me. But you are all right. I need to just keep my cool and keep remembering that this is all for him.

    I am really starting to think it is a generation thing...no one from her generation that I know nursed. None of my aunts or my mother or my husbands aunts or his mom...so maybe I need to keep in mind that maybe they just don't understand. I feel like they look at the breast as simply nutrition. And they don't realize that 3 years is such a short time in the long run...

    Thanks again...ALL of your advice has been most helpful. And I will remember to return to this thread every time I get discouraged!!!

    Thanks mamas...also thanks for all of the encouraging kind words for making it this far...it really was all worth it...and to think it gets better....ahhhh....I can't wait!

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    miles from nowhere
    Posts
    11,086

    Default Re: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

    Would your husband be willing to talk to your MIL? It doesn't sound like she's going to have any interest in being educated about the benefits, so maybe a stern discussion about how it is not a subject that is up for discussion any longer is in order. She might take it better from her son than from you. At least that way she'll know that it is a decision you are both making as parents and it's not just her 'kooky daughter in law.'

    Or next time she brings it up just tell her that if she can't be supportive of your decision to provide her grandson with the absolute best nutrition he can get then she needs to keep her mouth shut about it.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    28

    Default Re: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

    I really like the "pass the bean dip" advice! That's great.

    I have been telling people also when they ask (no negative reactions yet) that I believe that right at the beginning of what seems like it will be bad flu season I can't, in good conscience, stop giving my baby the health and immune benefits that breast milk provides. How can they argue with that??
    Wife of Jacob, our hero
    Mommy of Lilia Grey born September 22nd 2008
    Auntie of Alex, our funny 4th grader!

    Makeup artist, studying to be a Bradley Birth Instructor!

    peaceloving, treehugging : cloth diaper lover!

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    932

    Default Re: Want to continue nursing and feeling pressure...

    I would just try to make it a little more clear to MIL that it's really not a topic that's open for discussion, that you prefer not to talk about it anymore, and then don't let her draw you into any discussions about it. If you don't engage her, then she won't be able to do that. It sounds like you've tried some good answers with the whole "oh till he goes to college" and stuff like that trying to deflect her, but she still continues and draws her friends into it?????

    It sounds like the more subtle tactics aren't working, so if it were me I'd be more direct and firm about telling her it's not up for discussion and you don't appreciate the way she badgers you and also brings her friends into the discussion. Because your BF relationship is a PRIVATE, personal issue between you, your child, and your DH and what she is doing is really rude and uncalled for and none of her business. Don't let her treat you like that mama!

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