Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 46

Thread: Nursing an 8 year old...

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    1,949

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    I was reading an article an Mothering Magazine form a few months back, in Mangolia, a developed country, it is normal no nurse older kids, some were 8 in the article they mentioned!

    Sorry it took so long to get back.

    I still remain neutral as who am I to judge others?

    Also let us not forget that nursing a 2,3 or 4 yo may be the norm for some of us on this board, but for most of our society it is just as bizzare as nursing an 8yo would be!
    Last edited by @llli*dara; October 12th, 2009 at 05:01 AM.
    Mommy of 4,
    3 who I watch over, 1 who watches over all of us

    J- 8/20/05 pumped breastmilk for 11 months due to his cleft lip and palate!

    M- 10/17/07 my precious baby lives forever in her mommys heart

    M- 3/31/09 my special gift, she helps heal her mommy and daddys heart. Nursed for 4 years and 10 days, self weaned the day her baby brother was born!

    E-, new little miracle born 4/11/13, my BIG baby! Born 8.6 at 38 weeks. At 9 weeks nearly 17lbs, at 12 weeks nearly 20lbs, at 6 months nearly 23lbs, at 8 months nearly 25lbs and all from BREASTMILK


  2. #22
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,447

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*dara View Post
    I still remain neutral as who am I to judge others?

    Also let us not forget that nursing a 2,3 or 4 yo may be the norm for some of us on this board, but for most of our society it is just as bizzare as nursing an 8yo would be!
    I don't know. But I am pretty sure you are judging someone about something. If not, if you are really able to always remain neutral you deserve applause.
    It's admirable. I appreciate one able to remain neutral about things. I was simply being honest about how felt. Ambivilence. I felt some good things. I felt some not so good things too. Part of it was what you speak of here. When I thought "Eeeh she's SO BIG." I then thought "that is probably how everyone sees me and DJ right NOW" And I felt empathy for all their disgust and confusion. And then when I saw the girl up in her arms all content later I felt warm joy because that is what watching nursing usually brings me. And like I said, she seems so sane and rational. Much more so than I seem when defending my own position I am sure. SO I found it hard to dismiss or discredit what she said about it.
    And then what I think is I don't want that to be me. Or us. Which I guess is OK because it will sort of inspire me. To work harder to wean. I am so lazing- down-by-the-river about it......
    But that is something else that I consider. And I have considered this as part of my own decisions about when and where I NIP over the years. And that is I have always wanted and hoped that NIP would be inspirational to other mothers. But at some point after a year I felt I needed to really curb it. ESPECIALLY around NEW mothers. Because I didn't want them to think "OMG! Gross! I don't want to be her!" and really work on being done by 6months or a year. Am I sad that in our society we feel pressure to put our boobs away at least in public right at or after the year point? Yes. I am. For sure. But at the same time I think we all as nursing mothers have a fine line we have to walk. When it comes to coaching new mothers along and through. And part of that is about not scaring them away. I feel that in the way of responsibility. Sooo I feel fine about being honest here about my feelings. Even if it means a slight chiding by you in regards to judgment. Because if I feel this way and I am nursing my almost 4 year old, than it's probably safe to say that MOST people who watch this video are probably filled with much stronger negative emotions. Like shock and Repulsion. And so sadly I don't think that overall it helps our cause. I am happy that so many people HERE are far enough along in their own journey to not be judge. That is nice. But the women here are an extraordinary group and don't really represent the population.

    Way too lazy for formula

  3. #23
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    219

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*norasmommy View Post
    It's ok for sanctimonious non-breastfeeders to tell us how long we shouldn't nurse for, though. Right.
    Amen, sista.
    ---Josie

    Proud mommy of 2 boys and a baby girl!

    DS Owen, DOB 10/28/6, 6 lb 4oz, adopted from Guatemala, home forever 8/1/6 (we met him at 4w old! Mommy lived w/him in Guatemala from 5/28/6 till he came home!)

    DS Ian, DOB 8/6/8 via C-sec., 9 lb!
    BF for 22 mo.

    DD born via vbac 11/25/11!

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Toronto, Canada
    Posts
    2,339

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    But that is something else that I consider. And I have considered this as part of my own decisions about when and where I NIP over the years. And that is I have always wanted and hoped that NIP would be inspirational to other mothers. But at some point after a year I felt I needed to really curb it. ESPECIALLY around NEW mothers. Because I didn't want them to think "OMG! Gross! I don't want to be her!" and really work on being done by 6months or a year. Am I sad that in our society we feel pressure to put our boobs away at least in public right at or after the year point? Yes. I am. For sure. But at the same time I think we all as nursing mothers have a fine line we have to walk. When it comes to coaching new mothers along and through. And part of that is about not scaring them away. I feel that in the way of responsibility. Sooo I feel fine about being honest here about my feelings. Even if it means a slight chiding by you in regards to judgment. Because if I feel this way and I am nursing my almost 4 year old, than it's probably safe to say that MOST people who watch this video are probably filled with much stronger negative emotions. Like shock and Repulsion. And so sadly I don't think that overall it helps our cause. I am happy that so many people HERE are far enough along
    in their own journey to not be judge. That is nice. But the women here are an extraordinary group and don't really represent the population.

    Sorry Shelly, my backspace got stuck and I lost the "quote" look of the above part of your post.
    I am curious about your feelings regarding NIP after the year mark. I still nurse Roxie without much thought to where we happen to be. And I'm surprised that you felt pressure to "closet" your nursing relationship (from the public at least) around that year mark. I guess I have always figured that NIP is NIP. By doing it we normalize it, no? I mean, of course my toddler doesn't "need" the calories from nursing as much as she did when she was a newborn, but the comfort and security factor a still there.

    I'm curious as to why you feel that other nursing mothers in particular will judge and view nursing a toddler or older child in public with fear and
    revulsion? Have you had the experience of someone telling you that they are afraid that nursing is like a roller coaster they may not be able to get off of when they need or want to? Do you never NIP anymore?

    Like I said, I'm just curious about this because you are such an advocate for NIP in general.
    Jess

    Mama to my little Roxie Roo, 06/11/08


    April miles for TBTTW: 63

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    84

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    I watched the video and the only thing that came to my mind was "I wonder if this is stressful for the mother at all?", because sometimes BF stresses me out from time to time. Don't get me wrong, I *love* bf my son, but sometimes it gets hard for me. Anyway, I was FURIOUS over the comments on this YouTube link. UGHHHH!!! So I posted my own little comment as follows:

    "This is not gross!! Why is it that only Americans believe in stopping breastfeeding by 1?? OR never starting at all?? Breastfeeding is natural! I am appalled by all of you ppl who say this is sexual and perverted and causing them to be lesbians!! This is a mother's love, pure and gracious. Who are YOU all to judge?!?!"

    This is the business of their family, and those comments made me mad and repulsed at the same time, so I addressed those points that made me especially upset. If you haven't checked it out, you should see...

    Jenn

    Married to my best friend - Feb '07
    Mommy to Gavin - May '09
    Mommy to Adrian - Jan '12
    with a surprise baby April '13


    Being a SAHM is not for the faint of heart!





    8May09: 7lbs 1.9oz
    12Jan12: 7lbs 8oz

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    1,949

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    the only reason I dont judge especially in this case, is casue back in the day I DID!!! I was one of those bresastfeeding SUPPORTERS who thought it was only for nutrition, therefore after a year it is unnecessary! So that was a LOOOONG TIME AGO, before kids, before KNOWLEDGE abut the subject!Since then, I have breastfed and pumped for my own kids, I now feel badly for every thinking that! So I decided to be nonjudgmental towards people who nurse their kids no matter how old they are. Now, I would most likely raise an eyenbrow if the child was a teenager. I would try to remain non judgmental, but I am sure I would raise an eyebrow!

    I also know what it feels like to be judged! I want to homeschool, I cloth diaper and I nurse, I am also a vegetarian for 17 years and into natural foods for my kids, so I get judged ALL THE TIME, so i try real hard to not do it to others, cause I HATE when people question me. I say I do all the above with the best of intentions for my family. I just give the same benefit of the doubt to others as well.

    Just my 2 cents! Everyone has their own thoughts and opinions and I just gave mine!
    Mommy of 4,
    3 who I watch over, 1 who watches over all of us

    J- 8/20/05 pumped breastmilk for 11 months due to his cleft lip and palate!

    M- 10/17/07 my precious baby lives forever in her mommys heart

    M- 3/31/09 my special gift, she helps heal her mommy and daddys heart. Nursed for 4 years and 10 days, self weaned the day her baby brother was born!

    E-, new little miracle born 4/11/13, my BIG baby! Born 8.6 at 38 weeks. At 9 weeks nearly 17lbs, at 12 weeks nearly 20lbs, at 6 months nearly 23lbs, at 8 months nearly 25lbs and all from BREASTMILK


  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,447

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jessruff View Post
    I am curious about your feelings regarding NIP after the year mark. I still nurse Roxie without much thought to where we happen to be. And I'm surprised that you felt pressure to "closet" your nursing relationship (from the public at least) around that year mark. I guess I have always figured that NIP is NIP. By doing it we normalize it, no? I mean, of course my toddler doesn't "need" the calories from nursing as much as she did when she was a newborn, but the comfort and security factor a still there.

    I'm curious as to why you feel that other nursing mothers in particular will judge and view nursing a toddler or older child in public with fear and
    revulsion? Have you had the experience of someone telling you that they are afraid that nursing is like a roller coaster they may not be able to get off of when they need or want to? Do you never NIP anymore?

    Like I said, I'm just curious about this because you are such an advocate for NIP in general.
    It wasn't right at a year. But by the time he was 18months old.....I definitely felt it. And it may be different Abroad. But here there is such accolades about making it a year and then the expectation really IS that you are going to wean. MOST women, even the ones that are educated about the benefits think that way. They think the AAP MINIMUM recommendation is THE lenght of time a child is supposed to nurse. And that the "as long as in mutually beneficial" part is thrown in there so you don't have to go Cold turkey when you wean. Not to give your child another year or two to walk away. I was one of two women in my Mommy and Me class who made it a year. And all the women outside of group I know who breastfeed/fed were done between 13 and 14months. And Have said "You don't want to go much longer because the get aggressive. They pull up your shirt, they ask for it. You don't want that." YOU ask "why not?" And because I made the decision to let him self wean before we were at a year I wasn't swayed by this thinking. BUT since my thinking about breastfeeding WAS dramatically changed by this website and the league, I know how other people thought. And I didn't want people who were holding their new 8week olds to be freaked out by me nursing a toddler. Much the way I was fascinated by this part of the board when I had a baby. I felt like coming down here was like peeping through a hole in the locker room. If not for a conversation that I "listened in on" here by some very very intellectual woman, with Rebecca in her usual style breaking it all the way downs to breastfeeding DUST for me, I don't know when or if I would have turned the corner. I am sure I wouldn't have weaned him at a year. But I don't know that I would have been able to embrace long term nursing the way I have. So I don't want to distract new mothers from the task at hand. Which is to feel confident enough to nurse ANYWHERE. Not worry about WHY I am STILL doing it and start to think about the future. New breastfeeding mothers have ENOUGH to think about. Does that make sense?
    Last edited by @llli*djs.mom; October 12th, 2009 at 05:28 PM.

    Way too lazy for formula

  8. #28

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    DJ's Mom has a point about not wanting to scare off new bf mom's but we really need to be supporting them and showing them that extended nursing is beneficial to baby and mother. There are LLL groups all over this country who offer support for mother's who nurse after 1. We need to mobilize and make sure they know about LLL and they have the ability to make it to LLL meetings. Extended nursing is a private decision between Mother and baby. It works if the family supports extended nursing.

    My little guy is still nursing at 4 1/2. His nursing is less and less. He likes to nurse with his younger sister but other than that it is just his way of checking back in with me if he doesn't feel well or needs extra closeness. I do not have any worries that he will wean. He has been on his way since he was 2 1/2...he is just taking the long road.

    I treasure the nursing days I have with all of my children. If they nurse till 8 so be it!! Nursing saved my daughter's life. Those who are freaked out about extended nursing should listen to the oncology team of doctors who preach the absolute benefits of infant-toddler-youth cancer survival rates because of the blessings of mother's milk. Enough said.
    Alene
    LLL Leader

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,447

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    Alene,
    I am so happy it has saved your daughter. Your story is especially inspirational. However IME even LLL breaks out the toddler meetings. Specifically SO that the new mothers don't get freaked out? Is that a mistake in my thinking? I know we have a separate toddler group from the baby group. Do you think it's for another reason? I always just assumed that it was not to scare off new mothers.

    Way too lazy for formula

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    1,949

    Default Re: Nursing an 8 year old...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*djs.mom View Post
    Alene,
    I am so happy it has saved your daughter. Your story is especially inspirational. However IME even LLL breaks out the toddler meetings. Specifically SO that the new mothers don't get freaked out? Is that a mistake in my thinking? I know we have a separate toddler group from the baby group. Do you think it's for another reason? I always just assumed that it was not to scare off new mothers.
    I had no idea LLL had toddler meetings, as the LLL meetings I go to have moms who nurse todlers right in the same group as those with newborns and everyting inbetween! I have gone to several meetings and they have all had mixed ages of the kids who BF.

    Our groups are quite open about extended BFing and I think that it has HELPED me decide that I will let DD self wean, and will embrace nursing well into toddlerhood I think that if I wasnt exposed to those who extend BFing past a year, that I may not have these feelings!
    Mommy of 4,
    3 who I watch over, 1 who watches over all of us

    J- 8/20/05 pumped breastmilk for 11 months due to his cleft lip and palate!

    M- 10/17/07 my precious baby lives forever in her mommys heart

    M- 3/31/09 my special gift, she helps heal her mommy and daddys heart. Nursed for 4 years and 10 days, self weaned the day her baby brother was born!

    E-, new little miracle born 4/11/13, my BIG baby! Born 8.6 at 38 weeks. At 9 weeks nearly 17lbs, at 12 weeks nearly 20lbs, at 6 months nearly 23lbs, at 8 months nearly 25lbs and all from BREASTMILK


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •