Very fussy baby

[@llli*irys.torres]

Hi ladies! I'm at wit's end here. I think I've cried about twice in less than an hour! My LO is 12 mo and a half, and she's a picky eater, who'd rather latch on than anything in the world, but surely I've been introducing solids since she was about six to seven months and we've been okay. Now, I'm pregnant and my supply has dipped considerably, so I have to keep a strict menu to feed her properly, the problem lies in that as of late, she's been refusing to eat her food, which is made the same way we eat ours! What's worse is that whenever I sit down to eat, she will fuss a great deal and cry at the top of her little lungs until I give her whatever I'm eating. This wouldn't be a problem if she actually ate while I tried to fed her. I've even tried to sit down with her and spoon-fed her, to give her attention while she feeds, but she refuses. She wants to feed herself of my own food, and I'm left with none unless I eat away from her while DH watches her. Another thing is that she's become extremely attached to me, as in she wants to always be sitting on my lap, she follows me to the bathroom and has a fit if I go outside to throw out the trash! When she was a younger baby I could dedicate myself completely to her, but now I'm back in college and I've actually fallen back on schoolwork because of this. I know our nursing relationship has suffered, but I still let her comfort nurse on demand, I take breaks to play w/ her and give her any kind of attention, and she still wants more! DH tries to console her but it's sometimes in vain. I thought of teething pains, but I've given her orajel and tylenol and she still fusses. I know I'm rambling on but, she cries and pushes, I fear she might strain a little limb or get a hernia, which would be horrible! And that happens whenever she doesn't get what she wants, which is often since she likes to dumpster dive or grab stuff she's not supposed to like pennies. This is all very stressfull and I don't need stress since it could harm the other baby I know 12 months is such a tender age to wean and she might be very confused and angry, but I can't do anything about it!

[@llli*number4]

I have a quick suggestion. If she'll only eat off your plate, can you eat off "hers"?

As far as the behaviour/clingyness. Is it new? could it be related to you returning to school?

[@llli*irys.torres]

I CAN'T eat off of hers! She cries and throws a fit!! The clingyness, well she used to be a high needs baby, so she was clingy for the first six months of her life. I would've been lucky if she took more than two naps a day, but she would also do her own stuff once she learned how to move on her own. Now she won't nap for longer than 15 mins once a day, most of them spent on my lap, and since she's bigger, she moves about when on my lap and that isn't so comfortable with a pregnant belly in the middle, she also gets on top of the table and tries to take whatever is there. It's very nerve-wracking especially because whenever i do comfort nurse she puts her little feet on my face to call attention and many times I do respond but others I just need time to do my own things. I guess what I'm getting at is the frequency and insistence of her needs, when all I do is try to satisfy them A more specific question would be what to do to with such a high needs older baby? Oh, and she only watches tv if there is a music video she likes and a new nick show called the fun beat band or something like that.
ETA About me returning to school, my mother is taking care of her now, and she acts high need w/ her too, unless my 3 yo nephew is w/ her and then she focuses on playing with him.

[@llli*sixyearplan]

Why can't you put enough food on your plate for you both to eat together and let her feed herself. That's pretty normal for her to want to self feed and have what you are having.

[@llli*irys.torres]

I don't know if I've expressed this correctly but I cannot touch her plate of food, or she will scream. No matter if there is enough for an army of ppl. And when I give her her own plate (what used to be my own), she'll keep feeding until bored or if I have something for myself. It's really frustrating. I guess I just need support through this phase.

[@llli*sch.mommy]

if you hold her in your lap at the table, will she eat off of your plate?

[@llli*janelle525]

I understand you are going through a lot with your DD, I don't have experience with a toddler, I just wanted to offer support. . And YaY for giving your LO the best (bf) for a whole year! Is 1 yr too young to start gentle discipline? I'm not talking like spanking and yelling, I'm talking maybe firm talks when she does something that is wrong? If you have to give her all the attention she is always going to want it, I've been researching a lot about this... child-centeredness will not promote independence, it promotes dependence. I'm not saying ignore her needs, but once a child starts walking they should follow by example of how to behave, could there be something else going on? Is she just so used to having all of your time? When she wants something do you always give it to her? Yes, I think children can get very upset when they find out there are rules. I don't know if any of that helps, I am still trying to figure out why western cultures have such high needs/wants kids, in third world countries it is not like this.

So what have you tried at mealtimes? do you even get to eat???? Your LO needs to get that Mama needs to eat too! If she cries yells at you don't give in! Don't let her manipulate! Yes she is still young, but she does not rule the family!

[@llli*irys.torres]

I guess be have to be more strict w/ her, she's been exclusively w/ us for so long, and she our whole world. It's just so frustrating and saddening to have this problem, and sometimes I beat myself up for leading her on, but now things have changed in our lives and she has to understand this. I just think she is too young to realize this and that's why she acts up and throws a fit. My mom is a little more disciplining, and I often find myself having to do so too. Leave it to me to create such a stubborn lil' one! When I talk to her about not doing something she throws whatever toy she has to the floor and rants! It's very tiring, is all. But thanks for the suggestions! I'll definetly look more into it.