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Thread: Baby refuses...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    2

    Unhappy Baby refuses...

    I cannot get my one week old daughter to latch on for the life of me. After trying I usually just cry... I want whats best for her and I know I have adequate milk supply for her but she just will not take it. I do not believe I have flat or inverted nipples (meaning when they get hard they protrude) but they do not seem to stay hard for long. Which seems to make it hard for her to find them. She roots around my breast searching but no success on latching on. She will every now and then for about 2 sucks and then lets go before she can even let my milk come out. When I pump I am pumping about an ounce to an ounce and a half per breast. So I know this is enough for her. They also leak all the time so I know it is not hard for her to get it out. I have tried a nipple shield and she will not take to that as well. She will however drink breastmilk from a regular bottle. I have even tried pumping a little bit to swell the nipple before feeding... No prevail. I do have very large breasts size is 44 G and my nipples are also very large, not the part that protrudes but the aereola (sp?) It is about 3 inches wide. I just do not understand this and I am beginning to be discouraged. Has anyone had these problems? How were they resolved and were you able to continue to breastfeed? How diligent did you have to be, and did you suplement with formula? How long until they finally latched on? Please... Any encouragement or advice is greatly appreciated.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    are you working with a lc or a lll leader?
    heres how to find a leader near you
    http://www.lalecheleague.org/WebIndex.html

    how are her wet diapars?
    And poops?
    any bottles or pasifiers?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    1,168

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    I'm sorry you're having a tough time with a non-latching baby. It does happen sometimes, but with the right information and support, eventually the baby will latch and nurse.

    The key thing in the meantime is to 1) keep the baby fed (so it's wonderful that you are expressing milk and giving it to her -- track her diapers to make sure she's getting enough); 2) keep your supply up -- so make sure you are pumping every 2-3 hours, for a total of 10-12 times per 24-hour-period, including at night, with a hospital-grade double-electric pump); 3) work with someone who is trained in lactation support -- an IBCLC or a local LLL Leader, or even better both of them.

    Don't worry about the size of your breasts, areolas, nipples, etc. Your nipples don't need to be hard for your baby to latch onto them, although there are some little tricks and tips that a Leader or IBCLC can show you once she sees what is going on. One thing that often helps a non-latching baby's nursing instincts emerge more strongly is lots of skin-to-skin contact with momma, so keep her in just a diaper and wear her against your chest as much as you can. A warm bath together (with an adult helper nearby for safety) can also help.

    Here's one of my favorite links for encouragement through this rough start!

    http://www.wiessinger.baka.com/bfing...e/babyget.html

    --Rebecca

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    2

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    Thank you for your replies. Her diapers seem normal to me meaning she needs to be changed atleast every 2 hours. Usually more like 1 1/2. I have not been counting her dirty diapers because there was a lot of them. I assume she is having between 6 and 10 dirty dirty ones and probably 5 that are only wet. She seems to have bowels alot more often then urine. I am not working with anyone on this issue at the moment. I don't know I guess I am a little shy because my sister has a really good friend that is a LLL here in town and offered to ask her to come over but I told her not to. I am a little embarrassed that it just did not come naturally like I thought it would. I am currently supplementing with bottles of formula, and yes she takes a passifier. The nurses at the hospital did that to her... Both bottle and passifier while I was being stitched up from emergency C-section even though they had strict orders not to. I just feel as though the days that go by that she is not latching on are washing my chances of breastfeeding away. I feel like every time I give her a bottle I am failing more and more. It is really frustrating emotionally for me right now. And to have her get so upset and push me away just tears me up.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    Please, please allow your friend and her LLL mom to help you!! Nothing can take the place of in-person help. Just so you know, although the instinct and ability to BF surely do come naturally, the “how-to” is definitely more of a learned art. I needed a lot of help when I was starting out. So, please get someone to come over, help with latch and talk about what you can do to get back on track.

    I am sorry that you are so down about this. It is so unfortunate that the nurses in the hospital did not respect your wishes. However, many if not most moms get off to a less-than-ideal start. You really can still do this!

    Even if she won’t latch onto your nipple, and you have to give her bottles, stop giving her formula and give her EBM! Your breasts need a lot of stimulation to establish a good milk supply, so pump often as a pp suggested, and keep offering the breast. Supplementing with formula leads to less milk production, which leads to more supplementing, and so on.

    Above all, I can’t say enough how important it is to get some personal assistance. You can do this for your baby!

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,404

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    Quote Originally Posted by sugar_mama
    Thank you for your replies. Her diapers seem normal to me meaning she needs to be changed atleast every 2 hours. Usually more like 1 1/2. I have not been counting her dirty diapers because there was a lot of them. I assume she is having between 6 and 10 dirty dirty ones and probably 5 that are only wet. She seems to have bowels alot more often then urine. I am not working with anyone on this issue at the moment. I don't know I guess I am a little shy because my sister has a really good friend that is a LLL here in town and offered to ask her to come over but I told her not to. I am a little embarrassed that it just did not come naturally like I thought it would. I am currently supplementing with bottles of formula, and yes she takes a passifier. The nurses at the hospital did that to her... Both bottle and passifier while I was being stitched up from emergency C-section even though they had strict orders not to. I just feel as though the days that go by that she is not latching on are washing my chances of breastfeeding away. I feel like every time I give her a bottle I am failing more and more. It is really frustrating emotionally for me right now. And to have her get so upset and push me away just tears me up.
    DON'T GIVE UP! And you probably are making the problems worse w/ formula! Not only do bottles cause latch issues because it's easier to get milk out of one than the breast but it's probably messing up your supply because you body is not getting the signal to make milk everytime you baby needs to eat!!!
    Get the LLL that you have access to over to help you ASAP!! You are probably suffering from some baby blues. The BEST thing you can do for your nursing relationship right now is get one on one help! And that is what is BEST for your baby for sure!! Good luck! Please keep us posted!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    1,168

    Default Re: Baby refuses...

    Quote Originally Posted by sugar_mama
    I am a little embarrassed that it just did not come naturally like I thought it would.
    Oh, I wish I could give you a big, gentle hug right now.

    Did you know that the most popular book by LLL is titled _The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding_?

    Womanly ART. It's an art, a combination of learned skills and natural gifts. Women around the world throughout history have passed this art down to other women. Nobody figures it out all by themselves, any more than someone who has never seen a bicycle can just climb onto one and go.

    Call the friend and get the LLL Leader's phone number, and call the Leader. She'll probably be able to help you in ways that words on a message board can't right now.

    Keep us posted -- I'll want to know how you and your sweet baby are doing.

    --Rebecca

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