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Thread: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    222

    Default How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    Hello ladies

    I have some questions:
    1. Did any of you find yourselves in a situation where you had to be away from your baby overnight?
    2. How did your husband or partner deal with this issue?
    3. How did he deal with the warming the milk?
    4. How well was his method of putting the baby back to sleep work?

    Please detail what your husband or partner did. I may be faced with this soon and am looking for some input.

  2. #2

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    Many mothers find that they have to leave baby overnight. Obviously, it's not best, but for some, there is no other option.

    The simplest way to warm the milk is to run warm tap water into a cup or glass, then put the milk into there to warm.

    Most families that I have known that have done have been co-sleeping. Daddy warmed the bottle, then went back to bed to feed baby. When baby crashed, they both just stayed in bed. He can wash bottles in the morning!
    Shannon
    LLL Leader

    Protect your privacy online; don't use your full name. Click My Alias at the top left corner.

    I'm horrible at html and encoding links, so I apologize in advance for all the long links!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    32

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    i haven't had to be away over night, but i am back to work now and dh is a sahd. he was nervous at first, but was very active in taking care of ds when i was on maternity leave. ds had trouble latching, so dh gave bottles of ebm early, so that was not a problem. a lot of nights we put ds down together (feed, change diaper, read stories, and rock). sometimes i rock, sometimes dh rocks. i think you should have your husband "shadow" you for a while to see how you do things, then let him do them himself while you're home so that he can ask questions and you can observe. (make sure you teach him about bm storage and handling as well)
    also, trust your husband. he may do things differently or have a harder time with it than you would, but he's not going to hurt the baby. i know its tough to trust someone else with your child (even if it is your husband...) you are probably like me in thinking that no one can take as good care of your baby as you, but the baby will be fine.
    finally, make it clear to dh that you don't want any phone calls saying things like "the baby is crying, what do i do?" let him know that you will not know whats wrong or how to fix it from however far away you are and that it will only cause you to worry. if he thinks something is really wrong with the baby, then call the doctor.
    try to relax and enjoy the full night of sleep you'll be able to get!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    195

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    This happened pretty quickly for us because DS was born in March, then when my maternity leave was up it was time for DH, a teacher, to stay home with DS for the summer.

    Let me tell you, I was pretty nervous about how they'd get along. I knew my husband was great with the baby, but I was used to being there. The first week or so the baby was somewhat fussy because he was used to mommy being there. But we're fortunate as he didn't refuse the bottle or anything.

    Long story short, daddy and baby son had a long wonderful summer together. My husband came to know baby's routine better than I did, which made me kind of jealous sometimes. They became very close and now that schools started it was hard for husband to go back to work.

    As for your questions:
    1. Did any of you find yourselves in a situation where you had to be away from your baby overnight? I personally haven't had that experience so I'll let someone else comment.
    2. How did your husband or partner deal with this issue?
    3. How did he deal with the warming the milk? I tried and tried to get DH to warm the bottles in a cup of hot water. But he ended up doing what was quickest (and fortunately not the best) by using the microwave. This worried me but DS continues to progress well and gain lots of weight so maybe it will work out ok.
    4. How well was his method of putting the baby back to sleep work? His routine for putting baby down for naps was to watch for the signs of sleepiness, then put baby in the swing and he'd fall asleep pretty quick. Once asleep he'd move baby to the crib. Of course this is one of those things where people fear that the baby will get a dependency on movement to fall asleep. But now he's outgrown his swing and we can just lay him in the crib and he's fine.

    hth!
    Tricia
    ***********
    Mommy to William, 4/29/09, 7 lbs 13 oz, 21 inches.
    Mommy to Evan, 3/18/06. 7 lbs 3 oz, 21 1/4 inches.
    Nursed both boys to 14 months
    Birth Doula
    Wisconsin!

    ***********

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    222

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    Thanks for the reply. I am just about to put the swing away too.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    I am not trying to be a downer-microwaved BM is still better than formula, I would think-but one really should not heat BM in the microwave because it kills most of the antibodies that are so great for baby.
    I know from my DH and others that have taken care of my kids that it is a pain to warm up the bottle while baby is crying. But, if the caregiver can pick up on hunger signals prior to crying that would help. At night, this might make co-sleeping an attractive option because your DH will probably wake up when your LO does and be able to put the bottle in water right away.

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    65

    Default Re: How did Huband deal with Baby While Away?

    I have some questions:
    1. Did any of you find yourselves in a situation where you had to be away from your baby overnight?
    Not overnight but I work evenings and am rarely home before 12-12:30 and DS goes to bed around 9

    2. How did your husband or partner deal with this issue?
    Surprisingly well, I had 12 wks off and taught him the basics on infant soothing, swaddling worked really well. Now that he's older we've stopped swaddling so it's more like feeding and putting down, I'm trying to talk DH into following my bedtime routine which is 2 books, feeding and down awake. We'll see what happens tonight.

    3. How did he deal with the warming the milk?
    Hmm, just fine, he used to run it under warm tap water, now DS takes it cold from the fridge (keep offering it colder and colder, makes life much easier!) so he only has to warm it if it's frozen

    4. How well was his method of putting the baby back to sleep work?
    Perfectly, after a few hard nights he started a routine of swaddle, feed, rock and watch some Dukes of Hazard while he feeds. I always come home to a sleeping baby. He's only woken up after being in bed once or twice and DH has fed/rocked him those times and it's worked. I will say that DH does not want me to go to night shift because he doesn't want to get up with him at 5:30/6 am! and that DS typically sleeps through from 9-6 and then eats and back to sleep until 7ish. I have a coworker who worked nights and coslept and she said her DS slept better on the nights she worked ? because he didn't smell lunch?

    Please detail what your husband or partner did. I may be faced with this soon and am looking for some input.[/QUOTE]
    Margaret and
    DS 2/06 nursed x1yr
    and DD 3/08, so far so good!

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