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Thread: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

  1. #1
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    Angry Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's


    Today I feel like I made a big mistake I felt so horrible for allowing my little girl to be vaccinated. This was only my 3 rd visit to the pediatrician since coming home from the NICU. I tried asking more questions and the doctor kind of switched things on me and made me feel like I was a bad mother for even thinking about not giving her the vaccines. I feel like since have such an early preemie the Docs act like everything is necessary for her to take and if not than I'm leaving her to get sick. She has told me that the flu shots are next and I just don't feel comfortable going through with this anymore. Even after mentioning that there have been links to vaccines and disorders she said that they have all been studied and there are no ties to vaccines and any disorders in children.

    Not to mentions when I asked her about when I could fully breastfeed her she looked at me as if I had five heads. First I ask how long she would need the 30 cal ( Enfacare and oil added to my breastmilk, YUK!) since I don't feel comfortable giving that to her for too long. She said Oh she'll need that for a long time, then she'll need Neosure for a year. So i said what about breastfeeeding her I can only do it twice a day now. She said well then just give her Neosure after, I said what just formula you mean, she said yes! I don't ever want her to be on formula, I say. At this point I realize she is disregarding my desire to give her just breastmilk. She said to me then, what are you options? ..I fumbled over my words and said pump for a year, confused. Why was she putting me in this position to ask me and second guess myself. Then she said well you'll have to Pump then. I left the office with my upset baby and in tears from her shots and more confused than ever.

    Can I not continue with the Vax schedule at this point? Who has had this experience? How About the 30 cal recipe for breastmilk and the Neosure which I haven't used at this point. Has anyone used these or been told to use them?

    I think I need a new pediatrician even though she is supposedly great with preemies. I just don't feel like I did the right thing and i was persuaded to believe well your baby is a preemie she needs these things like vax, and flu shots and formula......why???? Help Sorry for rambling but I'm so upset right now....and my husband thinks this is all to much for a little baby's body to handle at once.

    (She is 6lbs 8 oz today and was born at 1lbs 4 oz for reference of where she is at. Her corrected age now is 1 month but she is 4 months from when she was born.)
    Proud Mommy to a 25 wk Preemie born April 18, 2009, at 1lb 4 oz, Came home August 6, 2009 at 5 lb 4 oz 4oz defying all the odds, growing and strong on Mamas Milk!!!


  2. #2
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    have you talked with your local leader?
    Going to a local meeting might help you feal more comfidant in breastfeeding.
    And just a big

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Sorry you had a bad experience! It is really hard with preemies.

    When you say that you can only breastfeed her 2 times a day now, is that because you need to add the fortifier to your breastmilk the other times? Are you giving it to her in bottles or is she being tube-fed at all?

    How long has she been home from the hospital? She's gained 4 lbs 4oz since birth - how much of that has she gained since she's been home?

    I'm thinking the reason your pediatrician is saying she needs to have the fortifier added is because, from my understanding, preemies - especially born as early as your little one, need extra calories. My son's neonatologists said studies have shown you can't give a preemie enough calories so that's why the fortifier is so important. First they told me I'd have to fortify my breastmilk for half of his feedings a day, then they said at least 2 bottles a day, and when it was time for him to come home they said I didn't have to add any at all. He was gaining weight really well. Once we took him home, his pediatricians were really concerned with me wanting to phase out the bottles so I rented a baby scale from a local pharmacy (Target sells them now though) and weighed him before and after each nursing session and supplemented only if he didn't take about 2oz from me. I slowly phased them out until we were down to about 3 bottles a day and then I just cut those out and nursed him often to make sure he was getting enough. I weighed him every night and kept track of it and showed the pediatricians and they relaxed because he continued to gain weight really well. I also worked with lactation consultants for the first month after he came home, going in weekly to check how he was doing. He has been home for 5 months now and has gained over 11 lbs.

    I recommend you renting/buying a baby scale and using that to do test weights before and after each feeding and keeping track of her weight daily. Could you find an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant to work with you? And I would also suggest asking to meet with her pediatrician and talk to her about the whole breastfeeding and supplementing thing. Explain that you want her on breastmilk only and would like to exclusively breastfeed her and find out why she feels you need to fortifiy all/some of her feedings. Tell her you want to understand this and do what's best for your daughter and you don't believe that's formula. About the vaccines - if you want to do them but don't want to do as many at a time, you could look at Dr Sear's delayed vaccine schedule and talk to her about that.

    Oh, and I recommend joining this group. http://www.preemie-l.org/
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  4. #4
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Your baby has defied many odds by making it this far and the doctors want to do what they can to make sure she continues to thrive. I think that the doctor should have been more open to what you were saying and maybe you should make another appt with her to just discuss these issues. You know like a really well appt. But also don't forget that with flu season is RSV season. The flu is deadly especially for preemies that were as early as yours.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    I am Kate
    Wife to Jason
    Mom to Aubrey 4/06 queen
    Mom to Nathan 5/08 Relactated for him and he got EBM for a year
    Mom to Jack 8/11

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*aubreynathanmommy1 View Post
    Your baby has defied many odds by making it this far and the doctors want to do what they can to make sure she continues to thrive. I think that the doctor should have been more open to what you were saying and maybe you should make another appt with her to just discuss these issues. You know like a really well appt. But also don't forget that with flu season is RSV season. The flu is deadly especially for preemies that were as early as yours.
    i think your pedi was really insensitive to your feelings about all of this. my DD was no where near as early as yours, but we did get the RSV shots because i work at a daycare and i knew she would be open to those germs. it is a hard decision to make and really it should be done with your dr and if she isn't willing to sit down and at least hear what you have to say, then you should consider someone else. GL


    Tina - mom of Addison Belle
    12/11/07
    5lbs 13oz - 18in



    and my VBAC ~ Olivia Grace
    9/12/09
    6lbs 8z - 18.5in

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Sorry mamma!

    Maybe you should start to consider a new pediatrician who is more open to listening to what YOU want for your baby.

    How old will your lo be when she wants to give the flu shot? Dont they have to be at least 6 months old to receive it?


    I'm Laura, mamma of 2

    5-27-06

    8-30-08

    We love and

    We have been nursing for over 2 years now!

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Firstly, well done on getting your little one home, and gaining weight!! Still on breast milk. That's awesome for one born so early.

    I can totally understand the concerns about vaccinating one so little. I don't know what the vaccination schedule is where you are, so can't really comment on that. But in NZ where I am, they get them at 6 weeks, 12 weeks, 5 months, 15 months and 4 years.

    I was nervous when we got my DD's 6 weeks vaccinations, this was when she was at 36 weeks gestation. But it was totally up to us to decide whether we wanted to do it or not, so we didn't have the pressure it sounds like you did.

    The doctors do like to seriously suggest that prem babies get their vaccinations as they are more suceptible to things because of the prematurity, and illness can be very dangerous for them, but it should still be your decision, and I know of people who have delayed the vaccinations because they don't feel their baby is ready yet.

    As Jenniebean has said regarding the fortifying the milk, there are reasons for this, and it won't last forever, but maybe you need to find a better pediatrician that can explain things you need to know?

    We never had to fortify our milk. Don't know if it's not done here, as none of the other babies in NICU when our DD was there had theirs fortified either. All we were given when we came home was an iron supplement, which we used for about a month till it ran out. But our DD wasn't as early as your baby, so different situation.

    Also, Jenniebean's suggestion about renting/buying the scales is a great idea. It gives you the confidence to know that they're taking in enough milk if you decide to transition to fully breastfeeding, as it can be very hard to know when you've been so used to measuring out their feeds to tube or bottle feed, to then take the leap of faith to EBF.

    I don't see any reason, based on what you've said, why you can't transition to EBF.
    Alison, mummy to Erin
    Born @ 30 weeks, 2nd July 2008, 3lb 11oz, fully breastfed

    cloth nappy wearing bub.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    WOW thank you all for your responses,

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jenniebean5 View Post
    Sorry you had a bad experience! It is really hard with preemies.

    When you say that you can only breastfeed her 2 times a day now, is that because you need to add the fortifier to your breastmilk the other times? Are you giving it to her in bottles or is she being tube-fed at all?

    How long has she been home from the hospital? She's gained 4 lbs 4oz since birth - how much of that has she gained since she's been home?

    Oh, and I recommend joining this group. http://www.preemie-l.org/
    Yes I am breastfeeding only twice a day because I have to fortify her milk to get "enough" calories in her. She was given bottles in the hospital and they said that, that is the only way she would be sent home if she could take all bottles just in case she couldn't breast feed well since she was so little. She did have an NG tube to feed her when she was to tired and until she could take either 2 breastfeeding and the rest all bottle through out the day before she came home. Other than that I asked about the supplemental tube feeding and they didn't use that method since I asked and I would of had to by one on my own and work with it at home. Which I am considering now, but unsure of its use. The hospital was very breastfeeding friendly in many ways providing pumping rooms and spprt with lactation consultants, but they also recommended due to her extreme prematurity to fortify from the beginning and did.

    At this point she has been home from August 6th, making it 3 weeks and has gained from 5lbs 4oz to 6lbs 8oz so about 1lb 2 oz in 3 weeks.

    Thankyou for the website, and maybe I could try looking for a scale I used to do that in the hospital when i breastfed her.

    Just like you mentioned that you were able to phase out into EB I was hoping to do the same and figure out how from this point we could work on it and what my doctors stance was and basicaly I go the well it seems your are tired of pumping so give her formula which felt like a slap in the face the way she said it. She didn't make any suggestions or what if she gains well we could try this in the future. NO NO support just shutup take it and pump or your giving her formula speech. I was taken back.


    ooligator Our vax schedule is 2m-ths 4mths 6 mths 12 mth, and yes I was prepared to give her the RSV and flu shot since it is highly recommended for a premmie, although I haven't had any flu shots in years probably since I was 12 yrs old.

    I'm curious to know why and what are the results of just giving breastmilk on preemies this early I heard that the Docs started because of studies found that the babies grew better.

    mammaof2, aubreynathanmommy1, knm626 yes The doctor defintely could have approached my questions with more consideration adn been open to more discussion and if short on time told me to set up a time where we could talk but i realized she is the type of doc that seems to be like I am the professional I am qualified. I am asking around for other preemie docs in the area sicne there are many in my city and I live with 5 minutes of the major hospitals. T thought of setting up an appt solely for questions but I'm not sure its cgoing to fix the uncomfortableness that has now become worse.

    andreafromohio Thank you for the suggestionI almsot forgot to, I actually was in touch with a leader before she was even born and while I was in the hospital, although we only exchanged 3 emails they helped me at that stage of the game. I will email her again see if I can recieve some support that is more personal rather than medical.
    Last edited by @llli*lalalime-mama; August 28th, 2009 at 07:25 PM.
    Proud Mommy to a 25 wk Preemie born April 18, 2009, at 1lb 4 oz, Came home August 6, 2009 at 5 lb 4 oz 4oz defying all the odds, growing and strong on Mamas Milk!!!


  9. #9
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    [QUOTE=@llli*lalalime-mama;770162]The hospital was very breastfeeding friendly in many ways providing pumping rooms and spprt with lactation consultants, but they also recommended due to her extreme prematurity to fortify from the beginning and did.

    It is so awesome that the hospital was breastfeeding friendly! I'm am SO impressed that you are breastfeeding her 2 times a day - I'm sure you know the odds of pumping enough milk, let alone breastfeeding a 25weeker, aren't in your favor. You're doing awesome! Are those lactation consultants available for appointments now that you're discharged? They can be really helpful.

    At this point she has been home from August 6th, making it 3 weeks and has gained from 5lbs 4oz to 6lbs 8oz so about 1lb 2 oz in 3 weeks.

    So that's about 5oz per week and I *think* the average for a young breastfed baby is 4-8oz per week. So that's something for you to consider and think about as you think about weaning her off the fortifier.

    Thankyou for the website, and maybe I could try looking for a scale I used to do that in the hospital when i breastfed her.

    I'm curious to know why and what are the results of just giving breastmilk on preemies this early I heard that the Docs started because of studies found that the babies grew better.

    The website I mentioned might be able to give you info. about studies that have been done. If you have a chance, post on there and ask for studies on fortifying or not fortifying breastfed preemies. Or if you'd like me to, let me know and I'll ask on there.

    Just like you mentioned that you were able to phase out into EB I was hoping to do the same and figure out how from this point we could work on it and what my doctors stance was and basicaly I go the well it seems your are tired of pumping so give her formula which felt like a slap in the face the way she said it. She didn't make any suggestions or what if she gains well we could try this in the future. NO NO support just shutup take it and pump or your giving her formula speech. I was taken back.

    I didn't really get any help from doctors though - my son went to a pediatrican's office where there were 5 doctors and we saw them all within the first few weeks he was home and only one of them said I could try giving a few less bottles as long as I was going to weigh him each day and bring him in there for weekly weight checks. She was a woman and said she nursed her children too. The other doctors all acted like your pediatrican did - like I was crazy for not "wanting" to pump all the time and for wanting to nurse him instead. One of them said "what do you have against bottles anyways?" And I said "you've obviously never pumped (he was a guy). It's not about being against bottles but rather not wanting to pump." But again, my son wasn't being supplemented with fortifier at that point. So your situation is different. And your baby was born 5 weeks earlier than mine.

    Maybe you could try to find some research on benefits of fortifying and for how long it's needed and then see how you feel. I totally understand your desire to soley breastfeed your daughter, but you have a delicate situation here. After you gather some info., you might be able to talk with your pediatrican again or feel that you need to find a new one.

    In my experience, I have found that asking doctors for advice hasn't gotten me all that far - it works much better when I research things myself and then discuss things with them.

    Let me know if there's anything I can do to help - post questions on the other boards or anything else. By the way, I see your in Boston - I grew up very close to there - Marlboro.
    Last edited by @llli*jenniebean5; August 28th, 2009 at 08:27 PM.
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


  10. #10
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    Default Re: Very upset at Pedi for my 25 wkr on BFing and VAX's

    Thank you for the advice jenniebean5, I am very much into doing my own research but again I have never been under these circumstances. Its ture what you say with asking doctors for advice, it doesn't ever seem like enough info or what you even want to here. They have rules and charts to plot and sometimes don't see beyond the medical case to the person. I'll be sure to contact you in case I don't have time to locate the studies on the site.

    Pumping is not the easiest thing in the world and let me tell you I pumped more than some mothers in the NICU because my lactation consultants kept saying your baby is very early and odds are against you so make sure you stay on a pumping schedule to keep up supply. They even congratulated me that we never ran out of milk to give her any formula, as many mothers did. I reached about 1300 ml in a day of about 8-9 pumps not including the times I breastfed her twice. SO in all I had to buy a chest freezer to fit all the extra frozen milk. I guess I was so worried about formula I became a little driven. I probably will have frozen milk when I decide to wean, but I wanted to be able to breastfeed.

    Bottles aren't the enemy, they just don't make it easy to breast feed her. Some people/doctors even say oh nipple confusion doesn't exist, maybe its not confusion. The babies are smart they say this bottle thing is instant gratification, but the breast, you have to suck a little to get it out. My girl at this point has only been able to latch twice to my bare nipple with out nipple shield and that is also hard emotionally but i keep trying. Hopefully when she gets bigger she might finally be able to go ahead with out the shield. I guess that is what doctors don't get, the mothers are under lots of stress to make sure there babies reicieve pumped milk and in the long run I feel like I'm missing out on the ease of breastfeeding. No pumping and all its parts and cleaning, no bottles, washing or preparing, heating, sanitizing..... Just plain old mommy i'm hungry and there you go on my breast.

    I am so proud of my girl for even breastfeeding as well as she has on the shield since again I know the odds are against me for her prematurity. We'll keep chugging on, for now, but the pumping is taking its toll on my nipples and breast. I have had very sore and red nipples and discoloration and shoulder and back pain from the positions of pumping, my nerves in my breast sometimes send shooting pains but I go through the motions of soothing my discomfort in the hope that someday I can actually feed her with out any contraptions.
    Proud Mommy to a 25 wk Preemie born April 18, 2009, at 1lb 4 oz, Came home August 6, 2009 at 5 lb 4 oz 4oz defying all the odds, growing and strong on Mamas Milk!!!


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