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Thread: I feel violated...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    6,562

    Angry I feel violated...

    So, my office door is not a normal door, it slides across and there is no way to lock it. I put a hook and eye latch on it to make sure that people would have to actually wait until I responded before opening the door. Yesterday when I had just finished pumping, a man was knocking very loudly on the door, tried to open it,and then ripped it open so hard that he pulled the eye thing out of the wall and damaged the drywall.

    I screamed at him and he was very defensive and acting like he had done nothing wrong, that it was all MY FAULT. He said that I should have put a sign. If a lock didn't stop him, how would a sign?

    Anyway, I put a curtain up and am hoping that I will be able to pump milk today. My manager told me to contact facilities to see if they can do something to lock my door.

    AARGH!! What a way to start the week.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    What a jerk! I'm sure he was more embarrassed than you though, if it makes you feel any better. Some people get defensive when they know they screwed up, but won't admit it. I'm glad your manager seems reasonable about the situation!

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: I feel violated...

    It could have been a lot worse too - I could have had the ladies hanging out. I would have probably thrown something at him then

    I'm hoping I can get a real lock, but the curtain makes me feel better.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    I have been walked in on by an older guy here at my work with the girls out!

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    6,562

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    Wow, I'm sorry. What did you do?
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    Said, "I'm busy!" and he quickly shut the door. Afterward he apologized profusely and said he was so embarrassed. I told him it was not a big deal-it was an accident because he knocked first and I told him I was busy but he apparently thought I said "Come in" or something. I have no lock on my door either.
    If he had been pissy and blamed me, like what happened with you, I would have been mad!

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    2,349

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    That's terrible! People just don't think...

    I'm glad you have a supportive manager, & good luck getting a lock so that you can relax. Until then, maybe a chair under the knob?
    Imma to AA, born at home 11/12/07 , juggling , working, APing , cloth diapering , - and . I'm done - yay!

    http://bf.lilypie.com/KmpEm6.png

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    SoCal
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    Default Re: I feel violated...

    after being walked in on while pumping I started using a hooter hider over the boobs and pump parts

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    6,562

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*imma2nonstopaa View Post
    That's terrible! People just don't think...

    I'm glad you have a supportive manager, & good luck getting a lock so that you can relax. Until then, maybe a chair under the knob?
    We don't even have knobs - it's a hanging door on a sliding bar, kind of like a closet door. People around here like to joke about them being horse stall doors.

    I am glad to have a good manager. He is a man, but he's very sensitive and I think his wife and friends went through this 15 to 20 years ago. It sure helps! A female manager told me to go to HR, which I would have done if my manager was not helpful. I don't think it's necessary though, since he's working with me to find a solution.
    Tracie

    Mommy to
    Lilah 10/08 nursed 25 months
    Beatrix 01/11 nursed 30 months

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    2,349

    Default Re: I feel violated...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommy2lilah View Post
    I am glad to have a good manager. He is a man, but he's very sensitive and I think his wife and friends went through this 15 to 20 years ago. It sure helps! A female manager told me to go to HR, which I would have done if my manager was not helpful. I don't think it's necessary though, since he's working with me to find a solution.
    That sounds smart to me - since he is helpful, it would probably hurt his feelings & damage your relationship if you went over his head. It's good to remember as a backup, though.

    Let us know how things work out!
    Imma to AA, born at home 11/12/07 , juggling , working, APing , cloth diapering , - and . I'm done - yay!

    http://bf.lilypie.com/KmpEm6.png

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