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Thread: Past 18 months: why?

  1. #11
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    Mar 2006
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    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by pipsmom

    My mother (and others) says that babies generally loose interest around 13-15 months.

    I'm also not sure I want to put my body through the fatigue of nursing while pg and we want to think about that once DS is a little over a year.

    Doesn't it complicate getting pregnant again? Make it harder and more tiring? And aren't you exhausted enough from nursing a newborn round the clock? Is it really worth adding a toddler to those painful, tired boobs? I really can't see myself nursing two at the same time, so shouldn't the first one be weaned early enough that he doesn't resent the new baby?
    My son was still interested around 13-15 months, but the length of a session was decreased to some extent, but he still nursed frequently. I suspect he would still be nursing had I not dried up due to pregnancy, actually.

    Nursing does not have to complicate getting pregnant again. If you are already cycling, then you should be able to conceive. If you aren't (as I was not at a year), then it might be harder. We had to drop night feeding entirely for me to cycle, and we conceived on the next ovulation. DS was about 14 months old when I got pregnant again.

    The biggest problem I had with being pregnant and nursing was the SEVERE nipple soreness. I have a very high pain tolerance, but I would sorta dread nursing sessions because it hurt a lot. Made me, Miss Natural Childbirth of Enormous Babies, want to cry. Not all women have that problem.

    I also lost my supply pretty early, and I'm just now, at 35 weeks, leaking some colostrum. That's probably why he stopped nursing; it was all about the milk for him, not comfort.

    The nice part was I got to sit down during the early pregnancy exhaustion, and I miss that now in the third trimester as I feel like I never get to just sit any longer! And I'm even more tired now.

    I also have a severe and unusual oversupply and overactive letdown problem that lasted until 10+ months, and I'm sort of hoping my toddler will want to nurse to take some of that away. A toddler understands limits, so it would be possible to limit the older child's time at the breast and use the toddler's nursing time to reduce engorgement and leaking instead of pushing the supply.

    I have been told, however, that what we experienced the first time around with severe oversupply and leakage may not be true for subsequent children as our bodies may have learned to adjust better, having been there, done that once already; I've stocked up on heavy duty wool nursing pads just in case though
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    135

    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by pipsmom
    Some of my questions include: Doesn't it complicate getting pregnant again? Make it harder and more tiring? And aren't you exhausted enough from nursing a newborn round the clock? Is it really worth adding a toddler to those painful, tired boobs? I really can't see myself nursing two at the same time, so shouldn't the first one be weaned early enough that he doesn't resent the new baby?
    Here's my experience:

    - Nightweaned my daughter at eight months old, in order to get fertility back, fell pregnant straight away.

    - Antonia continued to nurse during the day 2- 5 times during the early part of the prengancy and once or twice a day towards the end. I also returned to work full time when she was a year old, studied towards a postgraduate diploma and caught up with the chores that stay-at-home-Daddy hadn't managed to do, so yes, that was pretty tiring.

    - Because I had not stopped, breastfeeding the new baby was easy, no pain, no problems.

    - When the new milk came in, my toddler suddenly wanted to nurse all the time and I wasn't happy with that at all. I restricted her to twice a day, and we continued like that for months.

    - Bye and bye, I encouraged her to drink more cowsmilk, and during the summer she gradually weaned herself and quite enjoys her bottle of milk now. At 2 1/2, I believe she was ready for it.

    I didn't have a great time tandem feeding, but I did it for 11 months, because I didn't want Antonia to feel pushed away. Restricting her feeds was the way for me to maintain a balance between her wishes and mine.

  3. #13
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    Feb 2006
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    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    One can also vacation while pregnant -- with the same goal in mind (going away together before the next child arrived) we took a 2-week trip to England during my 2nd trimester and had a really nice time. I napped more than usual, but it was still a lovely and even romantic escape. Just a thought.

    --Rebecca

  4. #14
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    Feb 2006
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    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by quakerm0mma
    One can also vacation while pregnant -- with the same goal in mind (going away together before the next child arrived) we took a 2-week trip to England during my 2nd trimester and had a really nice time. I napped more than usual, but it was still a lovely and even romantic escape. Just a thought.

    --Rebecca
    Yes, we did that by accident last time. We wet to Bermuda over my birthday last year (because that's when our first baby would have been due) to try and cheer up a little. Found out I was pg right before we left and no rum swizzles for me - so it wasn't exactly the kind of vacation we had planned. I remember dinner at this wonderful Italian and gazing longingly at the lovely bottle of red at the next table. It also ruled out half the resturants on the island because of the fish. In any event, the kind of vacation we had in mind was a strictly adult one before we get completely overrun with kids.

  5. #15
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    Feb 2006
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    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Virtuella
    - Nightweaned my daughter at eight months old, in order to get fertility back, fell pregnant straight away.
    What do you mean by nightweaning? My son doesn't really nurse during the night these days - is that the same thing? Also, does that help you become fertile again? I wasn't aware. Good thing I'm on the pill!

    And thanks everyone for sharing your experience. I do like to learn about it so I can begin to have an idea what it's all like.

  6. #16
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    Mar 2006
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    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by pipsmom
    What do you mean by nightweaning? My son doesn't really nurse during the night these days - is that the same thing? Also, does that help you become fertile again? I wasn't aware.
    Yep, nightweaning helps restart ovulation, particularly if they are nursing between 1-3AM and you stop that. We managed to drop that feed, but I still didn't regain my fertility until we stopped all nursing for >6 hours at night for a week. Night nursing keeps up various hormones that suppress ovulation.

    I *think* I read about that in the book "Breastfeeding and Natural Child Spacing" but I'm feeling pretty brain dead right now from a busy day, compounded with Pregnancy Brain Syndrome. I know, though, I read that book, along with "Adventures in Tandem Nursing" and "How Weaning Happens" when we started thinking about the next baby, so that information had to come from one or all three of those books.
    Susan
    Mama to my all-natural boys: Ian, 9-4-04, 11.5 lbs; Colton, 11-7-06, 9 lbs, in the water; Logan, 12-8-08, 9 lbs; Gavin, 1-18-11, 9 lbs; and an angel 1-15-06
    18+ months and for Gavin, born with an incomplete cleft lip and incomplete posterior cleft palate
    Sealed for time and eternity, 7-7-93
    Always babywearing, cosleeping and cloth diapering. Living with oppositional defiant disorder and ADHD. Ask me about cloth diapering and sewing your own diapers!

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    135

    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    Quote Originally Posted by pipsmom
    What do you mean by nightweaning? My son doesn't really nurse during the night these days - is that the same thing? Also, does that help you become fertile again? I wasn't aware. Good thing I'm on the pill!
    Well, if he doesn't nurse during the night, then you didn't need to nightwean him. Antonia needed a wee nudge in that direction. I remember vaguely that something like a regular eight hour gap between feedings can start ovulation again.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    561

    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    I found nursing while pg uncomfortable, so I was glad that dd1 (2 yrs) was comfortable w/ story & drink and weaned easily. No everyone's experience is the same, though.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    11

    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    so is that why I'm so extremely tired this time around because I'm still nursing, although he only does at bedtime and nap? I can't get rid of this fatigue....I'm still waiting for the great 2nd trimester with all the energy.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    4

    Default Re: Past 18 months: why?

    My DS is 19 months, and we still nurse because, like pp he wants to. I have tried to discourage it through many different techniques, but eventually reached the conclusion that if he still needs and wants to that it's okay. I know that every baby has his own time frame for weaning and I know it's not hurting him to continue so he continues. Quite honestly I would have loved for him to quit at 15 months, but he didn't. My DS is very active and strong willed so the daytime nursings quit, but he seems to need to night nursing to counterbalance the extreme independence from me in the day. I never started nursing thinking I would nurse past a year, but as a mother I think you have to respond to your baby's cues and you are the only one who knows when it's time to stop nursing. Sometimes it's early sometimes it's late, I think that the important thing is to know that you know your baby best and that no book or other party can tell you what age is right. For me it wasn't that I thought extended BF was "better" but that it was right for us. Good Luck!

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