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Thread: On the fence here

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    4,160

    Default On the fence here

    My milk is all dried up. Logan still loves to nurse, but I have noticed he would glady eat some 'cookies' or have a good tickle instead.

    One part of me is thinking I should just finish this part up of our relationship and wean him. I'm really confident that he would do this really well. I could probably wean him in 2 weeks.

    Other part of me is hanging onto this. He still loves his boobies, why wean him all the way if I really don't have to? I'm curious about tandem nursing and was thinking of giving it a try.

    What to do?
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    SoFL
    Posts
    6,237

    Default Re: On the fence here

    i think that just because it seems like it would be easy to wean doesn't mean you should or that you and L are ready. to me, it does not sound as though you are ready to give up the sessions that are left. i think amy was tandem nursing.
    Lisa
    Married to my Sugar Daddy
    Mom to Matt (5/14/97)
    James (11/8/06)
    Kelly Anne (3/14/08)
    Paul (3/11/10)

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: On the fence here

    how long till the new baby comes?
    I get everybody mixed up
    Anyways my last two were two years appart and I had weaned my older one before the baby came.
    He only asked one time to nurse after the baby was born and I just and said its just for the baby and he was ok with that.

    You do what feals right for you!
    IF you feal like weaning go for it watch him and if he seams upset or is acting out then your moving to fast with weaning

    How many times would you say he is trying to nurse in 24 hours?
    Sometimes just cutting one more feed makes you feal beter at bout the others.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    4,160

    Default Re: On the fence here

    I think that maybe I'm hanging onto it more than he is. Usually when he asks to 'nurse' it is just a sign he needs some physical contact with me. Seems like it turns into singing a song, tickling, or cuddling.

    He DOES nurse seriously for nap and bedtime, but I know he doesn't need them. He doesn't fall asleep nursing, he just relaxes and we re-connect.

    Meh I'm just torn.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: On the fence here

    try to wean a feed and watch and see how he does...
    Pick one besides nap and bed time. Since he seams to need thoose.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    SW Ohio
    Posts
    3,133

    Default Re: On the fence here

    I know what you mean mama... it's a hard choice to make. Personally, I wanted my DD to totally self-wean on her own, and she did. She just stopped asking to nurse at her normal times, until she stopped asking all together. While it was hard for me to let it go, I knew in my heart that she was ready. Since you know Logan the best, I'm sure you know in your heart whether or not he is truly ready to wean. I like Andrea's suggestion of trying out the weaning, and if Logan seems too upset by it or starts acting out, then he's probably not ready to wean. Just remember, you have given Logan an awesome gift by nursing him for 2 years, and you should be so incredibly proud of yourself. And just think, you'll get to start all over in a few months with a newborn!!! I know I'm very excited about nursing a newborn too.
    IRL all my friends call me Buff, Wife to CB since 10/11/2003

    Mom to DD - "MJ" born 9/2007 @ 8lbs 10oz, 21.5" She's 6 years old!
    My journey nursing MJ started HERE, but we got through it and she breastfed 19.5 months, self-weaned on 5/17/09


    Mom to my current nursling, DS - "ME" born 10/2009 @ 10lbs 1oz, 22.25" He's 4 years old! And yup, he's still nursing.

    Ask me about my successful VBAC! Click here for my birth story.



  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: On the fence here

    sometimes too when they are that age I think that we start thinking they are nursing all the time when they realy aren't.
    IF that makes sence.
    If you look at your schudle for a few days you'll find that they are only asking when they are board or thirsty. And on busy days when your out and about they might just ask as soon as they get home to reconnect.
    Nothing wrong with that.

    kids can nurse at just nap and bed time ( and major hurts) for a long time!
    And that works great for them! And mom!
    After sarah turned 2 and was doing beter with solids I tried not to worry if she ask to nurse, we just would and if I didn't feal like it when she asked I would try and offer a drink or a snack, sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. After she turned 3 she rarely would ask to nurse other then bed and nap time. part of growing up
    adding a new sibbling in the mix makes things diffent we never tandem nursed.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    2,738

    Default Re: On the fence here

    At 15 months I was completely dried up, Clayton wasn't falling asleep nursing anymore. He would only nurse at bedtime, but he acted as if he had to. I just got tired of it, and cut him off cold turkey. Mind you we only nursed that one time a day at that point. He asked for it maybe 2 or 3 nights, and then he never seemed to mind after that. I am not telling you what you should or shouldn't do, I am just telling you what we did. Sometimes I miss nursing him, but all in all I am glad it went the way it did. We both were weaned gently up until the very last nursing session. I just couldn't take nursing him, when I felt like there was no real point to it. He wasn't getting any milk, and he wasn't even nursing for comfort really, because at naptime he wasn't nursing to sleep. Do whatever you feel is best for yourself and for Logan.
    Mama to my Rubies
    C '07
    A '09
    And my Christmas Eve baby
    L '12
    I will carry you all my life
    And I will praise the one who's chosen me to carry you
    W Apr '11
    R Nov '11
    The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart. *Helen Kellar*

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,272

    Default Re: On the fence here

    I think it's really personal and needs to be what's best for you and Logan and the new baby.

    Each of us have different relationships with our LO and and are in different places.

    Personally - I was quite happy when DS weaned. BUT - several things that are different over here. My DS was older (about 33 mo) and I felt like we could talk about mommy milk being "all gone" and he really got it. AND - on a personal (and somewhat selfish) level, I was quite ready for DS to wean so I could have a less restricted diet after almost 2 years eating for DS food allergies. And I'm honestly also pretty happy to have a "break" of a couple months before starting a new nursing relationship with the new baby.

    On the plus side - DS and my relationship has grown and evolved and we've found new ways to have "special time". After DS weaned instead of that 1st nursing session we started doing "snuggle time" in the mornings in my & DH bed. Its a very nice way to start the day. We've also evolved new bed-time routines. And I constantly reassure DS that mommy will be here for snuggles, hugs, kisses, and special time any time he wants.

    Right now I have no plans to tandem. We've been talking with DS alot about the new baby and I think DS will be okay with not nursing.

    I hope you find a path that works for both you and L!!
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    1,081

    Default Re: On the fence here

    Well, you could try nursing him just at his naptime and bedtime sessions and see how he does without the others and then if that goes well, you could cut out either the naptime or bedtime and see how it goes from there. That might help you decide if he's really ready or not. And it will give you a little more time to figure out your feelings on it and keep one or two sessions if you really want them.

    As you probably know, I am tandem nursing but typically, they nurse separately and Emma only nurses first thing in the morning and at bedtime. I'm working on cutting her down further. While I'm REALLY done nursing her at this point, I don't regret tandem nursing. I occassionally nurse them together before she goes to bed and it is really sweet. She will rub his head when they are nursing and is just so affectionate to him. And she gets really excited when I ask if she wants to nurse at the same time as him. I feel good that they have shared that bond and I know she will remember nursing and nursing with him. I am, however, glad that I weaned her down to 2-3 nursing sessions a day before he came home from the hospital because it can be really draining to nurse a newborn and then add a toddler on top of it. (Although the quiet is nice when they're both nursing!) I'm personally glad that she wasn't expecting to nurse every time he nurses.

    It's a tough decision.
    Mommy to:

    Emmalynn Marie
    Born at 37 weeks on 12/22/06
    5lbs 1oz 19 1/2in

    Owen Charles
    Born at 29 wks 6 days on 01/17/09
    2lbs 14oz 15in
    In NICU for 2 months


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