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Thread: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

  1. #61
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    18,063

    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    wonder how I missed that one the 1st time around...

  2. #62
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
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    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    Nope. We were nursing, it was going well, we were happy! DH is happiest when we're happy. I don't think he realized we'd go to 17 months. But it wasn't about how long, it was about what was working for us.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
    and

  3. #63
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    166

    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    My DH is the biggest lactivist out there...
    We are planning a trip to SE Asia in October, DS will be 18 months then, as a part of the planning, DH says - well, we don't have to worry about food for Kai so much, since he will nurse
    First time mommy to a wonderful baby boy, Kai, 3/26/2010
    Birth Weight: 7lb 8oz
    1 month: 9lb 6oz
    3 months: 13lb 10oz
    6 months: 17lb 1oz
    9 months: 19lb 13oz
    12 months: 21lb

    We are , love to , cloth diapering that and taking him with us everywhere.

  4. #64
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    Jun 2006
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    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your

    Bump

    Way too lazy for formula

  5. #65
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    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    Bump for Satin Mama

    Way too lazy for formula

  6. #66
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
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    92

    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    Wow thanks for this thread. I am having the same issue. Hubby wants me to wean but I don't want to (and neither does LO). I've realized how arbitrary age 1 is and how much baby still wants to nurse. Hubby's main problem is that he ends up waking alone each morning b/c I end up in baby's bed. He has always gotten a full nights sleep since we brought her home after delivery (so no complaints on sleep).

    Hubby says it's not healthy for baby to be nursing at this age (15 months), she will become too co-dependent and it would affect her emotional development (?) The pediatrician also said to not nurse during the day (night nursing was ok). I wasn't there so what could be his reasoning?

    I have a feeling baby will eventually self-wean. I'm a 1st time mom but based on what i've observed from her so far and her personality, I have strong sense she will eventually self wean. Am I being practical? Should I have a more concrete plan on how to end the nursing phase?

    thanks all.

  7. #67
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    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    She will self wean eventually. However no one should expect it before 24months. And last I heard the AAP was supposed to be changing their recommendation to AT LEAST two years. That's the thing about the one year recommendation. People read it and interpret it wrong. It's AT LEAST a year. Not until a year. A year is the MINIMUM amount of time a child you be breastfed. It means that at the year point weaning BEGINS. Not that that is where it ends. And your child has begun to wean. Because the minute your child is not exclusively breastfeeding, weaning has begun. And this year since you are not the only food source you can begin to set limits and begin the part of breastfeeding that is a relationship with your child vs the part where you are the end all be all for her because she gets all her food from you. So I think he needs to rethink his position. Breastmilk is about so much more than nutrition and all the things he is worried about are actually benefits. Like having the antibodies (Which increase dramatically after the year point because children are drinking less milk and that is when they naturally out and moving around interacting with other littles) but the attachment that your child has to you and your breast is one of love and trust. And you really get to see that after the year point. When your baby nurses her own dolls or stuffies and when they ask YOU to nurse their toys. It's also I really nice tool to still have when a child gets hurt on the play ground. It also is a fail safe to fall back on in terms of filling the gaps while your baby gets the hang of solids. It DID affect my childs' emotional development. It made him a very very confident individual. It also really taught him to self regulate in terms of solid food. When he would talk about his weaning party to people he was as proud of that as he was of learning to use the potty. It was a graduation of sorts. It was definitely nice that we waited until he had language so that he could feel like he was involved in that decision. At this point if you'd truly like to be done by two, I work on setting limits. The 1st one is don't offer don't refuse. From there we moved to not doing it out in public at all unless he was hurt. And then from there were went to specific times a day. Like at wake up, up and down for naps, to reconnect when I got home from work and to bed....I didn't night wean until much later. And involved my DH to really take over nighttime parenting. So if your DH isn't ready to do that....he should back off IMO....

    Way too lazy for formula

  8. #68
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    5,593

    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*bluesea View Post
    Wow thanks for this thread. I am having the same issue. Hubby wants me to wean but I don't want to (and neither does LO). I've realized how arbitrary age 1 is and how much baby still wants to nurse. Hubby's main problem is that he ends up waking alone each morning b/c I end up in baby's bed. He has always gotten a full nights sleep since we brought her home after delivery (so no complaints on sleep).

    Hubby says it's not healthy for baby to be nursing at this age (15 months), she will become too co-dependent and it would affect her emotional development (?) The pediatrician also said to not nurse during the day (night nursing was ok). I wasn't there so what could be his reasoning?

    I have a feeling baby will eventually self-wean. I'm a 1st time mom but based on what i've observed from her so far and her personality, I have strong sense she will eventually self wean. Am I being practical? Should I have a more concrete plan on how to end the nursing phase?

    thanks all.
    why not bring baby into your bed so you can all three sleep together. Many fathers find great joy in bedsharing.

    Many dads of breastfed children find they get more sleep, so your husbands experience there is typical.

    of course your child will self wean. How many adults or teens or even school age kids do you know who still nurse?
    Last edited by @llli*lllmeg; October 22nd, 2013 at 03:21 PM.

  9. #69
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    this is a good, short article that addresses some of your husbands concerns. Jack Newman is a Canadian pediatrician. http://www.breastfeedinginc.ca/conte...agename=doc-BT

  10. #70
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
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    92

    Default Re: Did any of you have to convince your dh...

    djsmom -- thank you soo much! your testament and info is incredibly helpful and comforting. i have realized the same thing -- our BF relationship is so amazing after the year point. it's not about food but about connecting w mama. she also nurses for downtime and of course for naps/sleep. I didn't know but I've already been doing all of your tips in 'setting limits' we dont nurse in public, i only offer when she asks, and we pretty much nurse at wake-up, naps, after coming from work, and bedtime (exactly as you said). Yay, what a relief, I feel like I'm on the right path. She will eventually self-wean. I know I'll be sad the day she says no more, but I can see how letting her decide will help her confidence and develop her sense of independence. thank you also for clarifying what the AAP recommends -- EVERYONE I know misinterprets that.

    lllmeg -- thank you soo much for the article and encouragement. the article explains AAP stance on BF and UNICEF's recommendation. I really enjoyed reading about the emotional benefits. I will show this to hubby. thank you.

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