Emma is 29months old. She LOVES to nurse and always has. She hasn't done much in the way of weaning on her own. Since she was around 17months I have slowly cut back her daytime nursing sessions, as I saw she was ready. When she was 18months I night-weaned her, which went well and she was fully night-weaned at 21months. This was all my doing, although she did o.k. with it. When I was hospitalized in the beginning of January she was nursing 3 times a day - morning, nap, and bedtime. This seemed to be o.k. with her and it was great for me. She continued nursing during my hospital stay, 10 days total. She napped with me there so she nursed then and 1 or 2 other times in the afternoon/evening before going home. After her brother was born (10weeks early) I let her nurse a little more often, maybe 3-5 times a day depending on the day as it helped my milk come in and I preferred doing that to pumping as much. As it got closer to him coming home from the NICU, I cut her back to the 3 times a day. A little while after he was home I cut her down to 2 times a day - morning and night, which is where we're at now. I didn't nurse her in the evenings and mornings when I realized Owen and I had thrush in the middle of April, and she was pretty much o.k. with that.
Sometimes I really don't want to nurse her, other times I don't mind it, and other times I like that we still do that. I feel like I can handle nursing her 2 times a day, but lately she has been hounding me to nurse her more often. And when I say she can nurse at bedtime, or in the early morning hours when she asks I tell her when the sun comes up, she gets really upset. She'll hit me and whine a ton! She'll say "sing Twinkle Twinkle one time" as that's what I did to help wean her down from other nursing sessions. Occassionally she gets upset when I'm nursing Owen and she asks, and I tell her at bedtime or in the morning. I don't mind tandem nursing, but I don't want to nurse them both at the same time all the time (although the few times I've nursed them together, she's LOVED it). I'm not sure what to do - I don't like that she's getting aggressive and hitting me when I tell her she has to wait. Part of me feels like it's o.k. for her to have to wait - that's an important thing for her to understand about lots of things in life. And part of me feels bad that I don't want to nurse her as often as she seems to want it. The more she hounds me, the less I want to nurse her at all. I have this really strong feeling that I need to make sure Owen gets the milk he needs, that it's beneficial to Emma but that's secondary. I read books or play with her when Owen's nursing and I get time with just her every day and we do something special together every week. I'm just frustrated. I really want her to self-wean from these two last sessions and it's important to me that our nursing relationship end on a good note, but I feel like our nursing relationship is one of frustration with each other. Oh and fyi, Emma is VERY strong-willed, she has a very strong personality and is really controlling. I love her dearly and want to meet her needs but I feel like she's so needy with nursing right now and it's too much for me to constantly be hounded.
Any ideas on how to handle this?