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Thread: Started daycare - wants to nurse all the time we're together now!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006

    Exclamation Started daycare - wants to nurse all the time we're together now!

    Hello! I have a wonderful 14 mo old DS who started daycare three weeks ago. Prior to that, his auntie or grandparents watched him while I was at work. He's been using a sippy cup during the day since six months. Since starting daycare, however, he only drinks about six ounces of milk a day at daycare. When he gets home, he wants to be held and nurse literally all evening. I know he's not getting milk the whole time - and I do have things I have to do in the evening. Occasionally he'll let me read him a book or play with toys, but mostly he wants to nurse - or he cries. We co-sleep and he still nurses a few times a night then, too. Anyone have a similar experience? Any suggestions? I'm not ready to wean, but I can't spend five hours a night holding and nursing him. On the other hand, we practice attachment parenting, so I don't want to let him "cry it out". HELP!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Started daycare - wants to nurse all the time we're together now!

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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Started daycare - wants to nurse all the time we're together now!

    ok thats silly and it will not let me edit it anyways.... sounds normal.
    sometimes it takes them a long time to get used to day care.
    you could try and limit his nursing if you can deal with the tears.
    Sometimes its easier to give in then listen to them cry.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2006

    Default Re: Started daycare - wants to nurse all the time we're together now!

    Wow, this sounds almost exactly like my current situation. My DD, almost 12 months, stays home with DH and DS during the day while I work. She only takes a few ounces of BM during the day (in a bottle and a sippy). She wants to nurse or be held by me a LOT when I come home at the end of the day. She had been only BFing 1-2 times per night, but some nights lately she seems to want to nurse more often, and for long stretches.
    The upside of this is that the evening and night nursings help keep my supply up, and of course DD and I get quite a bit of bonding and cuddling time. I don’t think she BFs quite as often as your DS, though. She does spend some time playing and eating dinner in the evenings.
    Is your DS eating many solids? Although I still spoon-feed some foods to DD, like yogurt and some pureed baby foods, for the most part we have been giving her all kinds of finger foods to try. It’s messy, but it’s fun for her and I get some time to eat dinner myself and maybe accomplish one or two other tasks (if I eat quickly!). If you have a partner or someone to help out in the evenings, maybe they could take DS for walk or engage him in an activity for a while so you can get other things done.
    We don’t co-sleep, but we also do not practice CIO. I think my “method” is known as night-responsiveness. I have a monitor and I simply go to her when I hear her wake up in the night. Usually I can just nurse her back to sleep and lay her back in her crib without a problem (although sometimes it’s more of a struggle!). You might consider starting to alter your family bed situation if that is within your comfort zone. Dr. Jay Gordon (a big proponent of the family bed) has some ideas for this here:
    However, he does say that it’s not a good idea to try this when your child is going through a big change in his life (like starting daycare, I would think). It might be that your DS is still adjusting to not having mommy around more often, so he’s really clinging to you when you’re home. Maybe this will get better as he adjusts more to daycare and his new situation.
    I definitely do not have this all figured out either, and I’m hoping to get some good tips from other responses to your post!


    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

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