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Thread: Help keep me going

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    135

    Default Help keep me going

    I am so exhausted and I just need some encouragement. I have been back to work for two weeks now and I just want to crawl under my desk and sleep and cry.

    The interrupted sleep was somewhat manageable while I was at home but now that I am getting up every morning, getting baby ready, coming to work, nursing during lunch and pumping the rest of the time and trying to keep up with house and meals, I just don't know how I am gonna keep going.

    Then to top it off the last three days I must have caught some sort of virus or flue because my entire body is aching and I feel just miserable.

    I worry if baby is gaining enough weight. He is much smaller then most babies at 13 weeks. He is happy though, he smiles a lot and has lots of wet diapers so I am going to try to trust that nursing is going ok. And he is wonderful to be with. That's my rainbow in the midst of all this difficulty.

    But is all this fatigue going to dry up my milk supply? I know the things I am experiencing are no different then what all other mothers experience but its just that how do you guys keep going? How do you cope with the exhaustion especially when you catch the cold or the flu?

    I've read articles about how sleep deprivation makes you more susceptible to colds but those articles, short of listing the hundreds of ways that sleep deprivation can destroy your health, offer little to no useful advice. They all just say we need more sleep. But how can I do that when I am working full time and nursing? I can't.

    I don't meant to complain so much but gosh, going back to work is really taking its toll.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    257

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    I'm sorry you're having a hard time Do you have a husband/fiance/friend that shares with any chores at home? What are your work hours?

    I wish there was a miracle pill we could take that would help us make it through the day Tell me what it's like at home and work and I'll try to make suggestions for you...

    I'm Jill
    Mother to
    Bear 12/13/98
    Bagalli 8/5/07
    little (3/21/09).
    Kafessa: 5/17/10
    expecting 10/1/11


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    2,538

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    when i returned to work it helped to establish a routine.... i would pack everything, my pump supplies, the baby's bag for DC, pick out both of our clothes for the following day, etc... all the night before, it really helped if i did it all in a sequence i could get it all done in a matter of minutes since i wasn't rusinh around trying to get to work.... i also started showering at night gasp I know it's a foreign concept to women who care alot about looks but seriously It meant everything to me to sleep an extra hour in the morning... I would come home, nurse, have dinner, pack our bags, take my shower put baby to bed (read continually nurse) makes sure our clothes were all picked out.... go to bed, wake up aprox 1 hour before I had to leave, nurse each side aprox 20 minutes each while laying next to DS, put my clothes on, have DH dress DS, and brush my teeth and hair (ponytail) and go!
    Autumn
    Moma to *Silas* 10-30-07

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    2,538

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    oh and we put DS in a crib but the deal was anytime he woke DH went o get him and bring him to our bed to cosleep / nurse.... we'd both fall asleep quicker that way
    Autumn
    Moma to *Silas* 10-30-07

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    miles from nowhere
    Posts
    11,108

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    It's definitely difficult, especially in those early days before you settle into a routine that works for you. I'll tell you what saved me- cosleeping. It was the only way I could nurse my daughter as much as she needed at night (which suddenly quadrupled when I went back to work) and still get enough sleep to make it through the next day. Is that a possibility for you?
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    257

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    with pp. You'll more than likely want to change your schedule. Getting everything ready the night before helps a lot.
    I had dh prepare pump bag for the following day. He had to wash all parts when I got home and have it ready for me to take to work the next day. It was nice to have him do that because it made the chore of pumping easier. We distributed chores more evenly. I would cook dinner and he'd clean it up. He did laundry including folding and putting it away. He could choose to give lo a bath or load her diaper bag for the next day. It was really helpful.
    We also have a 10 yr old ds that I put dh in charge of. He had to take him to soccer, guitar, baseball, scouts...all of it It helped me out a lot.
    However, when it came to getting up with lo at night it was all on me. That was the hardest part, no matter how many times she got up I had to get up with her (we didn't co sleep) and still get up at 5:30 or 5:15 (if I had to wash my hair) and put in a good days work.
    All of the stuff you can get someone to help you with take. You need the help and it makes life easier on everyone. HTH
    I'm Jill
    Mother to
    Bear 12/13/98
    Bagalli 8/5/07
    little (3/21/09).
    Kafessa: 5/17/10
    expecting 10/1/11


  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    sleepless in ohio
    Posts
    2,389

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    The first several weeks (months, even) back to work can be sooo difficult- emotionally and physically.

    ITA about co-sleeping. Katy woke up every 1.5-2 hours throughout the night until she was almost 14 months, which made working full-time, nursing, pumping, etc very difficult. It was dangerous for me to even be driving to and from work/the sitter's somedays (I say this in total seriousness. There were many times I almost fell asleep while driving). Being able to have her close by at night helped, though. Even if she would fully wake up to nurse, I could fall back asleep while she finished up. Co-sleeping really helped.

    As far as cleaning and cooking is concerned, do you have anyone else at home that help out? Even a relative, friend or neighbor that could drop by once a week? If you don't, forget about the unnecessary cleaning. Really. This is much easier said than done, I know, but I've really had to let a lot of things go since having my 2nd baby...and now being pregnant with my 3rd. My house never looks like I want it to, but we just say it "looks lived in."

    Rest assured it will get easier. I promise.
    Sarah- Mommy to Ally (4/16/06) , Katlyn (11/13/07) & Rebekah (10/21/09)
    All three, all natural!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Durham, NC
    Posts
    723

    Default Re: Help keep me going



    It's hard, draining, and all around rough going back to work. The good news is that with time and an established routine it does get better (really it does).

    I agree with pp - can you get some extra help at home and see if anyone else can help with some of those other household responsibilities? I know my DH was a lifesaver... but I had to let go and realize there was no such thing as supermom and had to come to a new agreement on "acceptable cleanliness". My floors didn't get swept every day, maybe once a week if I was lucky. Dinner was simple items - pasta, grilled cheese, quick. He became me. dish duty and laundry man.

    I also resorted to co-sleeping. It kept me sane. Here is some info. on how to do it safely http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/T102200.asp

    Also as I was reading your post I thought of this too -- are you sure you have the flu? Mastitis also can feel like the flu too. http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/mom/mastitis.html
    Your body may still be adjusting to not being together with your baby - how often are you pumping?

    Hope you feel better soon.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    135

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    I pump only twice a day. I nurse him in the morning and at lunch and when I get home and in the middle of the night. Daycare gives him a bottle twice a day. So I normally pump once in the morning at work and once in the afternoon to try to match when daycare feeds him.

    My LO sleeps next to me in a bassinet so I don't have to get out of bed unless its a diaperchange but I have not learned yet how to nurse laying down so I end up having to stay sitting up the whole time.

    My husband tries to help but his work has him working 12 hour days in construction doing concrete. His work is an hour away and by the time he gets home he is completely useless and in a lot of pain from his day at work.

    Maybe it is a plugged duct or something that is causing the achiness because that's all I have is just a feeling of terrible ache all over and exhaustion and a fever. I didn't think about that being something I might have.

    My LO doesn't have trouble nursing from me but this past two days I have not been able to pump as much as I normally do.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    2,538

    Default Re: Help keep me going

    s it's the stress and being tired affecting your supply mama!!! I don't know about the aching....

    can you stay in bed with lo this weekend and Nurse, a nursing vacation is what we like to call it.... and try try try to learn how to nurse lying down, your whole world will change i swear it! i'll try and find a link with pics that helped me....
    http://www.mother-2-mother.com/tut-layingdown.htm
    http://www.breastfeeding.com/helpme/...sitioning.html
    http://pregnancy.about.com/od/feedin...---Nursing.htm
    https://www.mothering.com/discussion...php?p=12366083 more tips
    Last edited by @llli*lidarln; April 23rd, 2009 at 03:33 PM.
    Autumn
    Moma to *Silas* 10-30-07

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