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Thread: being pressured to use a bottle

  1. #1
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    Mar 2009
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    Question being pressured to use a bottle

    hi! my daughter just turned 3 months old and she has only been breastfed. i am just now returning to work part time and am able to take her with me. all of my family and co workers are on my case because my daughter will not take a bottle or pacifier. i have pumped and frozen tons of milk to use when needed. i was planning to return to work full time but decided not to. i have tried feeding breastmilk from a bottle but she refuses. everyone says its insane and that they have never heard of a baby that will not take a bottle. they (family & co workers) say to just let her cry and when she gets hungry enough she will take the bottle, but i cant let her cry she wants and needs me! she is nursing on demand usually every 2-3 hours sometimes more. whenever she is fussy or acts hungry i always try to nurse her. i LOVE breastfeeding, the bonding and health benefits, and want only the best for her. i do have to do a bit of planning when trying to run errands around her feedings. so am i just crazy for not making her take breastmilk from the bottle or is it common for some babies to refuse bottles. the pacifier is not an issue my other daughter wouldnt take one either thank goodness! we have tried all kinds of bottles and nipples but it just doesnt work for her. should i do anything diffrent trying the bottles or just tell everyone to back off. it breaks my heart to hear her cry and if i can calm her by nursing i dont see the problem! is there some reason everyone is pushing the use of a bottle that i am un aware of?! thanks so much!

  2. #2
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    Jun 2006
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    Default Re: being pressured to use a bottle

    It is hard to not receive much (or any) support from those that should be there for us. But the best thing you can do for your daughter is just what you're doing... figuring out her needs and prividing them for her. If she is happy and youre happy and there are no problems for you with this arrangement (other than the negative feedback) then keep it up - know your doing the best by her and see if anything on this resource provides some helpful info.

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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
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    96

    Default Re: being pressured to use a bottle

    That stinks your feeling all that pressure. I can't believe they suggested letting her cry till she takes a bottle. I'm sure you know trying to starve the child isn't going to work. Good for you to stand your ground. She'll take a pacifier or bottle when shes ready. My son at 4 mo all the sudden wanted a pacifier after showing no interest in one. Are these people not familiar with breastfeeding? Your doing the right thing
    for over a year now!!!

    Xavier 11/5/08


  4. #4
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    Default Re: being pressured to use a bottle

    I'm sorry you're not getting the support you need from the people who should be there for you!

    everyone says its insane and that they have never heard of a baby that will not take a bottle.
    Maybe they haven't been listening. Bottle refusal does happen. And I think pacifier refusal happens even more frequently- my kid liked the paci at first but by the time she was around 3 months old she had no interest in it. She was smart enough to figure out that there was no reason to suck on silicone when she could suck on mom instead.

    so am i just crazy for not making her take breastmilk from the bottle
    If you don't need your baby to take a bottle, there's no reason why you should try to make her do so. Lots of women get through breastfeeding without giving bottles.

    is there some reason everyone is pushing the use of a bottle that i am un aware of?!
    I think a lot of people push bottles because they assume that breastfeeding is a difficult chore, while bottles make life easier. They don't realize that bottlefeeding is much more work than breastfeeding, what with all the pumping and storing and transporting of milk and the constant washing of bottles and pump parts. There's also a lot of unspoken prejudice against breastfeeding- people often want a mom to use bottles so that they don't have to see nursing going on. (Because it's really all about them, right? )

    Again, the only reason to try to get your baby to take a bottle is if you need or want someone else to feed her. If you're happy with how things are going, there's no need to push the bottle.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
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  5. #5
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    Mar 2009
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    columbia sc
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    Default Re: being pressured to use a bottle

    thank y'all so much for your help, encouragement, and support! i just needed and outside opinion to know that i am doing the best for her! i have taken her to work with me and everyone stops and asks if i am breastfeeding or just holding her while i am working and they are shocked when i say im feeding her. it really isnt that hard to get your work done and feed and bond with your baby. i just wish breastfeeding in public was more recognized and accepted! i have worked in pediatrics for 8 years now. you would think that would be the one place no one would give a second thought about it! guess i was wrong cause even there bottlefeeding i the norm.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    Default Re: being pressured to use a bottle

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    I'm sorry you're not getting the support you need from the people who should be there for you!



    Maybe they haven't been listening. Bottle refusal does happen. And I think pacifier refusal happens even more frequently- my kid liked the paci at first but by the time she was around 3 months old she had no interest in it. She was smart enough to figure out that there was no reason to suck on silicone when she could suck on mom instead.



    If you don't need your baby to take a bottle, there's no reason why you should try to make her do so. Lots of women get through breastfeeding without giving bottles.



    I think a lot of people push bottles because they assume that breastfeeding is a difficult chore, while bottles make life easier. They don't realize that bottlefeeding is much more work than breastfeeding, what with all the pumping and storing and transporting of milk and the constant washing of bottles and pump parts. There's also a lot of unspoken prejudice against breastfeeding- people often want a mom to use bottles so that they don't have to see nursing going on. (Because it's really all about them, right? )

    Again, the only reason to try to get your baby to take a bottle is if you need or want someone else to feed her. If you're happy with how things are going, there's no need to push the bottle.
    she said everything I was going to. FWIW, ds2 never liked a bottle. I went back to work for about a month. He would never eat well from a bottle.
    If you decide to try to bottle feed your lo, you may need to have someone else give the bottle. Lots of babies won't take a bottle when the real thing (mom) is right there.
    Proud mom of 2 boys, both weaned gradually and with love.


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