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Thread: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

  1. #1
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    Default Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    I think it's because she wants to nurse all the time now and I know that Kate was done at this age and I know that's not fair to Norah, but when I'm nursing her I feel like it's not fair to Kate and OMG, I am so conflicted!

    If I have to have "MURSH!" screamed in my face one more time, so help me!!

    I wanted her to wean on her own, but trust me on this, if I have to wait for that she will be 5 and I just don't want to.

    I think I'm going to start doing more distract and redirect type stuff and try to get down to just nap and bed time. That would be great.

    She is going through a super-clingy phase right now and the more she smothers me, the more I want to run....and the more she wants so smother me.

    I know the length of time to nurse is as long as it's mutually desirable between mother and child and there are times that I'm happy to do it b/c it is the only real cuddle time I have with this non-stop child...but I'm just ready to be done nursing. My poor little flaccid boobs have had it!
    Mother - Wife - Artist - Cook - Writer - EnvironMENTAList - Cloth Diaperer (but we are soooo done with diapers) - Organic Health Nut...I'm sure there's more.

    DD1 - 12/15/05 Breastfed for 16.5 months
    DD2 - 8/6/07 Breastfed for 3 whole years and 3 little, extra days.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean



    Its okay to compromise. Its okay to say "Not right now." Its okay to make it work for BOTH of you. There are lots of times in parenting that we face these sort of battles, kwim?

    Lyn
    Lyn
    Nursing the girl with kaleidoscope eyes


    Mama to Daniel (12/3/06) and Lucy Jane (8/28/08)

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    Start working on negotiating. Things like An Ice Cube Tray juice pop or a piece of cheese. Setting limits is the place to begin the GRADUAL process you are looking for!

    Way too lazy for formula

  4. #4
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    May 2007
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    I went through something similar, once I cut him back I enjoyed nursing again. It's hard though especially when they are so attached to nursing whenever they want.

    Mostly I just never got into our 'nursing position' on the couch anymore and we kept busy out of house.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    I'm right there with ya. My DD is about a week older than Norah. We had been down to bedtime, once during the night, and naptime on weekends, but lately it's been much more frequent. And I do find myself conflicted. Just like you the more she asks, the more I don't want to nurse. But, conversely, I think if she just up and quit on her own I'd want it back. I have been redirecting her a lot during the daytime (at night redirecting just causes tantrums). If she asks for milk I offer a cup of soy milk and more often than not she accepts the offer. And now that the weather is starting to get a bit warmer here in the frozen NE I can distract her by going outside to play. She is rather smart though and sometimes she'll say she's sleepy and wants a nap cause she knows she can nurse for a nap but she isn't really sleepy she's just pretending in order to get some boob. So, sometimes I have to hand her over to DH and leave the room for a while and he's able to get her to focus on playing in a way that I can't when the boobs are right there in her face.
    I'm Wendi.
    Mom to:
    DD1 7/28/07 for 21 mos and weaned with
    &
    DD2 12/16/09

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*danlynclark View Post


    Its okay to compromise. Its okay to say "Not right now." Its okay to make it work for BOTH of you. There are lots of times in parenting that we face these sort of battles, kwim?

    Lyn
    You are doing such a great job. Don't feel bad at all. You have made it so much further than many of us. I know I was done at 15 months, and pushed Clayton a little at the end. We were only nursing at night, and I wasn't making any milk. You have to do what works for you!
    Mama to my Rubies
    C '07
    A '09
    And my Christmas Eve baby
    L '12
    I will carry you all my life
    And I will praise the one who's chosen me to carry you
    W Apr '11
    R Nov '11
    The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart. *Helen Kellar*

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    I chuckled on the "MURSH" being screamed into your face, because I have so BTDT, accept it was "NURSH" for us. It was enough to make me For me, what worked when I was completely overwhlemed and definately didn't like his approach to asking was to let him know he needs to ask nicely. Then I would offer him a cup of something else (at this point water was always what he was given and didn't cut it in these instances and my boy loves milk so I would offer milk) Slowely, he realized that if he was screaming "Nursh" at me, he wasn't going to get anywhere. Things backed off a little after that to a comfortable place. And just the other day he told me he was "All Done with Nursing", which lasted about 24 hours, but nonetheless, it's on his terms with a little guidance from me along the way!
    Kelly

    Mommy to Gabriel born 12/25/06 Breastfed 12/25/06 - 12/09 and possibly here and there still
    Madelyn born 9/24/09 delivered at home and caught by my husband

    "To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right."

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    Lisa
    Married to my Sugar Daddy
    Mom to Matt (5/14/97)
    James (11/8/06)
    Kelly Anne (3/14/08)
    Paul (3/11/10)

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    Yes Christy do remember that it is a dance. And now that Norah is old enough to eat solids and has some language, her needs don't have to always be more important than yours. She can learn "Not right now" or "Mommy needs to eat 1st" Or "You can Nurse OR you can have THIS instead" Or "Not until naptime" or "Not until bed time". I would not try to go from "on demand" to only twice a day. That seems like a HUGE transition for someone that small to feel safe and comfortable with. I wou;d try to set other limits 1st. Like right now do you have any limits set about whether or not you nurse while out and about? That was our 1st "limit". "We only do this at home." Or "Not until we get home".
    And then at home I would try to negotiate my way out of the sessions I didn't want. So he still felt like he got some choices. DJ also would try to lay down an hour before he really wanted to go to sleep to get to nurse. That let me know he really still needed some connection time he wasn't getting from me when we started to cut back. Start setting SOME limits and negotiating some and I am sure you will find a tolerable balance!

    Way too lazy for formula

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Increasingly feeling the need to wean

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nolamomma View Post
    She is going through a super-clingy phase right now and the more she smothers me, the more I want to run....and the more she wants so smother me.
    I hear you. I feel the same way- when DD is acting clingy, constantly crawling into my lap and whining for "pupple" I just want to scream and run off to my fortress of solitude.

    What's the weather like down in NOLA- is it nice enough to be outside a LOT? My DD really seems to lose interest in nursing when we're out and about.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

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