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Thread: Problem with 16 month old

  1. #1

    Default Problem with 16 month old

    I am new to the forums here, but I have no idea where else to turn. I have tried contacting one of the leaders in a nearby area and have not had a response yet. My leader that I would normally go to for issues had something terrible happen, and I cannot talk to her at the moment. She is going through enough as it is.

    Let me start by saying this. I am pregnant. I am 16 weeks to be exact. I had to night wean a few weeks ago because of pure exhaustion. My daughter still liked to nurse every few hours at night. She has always nursed a lot. We have had a lot of issues and problems on our journey here breastfeeding. She has always had problems with her latch. I will fix it and then it will start back up again. The problem now is that she is a lot more stubborn and I am having some real issues.

    I know nipples can be sore from pregnancy, but I am not so sure that is the problem. I think this because sometimes I will get her latched on and it is fine for about 5 minutes and then it starts to hurt. It almost feels like she is resting her teeth on my nipple. I have tried to make her open big and then I pull her in fast. She gets very angry and wants to slide down. She does not want to nurse with my nipple in. If I can get her to do this it usually feels pretty good.

    I just don't know what to do. I kept having to take her off the breast and then she got so upset I could not calm her down. She cries and cries (screaching) and it is really starting to make me cry to. My husband is deployed and I live in Germany. I have a few friends, but I feel so alone a lot of the time. None of my friends has had to deal with a baby like this or they don't breastfeed at all.

    I don't want breastfeeding to turn into something terrible. I want it to be enjoyable. I don't feel like she is ready to wean, and I don't feel like I am ready for her to. She just started eating solids a few months ago on a normal basis, and she has LOTS of food allergies. She actually just started eating normal meals a few weeks ago. I just don't know how I would get her to eat healthy if I don't breastfeed. I think it is so important.

    Any help would be much appreciated. I am at a loss and I just don't know what to do anymore.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2006

    Default Re: Problem with 16 month old

    Scraping and lazy latch are especially uncomfortable (or downright painful!) during pregnancy!
    Have you tried nursing her in a different position? The open-big-and-pull-closer approach usually worked for me and my "lazy latch" toddler, but it sounds like you've tried that. I would actually tell my DD1 that if she could not nurse if she was going to bite/scrape, but she was almost 2, very verbal, and eating lots of solids by then so it was a different situation. She could understand what I was saying and adjust accordingly if she tried, which may not be the case with a 16 month old. Maybe these suggestions would help:

    Could it also be that your milk supply is going down (this happens in about 70% of pregnancies) and your daughter is trying to get more milk out and becoming frustrated?
    Here is some more information on nursing during pregnancy and tandem nursing that you might find helpful:

    We are here for you!


    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Problem with 16 month old

    I'm sorry your having a hard time..
    Its ok to limit nursing with a child of that age to something your more comfortable with!
    I had some off thoose same fealings when I weaned my phillip.
    I was pg and couldn't stand it anymore.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2008

    Default Re: Problem with 16 month old

    No useful info, just and !

    (I'm sure some more mamas here have gone through similar things & will have lots of helpful info.)
    Imma to AA, born at home 11/12/07 , juggling , working, APing , cloth diapering , - and . I'm done - yay!


  5. #5

    Default Re: Problem with 16 month old

    Thank you all for the kind words. Mollyb, the information was VERY useful. I followed what the kellymom page said, and I have had three successful feeds. I have not had the bad pain since. Well, if I do get it, then I move her, me, her head, etc like it says. Thank you so much! I am feeling so much better. None of the sessions have been screaming and crying stressful times. Mollyb, you were a lifesaver.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2008

    Default Re: Problem with 16 month old

    I'm so glad to hear you got the help you needed here! I'm just checking in after not doing so for a day and a half, but post again if you need us. You're really working hard to take care of your 16mo during your pregnancy!

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