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Thread: Cutting out the quickies

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    4,160

    Default Cutting out the quickies

    We're SO CLOSE!!!!

    But he's still during the day lifting up my shirt and sucking for a few seconds here and there. Not for milk but just to 'check in' with me. It's mostly in the mornings and evenings.

    I've tried everything. When I try and distract or refuse, usually he gets SO pissed and gets quite insistent on getting his mouth on my breasts.

    Do I continue to let him do this, and let it run its natural course? I am not seeing AF and I know this suckling isn't helping.

    BTW we're down to bedtime nursing, and sometimes nap but not every day.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Toronto, Canada
    Posts
    2,339

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    The "quickies" are what helped my sister wean. The only limit she set was that her DD had to be fast. It turned into a little game for a few weeks and she eventually stopped asking altogether. I don't know if you could do the same and use the "quickies" to your advantage?
    Jess

    Mama to my little Roxie Roo, 06/11/08


    April miles for TBTTW: 63

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2007
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    4,160

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*jessruff View Post
    The "quickies" are what helped my sister wean. The only limit she set was that her DD had to be fast. It turned into a little game for a few weeks and she eventually stopped asking altogether. I don't know if you could do the same and use the "quickies" to your advantage?
    I don't think that would work. It's already like a game, lift up mommy's shirt because he can.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,272

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    Somewhere at about that age I started gently putting limits on nursing - 1st thing in the morning, nap time (on weekends), after preschool (or after nap on the weekends), and bedtime. And also helping DS learn that sometimes he needs to wait and can't always have "mommy milk" NOW.

    We're nowhere near weaning - and for me putting some limits on nursing has made me happier to continue to nurse.

    Perhaps just my opinion - but to me setting limits on nursing is similar to any other toddler limit setting. And yes, that did include some temper tantrums from DS. But to me not all that different than telling DS that he can't have cookies for breakfast, that he can have cookies later. I started telling DS "no mommy milk now - you can have mommy milk at bed time".
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,272

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*green.momma View Post
    lift up mommy's shirt because he can.
    What happens if you tell him that only mommy gets to lift up mommy's shirt?
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    4,160

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*lsksam View Post
    What happens if you tell him that only mommy gets to lift up mommy's shirt?
    Then he either perceives it as a game or he flips out. And idk if I want to push this? If he wants it that bad, then I'm wondering if he NEEDS these little check in's w/ me still?

    We are greatly enjoying toddler nursing, don't get me wrong. And I would be perfectly happy to keep the bedtime nursing for as long as he wants... but yeah idk. I'm like... do I push this or let it be?

    Confused.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,272

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    I'm guessing that yes he needs to check in with mommy.

    He probably doesn't "need" to do that by nursing. Could you create some sort of other special ritual / snuggling / mommy time?

    But yeah - it does depend on how much you want to push it.

    I found this LLLI policy statement on weaning to be quite helpful.

    Bold mine.

    Weaning

    Natural weaning is the gradual end of the breastfeeding relationship between a responsive mother and her growing child.

    As the child matures, his changing physical and emotional needs are increasingly satisfied through means other than breastfeeding.

    Although the child usually initiates natural weaning, the mother continues to take an active role by determining in each situation whether nursing or some other approach will best meet her child’s needs.

    A mother demonstrates her commitment to natural weaning through her sensitivity to her child’s individual needs and readiness; her flexibility in responding to the unpredictable course of natural weaning and her understanding of and trust in the fundamental stages of a child’s development.
    Last edited by @llli*lsksam; January 23rd, 2009 at 02:49 PM. Reason: formatting
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    199

    Default Re: Cutting out the quickies

    My DS does this all the time...although he is only a little over a year (13 months next week). I would like him to nurse longer, but he just checks in - I find it annoying to haul out my boobs at frequent intervals and have him wander away 2 seconds later. I just let him flip out for a bit and ignore it. He eventually finds something else to do! Even now when I OFFER he just blows me off and finds something more interesting. It will probably pass...I would let him flip out and ignore it once to see what happens (I know, it's hard to ignore!).
    Mama to William James born January 2nd, 2008
    Nursed 2 years, 2 months! and I think we're done!
    And our new Lucy Jane born March 30th, 2010, 7 lb. 4 oz., 20.5 inches

    Pro-breastfeeding quotes:
    http://www.quotegarden.com/breastfeeding.html

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