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Thread: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2008

    Default Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    Did you hear the one about the toddler losing interest in breastfeeding? Oh, how I did laugh when I read "Mothering your Nursing Toddler."

    Let me say that I love and adore my DD. She is wonderful. She is bright, happy, loving, and absolutely everything you could ever want from a daughter and she is my world.

    However, the child (who will be THREE in February) LOVES.THE.BOOB.

    Most of the time, in fact almost all the time until today, I was fine with that. Sure, I would occasionally get a little sick of nursing, but it wasn't a huge deal.

    Today I want to scream "LEAVE MY BREASTS ALONE." DD sleeps with us and therefore thinks the breastaurant is open all night. Last night she nursed at least every 2 hours. And no, she is not almost 3 months, she is almost 3 YEARS.

    This morning, by noon, I am sure she had nursed 5 or 6 times.

    Good lord, I need a nursing vacation!

    I really believe I am doing the right thing by her, and she will wean eventually, but ... is anyone writing "Mothering your Nursing Preschooler" or "Mothering your Nursing Middle School Child" or "Mothering your College Freshman" because, DEAR GOD I think I will need to read those books.

    She has always loved the boob, but the last few days it has been non-stop. I'm thinking it's a developmental thing, or a growth spurt or something. Nothing different or stressful is going on at home (other than me being without sleep and a little whacked at the moment.)

    Anyway, someone, ANYONE, tell me they have been there. Tell me she will wean. Tell me she will sleep through the night.

    And god help you if you comment that your child slept through the night at 6 weeks and self-weaned at a year because I will hunt you down and hurt you. (That's the sleep deprivation talking.)

    OK women, say something comforting!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Oh FFS!

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nodaker View Post
    Anyway, someone, ANYONE, tell me they have been there. Tell me she will wean. Tell me she will sleep through the night.
    This for certain is true. Unless you plan on nursing a 30yo. Hang in there mama. If you need a nursing vacation, then take one. She's old enough to understand that mama needs a "time out".

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2008

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    I think your post is so funny I nearly fell off my chair laughing. In all seriousness, I am really sorry you're having a hard time with lo toay. HANG IN THERE! I've only made it to 16 months with my nursling. Have you ever set any boundaries for your lo? I'm not a pro and am only going by info I've read from the numerous posts. If you're uncomfortable giving "boob" as much as lo wants then it's ok for you to set some boundaries, after all, nursing should be mutually desireable.
    I'm Jill
    Mother to
    Bear 12/13/98
    Bagalli 8/5/07
    little (3/21/09).
    Kafessa: 5/17/10
    expecting 10/1/11

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2007

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    I am only in the trenches with you my dear! I have the same child as you but mine is 6 months younger.

    What I do like is at my LLL meetings the Leaders introduce themselves and say something like "I'm Lucy Leader, I have a 30 year old, a 27 yr old, and a 16 year old... and they are all weaned. They don't sleep with me anymore either." I don't know why but it's funny and makes me feel better all at the same time.
    I have however heard that teenagers are about as awful with sleeping (or worse, shudder) than toddlers.

    So, hang in there.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2007

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    This too will pass.

    Keep your chin up (or your boobs put up) mama!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2008

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    I haven't BTDT but I do want to offer this

    and this

    and if there were rest/sleep vibes I'd send those too
    Moma to *Silas* 10-30-07

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*nodaker View Post
    Good lord, I need a nursing vacation!
    And it's okay to take one!!! Can you sleep on the couch for a few nights and let your husband/partner take over the nighttime parenting for a while?

    Wait, maybe that's not a comforting thing to say. How about this, instead: you are totally a nursing warrior for sharing your body so selflessly for so many years. Not too many people could do what you've done. I hope someday your child comes to you and says "Mom, I don't know what to do with your grandchild. She wants to nurse all night long and she's nearly 3." On that day, I hope you can log onto the forum and find your post, and let her read it.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    St. Louis, MO

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    At least you are able to be good humored about it. I was when you used the word "breastaurant."

    Haven't BTDT either, but I just wanted to offer you some support.

    Setting boundaries sounds like a good idea to me.

    I'm Laura, mamma of 2



    We love and

    We have been nursing for over 2 years now!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2008

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    OMG! This was ME!!!! One year ago!!! When I first came here, why I first came here. I soooo wanted to wean. My daughter was nearly three, and then three and doing EXACTLY what you are talking about today.

    So here's how it went. I would get SO FRUSTRATED. I would feel like my nipples were going to fall off from overuse. And then, I would realise, she had a cold. Or, she would just stop with the all night stuff again. And I would get some sleep. And I would think 'ok nursing isn't sooo bad'.
    THIS TOO SHALL PASS. Honestly!

    We tried a lot too. I did start setting some limits. One limit was 'only at home' (really half the country had already seen my boobs, I didn't need or want to show the other half ). It was tough, but we were able to deal with that.

    We started co-sleeping part time. I would nurse her to sleep and then we would move her to her bed. If she woke up, she was welcome back in our bed again, so not so hard on her.

    When she was like 3 and 3 months we tried serious bribery 'you can get a big girl bike like your sister's if you stop with 'den'. Didn't work! I even went away for a business trip this past September for 5 days...she was fine without me, but the second I came home she started nursing like mad again!

    But now, and don't lose hope here, SHE IS WEANED! She turns 4 in February. I thought I would be nursing her through college. And guess what SHE DID IT HERSELF! Ok a little bribery...but she's perfectly fine with it.

    SO HANG IN THERE! You WILL get some sleep (eventually). She WILL wean (eventually).

    You're doing OK!

    Hope that helped?

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2008

    Default Re: Can I hear a "hang in there"?

    Thank you all so, so, SO much. It helps more than you know.

    As for boundaries, we actually do have some. We do have "only at home" unless it is an overnight trip or the like. We fly home to see my folks every other month and she knows that, unless there is an emergency, there will be no nursing on the plane or airport. (We were once on an unscheduled 12 hour layover and that rule was LIFTED!!)

    But when we are at home, and she asks to nurse for the 1000 time and I say "honey, momma needs just a little break. The nur nurs are tired." Her eyes well up with tears and she says "just a little nur nur?" I just feel rejecting her nursing feels like a rejection of HER and I don't know that she can seperate those two things yet. It's not just about the milk, you know?

    If we are out of the house she never even asks, but it is IN the house that she is crazed for the boob. And let me tell you, it is NOT about attention. She gets a lot of attention from both parents. We read for hours (literally) each day, she gets zero TV or screen time, my dusty house is a monument to how much quality time she gets with us. (And I am a SAHM.)

    As a side note, that is one of the things that made me LOL about suggested ways to help your child wean. One suggestions was to read to them. HELLO! When the child is on your lap the boobs are RIGHT THERE. Reading and nursing is her FAVORITE. If she can get dad to read while mom nurses, she is in nirvana.

    Anyway ... thank you all again. I know, I know, this too shall pass, but it is nice to have some help on the way. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

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