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Thread: Need Help Please!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    45

    Default Need Help Please!

    Ok, so here is my problem. My DD is 16 Months old, and she is still nursing, only at night. She has stopped nursing during the day b/c I work. Well I have to have Surgery on Tuesday. I'm going to be out of it for a couple of days, and I'm not going to be able to nurse. She also sleeps with us. I need help on weaning her off the breast. I don't want to stop for a couple of days and then start over. If I stop I just want to go ahead and do it...If anyone has any suggestions, I would GREATLY appreciate them. I want this to be as painless as possible! Thanks everyone!
    Wife to my childhood sweetheart Joey since 12/07/06
    Mother to my baby girl Abigail Rae Perkins born 08/05/07

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
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    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    It probably will not be enough time for your LO to adjust in time for your operation. Have you tried not offering at bedtime & using other comforting methods or maybe you could get her to take a substitute?

    I wish you lots of luck & hold on someone with more experience in this department will chime in soon


    "Children reinvent your world for you." Susan Sarandon

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    45

    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    She's very aggressive when it comes to nursing...she will stick her hand down my shirt, and say i want milk, and cry until she gets it. And I don't like to make her cry because I'm not giving her something that she really wants, and has had on demand since she was born. I essentially wanted to nurse until she was ready to stop, but this surgery has to happen, so I just don't know what to do.....Also I'm trying to move her to her own bed. She's just getting to big to sleep with me and daddy in our Queen size bed! I just need help! And I'm not a let her cry it out kind of Mom!!!
    Wife to my childhood sweetheart Joey since 12/07/06
    Mother to my baby girl Abigail Rae Perkins born 08/05/07

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
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    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    In *MY* opinion, that will be a whole lot for a 16 month old to deal with. Babies don't usually stop on their own until between 2& 4 years old. Will this also be the 1st time she has ever been away from you over night? Weaning and having to leave a family bed situation at the same time when they are not initiating either can be heartbreaking. And honestly based on the way you sound like you are parenting, I'm not sure it will work well for either of you.

    I am not saying don't try, I am saying be flexible. After two to three days of not being able to nurse, she may be desperate to reconnect. She may not be and your plan may work. But if reassuring her that she will be able to in a few days helps her get through the separation of being away you may want to be able to give her that light at the end of the tunnel. The truth is natural weaning is usually a process of one step forward, two steps back, two steps forward. Meaning normally, you would begin the process and have some nights where your child would sleep through the night away from you, some nights where your child would start in a space away from you and them come and find you and some nights where the idea of sleeping alone would just be too over whelming.
    So be flexible. Don't beat yourself up if it doesn't go the way you envision. And don't spend a bunch of time stressing over it either. It will either work out the way you hope or it won't. I would spend this time before hand talking to her about the fact that you have to have surgery and be away so she can mentally begin to prepare for that. Gage what you do after the fact from there. FTR, I have no doubt that she will be FINE while actually away from you if you are going to spend the night in the hospital. She understands that your DH can't nurse her. But being in the same house with you and not being able to may be much more confusing.
    Either way spend this week really enjoying your night time sessions as if everything goes smoothly they may be your last.
    Good Luck! And let us know how it goes!

    Way too lazy for formula

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    4,160

    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    Good luck with the surgery I hope you have a speedy recovery. I think you should concentrate on getting well yourself, and having your husband help out the nights you can't nurse her. Then remain flexible afterwards, she might be back on you like a steamroller for her nighttime nursies again.
    Lisa

    Mommy to
    Logan 5-23-07
    Colby 12-14-09

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    45

    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    Thanks for all of your help. DD has spent the night away before, so this won't be the first time, she's been away from me. And she actually does really good at Mimi and Papa's house. She only wakes once during the night, and then they give her a cup of milk and she's back to sleep. I'm really just concerned about the day after when I'm home, and on pain pills, and CAN'T nurse. I think we will still take her to the sitter on Wednesday, so by the time she gets home, maybe I can be off the Pain medication. Thanks for everything, and we will just go with the flow!!! I will let you know how it goes!
    Wife to my childhood sweetheart Joey since 12/07/06
    Mother to my baby girl Abigail Rae Perkins born 08/05/07

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    816

    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    mama and speedy recovery!
    I was just away from DD (same age as your LO) for 4 days/4 nights and when I got back she practically ripped my shirt off in order to nurse and she's never been a demanding kid for nursing. My plan had been not to offer if she didn't ask and if weaning happened, so be it. Well, obviously, she wasn't ready.

    Hopefully you'll have some help while you are home recovering. Maybe she can have a sleepover at your parents/inlaws/relatives for your first night back home?
    I'm Wendi.
    Mom to:
    DD1 7/28/07 for 21 mos and weaned with
    &
    DD2 12/16/09

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    miles from nowhere
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    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    Another thing to consider is whether you might be able to breastfeed with the kind of pain pills you'll be taking. Or whether you can get an alternative medication that is safe to take while breastfeeding. A lot of times the doctor or anesthesiologist doesn't actually know whether a med is safe to take while bfing so to be safe they tell you not to bf. I've heard a lot of BFing mamas have had luck contacting Dr. Jack Newman to ask questions about meds and BFing and he responds really quickly (you'll have to know what meds you'll be on, though). There are several mamas here who've had surgery and gone back to BFing right away.

    Good luck either way, I hope the surgery goes well.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    45

    Default Re: Need Help Please!

    Thanks everyone!!!!! I will keep you posted! I've decided, I'm not going to wean!!!! DD will be with Mimi and Papa Tuesday Night, and Wednesday at the sitter's. So by the time she gets home, I'm going to try and be off the pain meds! No weaning for us yet, she's just not ready, and neither am I!!!
    Wife to my childhood sweetheart Joey since 12/07/06
    Mother to my baby girl Abigail Rae Perkins born 08/05/07

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