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Thread: 16 month old regressing - irritates me

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default 16 month old regressing - irritates me

    less than two weeks ago my 136 month old reached for my breast. she was having a cold, so her father theorised that she was regressing because she wanted special comfort becuase she was sick.
    i accommodated, now she is better and wont sleep without my breast.
    she self-weaned at least five or so months ago. i'm past this and don't feel comfortable breast feeding her at this age. to me it seems like to encourage it is to promote an unhealthy dependency.
    i've also just got back to seeing my breasts as sex objects rather than functional tools and don't like the cognitive dissonance associated with nursing her now.....................................
    any thoughts.......................................... ...........

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Pullman, WA

    Default Re: 16 month old regressing - irritates me

    I wouldn't call your daughter's behavior "regressing."

    From what you said, it sounds like she weaned at 11 months. How did she wean? how quickly? was it easy on her or hard on her? what has her behavior been like until she got sick?

    Many babies around the world breast feed much longer than one year. It is normal and healthy for them to do so. From what I've read, babies don't tend to self-wean until they are older than 18 months or so. Many are 2-3 years old at least. Again, normal, healthy, appropriate behavior. Some babies get very distractible around 10-12 months and "strike" or forget to nurse very often. It's easy to take this as self-weaning, but it's not. And that is most apparent when they come back to breast. Babies who wean too early often come back and want to nurse often for a while, just to reassure themselves that mama is still available to them. Babies who wean early also tend to be a little clingier than babies who self-wean. It's an incorrect myth that long-term nursers have unhealthy dependencies. Studies show these babies tend to be more independent children later on (preschool, etc.).

    Here's a good link on nursing beyond one year:

    It's actually a link to lots of articles/links. Especially check out the "fact sheet" and the "links" sections. Good stuff.

    All of that being said, you still have to decide for yourself. If you read about it and look at the benefits of nursing a toddler and decide you can't continue, you will have to re-wean her. My suggestion is to do it slowly and gently if possible. Remember that she is doing what comes naturally to her, especially since she's been ill. Wait til she's well and start cutting out nursing sessions slowly.

    Hope this helps.
    Stephanie, mom to Jaime Hoban 11/04/07 and Annika Jayne 12/21/09

    We . . . no room in the bed for more!

    We love our cloth diapers!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: 16 month old regressing - irritates me

    this is very va;luable thank you
    my "facts" have in fact been myths

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