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Thread: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

  1. #1

    Default Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    Hi all. I'm a new poster. My LO is 10 weeks old, and I've been in some sort of pain from BFing since day 1. At best it's been mild, and at worst, excrutiating.

    I've seen an IBCLC twice and things improved my first week after delivery -- I had horrendous trauma to both nipples -- but I've never gone a day without pain. I still have cracks and I think I'm still getting abraded by my LO's strong suction. After things got better the first time, I probably made a mistake and tried the side-lying position for a night which didn't help. He's drawn blood a few times, including once when we ended up at the emergency room when he spat up blood and it wasn't obvious that it came from me (until we repeated the process there and I realized it was coming from my right side.)

    I have a compounded problem in that I also have oversupply. I've been feeding only one side each time as recommended by the IBCLC. This was two weeks ago. The IBCLC I saw recommended I pump in addition to feed in order to heal my deep wounds and give my breasts a rest, but when I tried that, my oversupply got even worse. I would turn on the pump, not even on "expression" phase just to get things started, and I would turn off the pump and proceed to leak/eject 3-3.5 ounces from the one side and leak 1 ounce from the side that was supposed to be resting. Because this only caused more problems, I ended up just putting up with the pain and feeding my LO directly.

    My LO is otherwise doing fine -- 1-2 poopy diapers a day, lots of wet ones, seems happy, gaining weight like crazy -- but he has absolutely no schedule. One day he'll want to feed every 2 hours, one day every 4. Night time is worse -- sometimes 3 hours, sometimes 5 or 6. One day he even went 9. I don't know if I'll ever regulate with this "schedule". He feeds anywhere from 16-40 min. still as well.

    Anyway, the pain is awful again, and I feel like I'm in my own personal hell. I'm trying not to show how awful I feel to my LO, but it's wearing me out. I've never tried so hard at something only to feel like such a complete failure. I've tried everything -- Lansinoh, APNO, salt water rinse, air drying, sun drying. I suspect I still need to fix the latch somehow, but I really don't know how to do it on my own. I've tried pushing down on my LO's chin to get a wider opening, but he moves back to a position he likes at some point during the feeding. I'm going to call a different IBCLC tomorrow and see if she can help me more than my current one, but other than that, I'm pretty much at my wit's end about things getting better.

    I really want to BF (even if I have to include pumping), but the last few nights, I've gotten really frustrated. BF hasn't been easy, or convenient.

    Will things ever get better? People I've talked to claim you actually get to a point, even after a rough start, where you forget how painful it used to be, where things are so easy you don't even realize your baby is latched on. Is this true? I just have such a hard time believing it will happen to me. I feel a bit of guilt writing this post. I know other moms go through much worse, and I feel like my baby's well-being should be strong enough motivation, but 3 months of pain is really getting to me.

    Thanks for listening and for any advice.
    Last edited by @llli*klizzie; September 21st, 2008 at 11:33 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    sorry your haveing a tough time...

    It is going to get beter! Sometimes it takes cracks ages to heal...

    Did you lc check the baby for tounge tie?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    4,007

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.



    lots of mama!

    Here is a great site for some videos that show how to latch baby properly (on the right side of the page are some links to videos about latching)

    http://www.thebirthden.com/Newman.html
    ~Jenn~


    mother of 2 boys!
    08/14/98~~03/20/08

    Birth: 7lbs 12oz, 1 year: 22lbs 11oz
    until he self-weaned 4 days before his third birthday ... still on occasion ... and happily

    ************************************************** ************************************************** *****************
    People need to understand that when they're deciding between breastmilk and formula, they're not deciding between Coke and Pepsi.... They're choosing between a live, pure substance and a dead substance made with the cheapest oils available. ~Chele Marmet

  4. #4

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    Hi -- yes, the IBCLC checked at her initial visit to make sure his frenulum (sp?) was ok, and it was. Whenever she put on the latch, it never hurt (guess she managed to get enough of a deep latch), but I can't seem to do it myself. I've looked at all the videos online (Dr. Newman, Dr. Sears, kellymom)...not sure what I'm doing wrong Guess just more practice??

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    4,007

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*klizzie View Post
    Hi -- yes, the IBCLC checked at her initial visit to make sure his frenulum (sp?) was ok, and it was. Whenever she put on the latch, it never hurt (guess she managed to get enough of a deep latch), but I can't seem to do it myself. I've looked at all the videos online (Dr. Newman, Dr. Sears, kellymom)...not sure what I'm doing wrong Guess just more practice??
    can you get in contact with your local LLL leader? Maybe she could help with some hands on latch help
    ~Jenn~


    mother of 2 boys!
    08/14/98~~03/20/08

    Birth: 7lbs 12oz, 1 year: 22lbs 11oz
    until he self-weaned 4 days before his third birthday ... still on occasion ... and happily

    ************************************************** ************************************************** *****************
    People need to understand that when they're deciding between breastmilk and formula, they're not deciding between Coke and Pepsi.... They're choosing between a live, pure substance and a dead substance made with the cheapest oils available. ~Chele Marmet

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    thats good.... lots of babies with tounge time make thier moms missarably cracked and bleeding..
    Lots of babies with out tounge tie do also.

    ARe you having burning pain?

    Heres a page on thrush, any time you have a crack you have to think about thrush cause it thrives in wet dark places

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/thrush/index.html


    what are you putting on your nipples?
    Heres a page about healing cracks

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...lehealing.html

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Maine
    Posts
    255

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    If you feel something is wrong with the latch, follow your instincts. I have been in my own hell b/c 2 LCs and a ped missed my son's posterior tongue-tie and lip-tie. I kept asking them to look, something was wrong, but they said it looked fine. Now he is 10 weeks old and after his procedure will have to start all over again. Your problem may be different, but my point is that momma is usually right. Go with what you feel.

    Just a thought, sometimes cranio-sacral therapy done by either an osteopath or pediatric chiropractor can help loosen jaw tension and allow LOs mouth to open wider.

    I hope that things get better for you. I think someone already suggested this, but a LLL leader who could come and give hands on help would be good. There is also a forum on oversupply where you might be able to find more suggestions. Hang in there. You are not alone in your suffering, and you are doing great. It will get better.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    303

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*klizzie View Post

    My LO is otherwise doing fine -- 1-2 poopy diapers a day, lots of wet ones, seems happy, gaining weight like crazy -- but he has absolutely no schedule. One day he'll want to feed every 2 hours, one day every 4. Night time is worse -- sometimes 3 hours, sometimes 5 or 6. One day he even went 9. I don't know if I'll ever regulate with this "schedule". He feeds anywhere from 16-40 min. still as well.
    Babies dont have to be on a feeding schedule. Youre right- some babies do eat every few hours though or go long times between feedings, its normal. Now if you had wrote that your baby can go several hours and you have to try to wake LO up- then id be worried about more issues than latch or a schedule. The "schedule" your LO will get worked out and become more regular. Growth spurts, for example can cause crazy feedings.

    as far as everything else, Have you had lo checked for High Pallette (sp?)? my DD2 wouldnt latch very well either and i was in awful pain, she drew blood once too. i thought for sure she was tongue tied like my other 2, but she wasnt- she just has a high pallette. It took latching correctly and correct positioning to get it right.

    this is what i was told to do (you can always just try it):
    get your boppy or other pillows right under baby. Have baby lay straight at your breast- LEVEL with your breast. (thats important). Then bring baby straight onto your breast- dont bring your breast to baby. you have to do this every feeding until LO learns.
    for high pallette babies, instead of your roof of your mouth being a normal dome, it has an extra dome and your nipple gets caught in the dome and rubs your nipple, etc-- so by positioning straight on to feed, the nipple wont get caught.

    If seeing 2 LC you still have pain and no solution, id say a LLL leader would be a better bet. HUGS.
    Mommy to:
    Nathaniel 2/28/05
    Boy/Girl Twins: Raymond 17w4d & Candice 5/22/06
    Lana 12/22/07

    Missing Wylder 9w5d
    TTCAL for another nursling!

  9. #9

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    Thanks all. Interesting...I just checked the leader listed for my city's LLL group as suggested, and I'm pretty sure she's the same IBCLC that I saw. I guess I'll try a different IBCLC this week as soon as possible and see if she has any tips.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    1,197

    Default Re: Will it ever be enjoyable? Sorry about the long post.

    It WILL get better. Once the baby gets better at controlling her head she will latch herself without any help and they always do it properly since it is the best way for them to get the milk out. You have already been through the worst. First 3 months are the hardest. After that it gets far easier in terms of latch issues.

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