Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    118

    Default Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    now I'm not sure. DD is almost one year old. Originally, like many mamas, I intended to breastfeed for one year and then wean. Then, several months into it, I decided to do baby-led weaning, or until age 2. Now that she is almost a year old, I'm finding myself tired of nursing and not enjoying it as much as I used to. It depends on the time of day, for me. Nursing as soon as DD wakes up in the morning is nice, because we're both in good moods and relaxed. I feel warm fuzzies! However, during the daytime, I'm so busy with homeschooling and doing household chores that I get frustrated when I have to stop what I'm doing to nurse. DD will take a bottle of EBM or a sippy of water sometimes, but when she's tired or cranky, she just wants to nurse, and nothing will appease her until I let her have it! At times like these, when I have so much to do and so little time, I just wish she'd take a bottle! At bedtime, she has me under her thumb, so to speak. When she's winding down, she must have me in the bed with her. She'll nurse for a minute or two, sit up and play a minute, then get restless and want to nurse for another couple of minutes, then play, and so on. Sometimes this drags on for an hour or more before she finally nurses to sleep. I simply cannot do this every night! However, during the night, she wakes at least twice to nurse, and I don't mind it, because I'd much rather nurse her in bed than to have to get up and get a bottle!

    So, a few days ago, I made the decision to try partially weaning her at a year. I'm trying to actually start right now, but I'm not sure how to go about doing it. My goal was to get to where she nurses only during the night and first thing in the morning (I'd probably keep the bedtime nursing sessions, too, as that has always been the only way that she'll go to sleep). I don't know what to do about naps, though. She nurses to sleep for naps, too.

    And then, today, I started having second thoughts. I started feeling failure, because I'd gone against my plan of baby-led weaning, and instead gave in to my own selfishness. But, my son needs me, too, and I frequently have to put his school lessons on hold, or put off his questions, so that I can go nurse DD to sleep. I just don't know what to do. I love the fact that I can always turn to nursing whenever DD is hungry, irritable, tired, cuddly, etc.

    I don't really know what my question is here, or if I even have a question. I just need some advice and encouragement, I suppose.

    Wife to the wonderful Joe Tran
    Stay-At-Home-Mom since 12/07
    First born son Noah, born 3/23/97, 8 lbs 1 oz, 20 1/4"
    New baby girl, born 9/13/07, 8 lbs 7 oz, 20"

    Blissfully breastfeeding, babywearing, co-sleeping, and cloth-diapering mama.
    "As newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the Word, that you may grow thereby" (1 Peter 2:2)

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    1,177

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    I understand about being frustrated w/ nursing down for naps. I watch kids in my home and it is a pain to get DS to sleep. But just a thought if you got rid of the nursing for naps it doesn't necessarily mean she'll just go to sleep by herself. You'll probably have to take the time to rock/walk etc to get her to sleep.

    Jenn
    Mom to - DD1 10/5/05, DS 6/27/07 & DD2 6/18/09

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    138

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    She sounds like my nearly one year old. I also homeschool my 11th grader and have a 3 year old around the house. Yes, there are moments when it can be incinvenient to stop everything to nurse, but also by a year old, she should be able to wait a few minutes, while being held, so you can finish a lesson with your son. You may also be able to distract her for a short time with acracker or some other finger food so you can work with him. Keep in mind too that one if the advantages of homeschooling is time flexibility. Can you work with him while she is alseep? even if it isn't his usual schedule? For example, usually DD and I do school in the morning while the 3 year old is at preschool but yesterday she wanted to go shopping with a friend and spent the whole day out. We did school in the evening after dinner. I also agree with pp that you will just end up spending time rocking her to sleep anyway so giving up nursing to naps is probably not a help.
    SAHM mom to 5 daughters-16,15,13,3,10 months Happy Wife to stressed out, overworked husband

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,110

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    Can you nurse while you are teaching your son? I work from home and have a nanny that takes care of her but after her naps she always wants to nurse for about 1/2 hour and I bring her with me to my computer and she nurses while I work. It's great cause I can keep doing things while she nurses. She nurses sitting on my lap, facing me so that way I don't need my arms to hold her.

    I'm sure you'll find the way that works best for you

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,780

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    If you are having second thoughts on weaning, then my opinion is that's your mama gut telling you you and your lo are not ready. I think you have gotten some great ideas above and hope they have helped you with the answers you were looking for!

    You can do this! You lo will not be little forever and these are all precious moments, even the tough ones! !
    Kelly

    Mommy to Gabriel born 12/25/06 Breastfed 12/25/06 - 12/09 and possibly here and there still
    Madelyn born 9/24/09 delivered at home and caught by my husband

    "To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right."

  6. #6

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*tranmama View Post
    now I'm not sure. DD is almost one year old. Originally, like many mamas, I intended to breastfeed for one year and then wean. Then, several months into it, I decided to do baby-led weaning, or until age 2. Now that she is almost a year old, I'm finding myself tired of nursing and not enjoying it as much as I used to. It depends on the time of day, for me. Nursing as soon as DD wakes up in the morning is nice, because we're both in good moods and relaxed. I feel warm fuzzies! However, during the daytime, I'm so busy with homeschooling and doing household chores that I get frustrated when I have to stop what I'm doing to nurse. DD will take a bottle of EBM or a sippy of water sometimes, but when she's tired or cranky, she just wants to nurse, and nothing will appease her until I let her have it! At times like these, when I have so much to do and so little time, I just wish she'd take a bottle! At bedtime, she has me under her thumb, so to speak. When she's winding down, she must have me in the bed with her. She'll nurse for a minute or two, sit up and play a minute, then get restless and want to nurse for another couple of minutes, then play, and so on. Sometimes this drags on for an hour or more before she finally nurses to sleep. I simply cannot do this every night! However, during the night, she wakes at least twice to nurse, and I don't mind it, because I'd much rather nurse her in bed than to have to get up and get a bottle!

    So, a few days ago, I made the decision to try partially weaning her at a year. I'm trying to actually start right now, but I'm not sure how to go about doing it. My goal was to get to where she nurses only during the night and first thing in the morning (I'd probably keep the bedtime nursing sessions, too, as that has always been the only way that she'll go to sleep). I don't know what to do about naps, though. She nurses to sleep for naps, too.

    And then, today, I started having second thoughts. I started feeling failure, because I'd gone against my plan of baby-led weaning, and instead gave in to my own selfishness. But, my son needs me, too, and I frequently have to put his school lessons on hold, or put off his questions, so that I can go nurse DD to sleep. I just don't know what to do. I love the fact that I can always turn to nursing whenever DD is hungry, irritable, tired, cuddly, etc.

    I don't really know what my question is here, or if I even have a question. I just need some advice and encouragement, I suppose.
    We homeschool too!

    This is just my 2nd official year of official homeschooling, but I know from experience, it can be pretty frustrating with a toddler. I've gotten a ton of wonderful ideas from other homeschooling moms about how to deal with a toddler while homeschooling.

    One thing that I found from experience, was that after the one year old point, that baby started to space out nursing sessions on his own, and it became much more predictable and easy to tell when he was going to want to nurse. After a year, my youngest also started to really get a big appetite for solids, and also gave up his morning nap at about 14-15 mos. Last school year, my youngest was about 1.5, and I found that he would nurse in the morning, and we'd have breakfast right away and start school right away. Sometimes during breakfast We'd start with our Bible lesson first and move on from there. With that schedule, I'd be able to do school for awhile, offer the kids a snack during lessons, and then have lunch, all without generally needing to nurse as long as I kept the snacks flowing and kept lo busy. After lunch, I'd take a break and nurse lo down for his nap, and finish up whatever school we hadn't finished yet with my oldest while lo was sleeping.

    I found it really helped to have a LOT of playdough on hand, and cookie cutters and play dough tools. I also had toys like this for my 1 year old:http://www.rainbowresource.com/produ...933318-1173094 and this http://www.rainbowresource.com/produ...933318-1173094 and this http://www.melissaanddoug.com/dyn_pr...Sorting%20Cube and this http://www.fisher-price.com/fp.aspx?...iant&pid=38607 All of these things were his "school" toys only. We played with them together during school.

    I also found that he thought he was in the same class as his big brother, and wanted to do exactly what big brother was doing, so it really helped me to bring him into the equation instead of trying to exclude him and get him to occupy himself. When big brother did his handwriting, my youngest got a crayon and plain paper to "write" his letters on even though they were scribbles. When I printed out math worksheets, I always printed out 2 copies even though a 1 year old couldn't really do them, lol. Free coloring pages printed out really helped too, so lo thought he was doing his school work.

    I also heard of a suggestion to get a ton of fun learning toys and manipulatives for the youngers and put them in seperate plastic boxes in a closet marked with a day of the week. So for instance, Monday, would have certain fun activities for Monday only and Tuesday would have different things and so on.

    As far as weaning itself goes, my experience really was that things tend to slow down anyway after age 1, and that personally, once age 1 hit, I didn't feel bad if I needed to ask ds to wait a bit while I finished something up, and offer him a snack instead. I just considered it part of learning to be a part of our family, where ds wasn't the only child in the family. I never considered it weaning really...just learning that sometimes you need to take turns, and learn to wait, and that those were good lessons to learn anyway. My youngest still nurses actually, and he's 2.5 now. So those limits didn't actually even cause him to wean fully...just taught him a little about sharing mom's time with his brother I think.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    611

    Default Re: Thought I wanted to wean, but...

    I thought I would only nurse till age 1 too... then my lo turned one and I realized that she wasn't ready to wean. I however was burnt out by the bedtime ritual and nursing her in her room.. it took forever. I had nursed her to sleep every single night of her life...
    so I let Dh take over the bedtime routine... and now I feel alot better about continuing to nurse. I still nurse my lo before bed.. only I do it in the liviing room and she only nurses for maybe 3-5 min.. then daddy handles, stories, prayers, getting her to sleep etc etc.- the best part is I don't get stuck sitting in her room for an hour with her latching on and off! Don't know if this would work for you??
    My lo is 15 m and still nurses 4-6 times a day. If she asks and its only been a bit since her last nursing I offer her a snack. She is a big time grazer and I think have a snack to munch on keeps her busy. I give her a container of dry cereal or a rice cake or something that takes a good 10 min to munch on and she gets distracted with it.

    Married my man Michael 5/12/2006
    Keira Joyce 6/1/07 Breastfed for 22 months Peanut Allergy- Outgrown 11/2010!!!!
    Israel Benedict 10/10/09- Breastfed for 27 months ( 9 months tandem with his sister)
    Nairi Anne 4/1/2011 still nursing at 14 months
    My Daily Blog
    Cloth diapers on the bum!

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •