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Thread: I've made my decision....

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Surprise, AZ
    Posts
    3,026

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*brittan View Post
    that must be so tough! Have you read how weaning happens, that might be helpful. I would drop down to morn, noon and night and then go slowly from there. I would not shorten his length though. Just drop to that and then one feed at a time from there.
    I did this with Ian. When I dropped his final night feeding he did cry some, but I just held him (if he'd let me) & talk softly & let him know I love him. It only lasted a couple nights. Even with Erin nursing he doesn't get jealous & he seems perfectly happy. Good luck, he'll be okay!
    Steff, proud mom to:
    Ian (6) born naturally
    breastfed from 7/3/06 to 6/16/08
    &
    Erin (4) born naturally (with Hypnobirthing)
    breastfed from 5/18/08 to around 5/18/10
    &
    Seamus (3), my allergy baby, born naturally (with slacker Hypnobirthing) breastfed from 12/28/09 to 8/20/11
    &
    Connor (1) breastfed from 12/28/11 to current



    Ian's age ticker Erin's age ticker Seamus' age ticker
    Connor's age ticker


  2. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    8,591

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Gosh, Mama! I'm sooo sorry this is happening. I didn't follow your earlier threads, and I'm sure you have looked into it, but there's no way you can continue to nurse, right? You've looked into the med?

    Distraction is a good method and dropping nursing sessions is probably best. I don't find that decreasing the length of the session has been at all effective at slowing dd's nursing. How much does he understand? Can you tell him they are broken? Sore? Tired? Do any of those work?


    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    The N O ;)
    Posts
    224

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    What has to be has to be

    Do the best you can with what you have to work with - make it all work out Mama



    "Children reinvent your world for you." Susan Sarandon

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    2,538

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Autumn
    Moma to *Silas* 10-30-07

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    1,987

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    You might try shortening sessions and see how it goes. As moose mentioned, it doesn't work for everyone, but it did work well for us. I couldn't handle nursing for long with pregnancy, so I would count to 10 when I was ready to be done (DS was 2). He did well with this (most of the time) and it helped us as we dropped some sessions.

    I agree with pp about possibly not weaning completely. It is something you have to decide, but if your lo is only getting a couple of ounces during a once a day session, it would probably be a very small amount of medication involved.
    DS 1/2006 9 lb. 2 oz. 22 in.
    DD 10/2008 8 lb, 2 oz. 20 in.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    2,453

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Thanks for all the suppport, llladies. I need it. I can't believe I am doing this to my Zachary - taking away his most favorite thing in the world. It really does seem to be the right thing, though, from a big-picture perspective.

    Based on my doctor's information and my research, it really isn't safe to continue bfing while on methotrexate. Its actually a chemotherapy drug (also the one given to induce miscarriage in nonviable pregnancies) although my dose will be considerably lower than a cancer patient would take. Its not clear to me why it works for auto-immune disorders, but it does. Its a weekly dose and is categorized as an L5 when taken for a chronic condition. Even though only a small amount gets in breastmilk, Hale recommends pumping & dumping for 4 days minimum before resuming bfing because of its extreme toxicity and I think he's talking about when its taken for a short time. It just doesn't seem like the type of thing to mess around with.

    I've looked into different drugs. There are some bf-compatable meds used for my condition. But my doctor explained (and this concurs with what I have read and heard from other people with Stills) that those drugs are used as "boosters" when one of the more powerful drugs is not enough. On their own they wouldn't be effective for this.

    Zach did well yesterday nursing only three times. He asked a bit, but only got really upset once. (That was when naptime got delayed because MORGAN SWOLLOWED A GOOGLEY-EYE from her craft box.) We tried to stay busy, spent a lot of time outside, had some special snacks, and watched a few extra videos when I was hurting too bad to play. So far so good this morning too. On the bright side, maybe this will make me a more creative mommy trying to keep Z's mind on other things.

    I think we'll probably drop the bedtime nursing first. He's pretty distracted during it already and DH is there to help. I'll worry about the other two after we take care of the first, though I may try to shorten the naptime session so that he's not nursing all the way to sleep.

    I am trying to convince myself that Zachary will be okay through this. He's just too young to understand and I hope he doesn't think I don't love him anymore. He's very emotional and a little slow on the uptake when it comes to certain things. He's going to think its completely arbitrary and mean. He doesn't give up easily either. I so afraid that I'm going to have to be telling him "no milk" for years to come. I can't handle seeing him upset over this. I still have unlimited hugs and kisses and cuddles and stories and songs for him, but will it be enough?

    Sorry for going on and on and on. I'd hoped to wean him when I knew he was at a point where he would take to it well. I don't think he's at that point right now. This is really tearing me apart and I'm feeling like a terrible terrible mother. Thanks for "listening".
    Last edited by @llli*FluffyN; July 22nd, 2008 at 10:45 AM.
    Katie
    Just one more fanatical cloth diaper convert...
    Mom to Morgan (01/10/04) and Zachary (07/12/06)
    What are M & Z up to now?

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    8,591

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    You are NOT a terrible mother. A terrible mother wouldn't take into account his feelings and go through the pain you have to continue this long. A terrible mother would wean abruptly and go on the meds now. A terrible mother would not have done the research. You are a terrific mother who has a health condition that is requiring you to wean. Your kids need you pain free more than he needs mama's milk--its not like he's 6 months old afterall. You are doing a great job!!!!

    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Charleston SC
    Posts
    2,601

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    You are doing a great job!!

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*moose View Post
    You are NOT a terrible mother. A terrible mother wouldn't take into account his feelings and go through the pain you have to continue this long. A terrible mother would wean abruptly and go on the meds now. A terrible mother would not have done the research. You are a terrific mother who has a health condition that is requiring you to wean. Your kids need you pain free more than he needs mama's milk--its not like he's 6 months old afterall. You are doing a great job!!!!
    Oh, Katie. I really wish I could give you a real, live hug right now! It does sound like you are doing a great job and I think you and Zachary will get there.
    If you feel he will think you are being arbitrarily "mean," perhaps Erin's suggestion to tell him they are sick might help.
    Did Morgan "pass" the googley eye yet?

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    1,967

    Default Re: I've made my decision....

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*FluffyN View Post

    I still have unlimited hugs and kisses and cuddles and stories and songs for him, but will it be enough?
    It is absolutely enough! You are a great mom Katie and nursing is not the one thing that gives Z love and security, even if it has played a big role. Not to mention that two years is nothing to sneeze at. I really do believe that Z will be fine. NO transistion is going to be easy on him but it doesn't mean that it is going to cause him harm in any way. Coping with change is all something we have to learn and I know that you will do everything he needs to help him get through this.

    I think it is very common to feel guilt for weaning. I experienced it for sure. You are doing what you need to do and no one is judging you for it, especially not Z.

    I am so sorry that you are feeling forced into this and that you are back to feeling so terrible. Praying for all of you guys and especially for you to feel better quickly.


    Misty
    Loving my two sweet girls Audrey (7/18/06) and Annie (6/18/09) Baby #3 due to appear 8/5/10

    Feel free to ask me about my successful HBAC , food allergies, cloth diapers, and the joy of having a high-needs, non-sleeping little dear who has grown into a wonderful preschooler.

    Blogging here.

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