I just need to write. I'm not sure if this is the right forum to be posting in really but I am not in the right frame of mind to worry about it too much. If you are reading this, please post your ideas, I am in need of some reassurance. We are trying to work towasrds my dh being able to seettle our ds age 16m at night, they take expressed milk, read stories and altho there are tears, it is usually not too bad. right now they are trying to resettle as bill woke as he often does this time of night. he often wants milk and so dh has 4oz in a bottle. just now i am listening to my dh trying his very best to soothe with bill screaming and crying and getting very high pitched. i feel like i am being tortured. i never wanted to put any of us through this. i tried to talk to my mum about it but she is real old-school and can't quite see why i have issues listening to my son cry, also dh feels that i undermine him and am making it unfair if i intervene. please tell me how i reconcile this. this goes against every instinct i have, i simply feel that we are teaching my son that i will not come no matter how distressed he gets, everyone else tells me that is what he wants and that i am letting him manipulate me - dh just wants to be able to comfort his ds. what do i do here?