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Thread: What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    59

    Default What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

    Hi.

    I am new to the boards, but I am a member of my local LLL, so I am familiar with the types of discussions.

    My concern, really it is DH's, but I need some feedback to back myself up when we are discussing this.

    We have one child, DD, who just turned 1 a week ago. She has never really been a big car fan, and yesterday, became rather fussy and when she does that, she won't give up until out of the car. Is this normal? I think she was bored and wanted to crawl around and play, DH was frustrated b/c we are trying to find a new house and we were going to open houses at the time. It is a "heated" discussion we get into from time to time. I told my mom I wouldn't come up for a family reunion this weekend b/c it is 3 hrs. both ways and we would have to do it in a day. I fear she would freak and we would not have fun at all, plus I don't want to do that to DD, it isn't fair.

    Another concern is the way my dd goes to bed. I am still EBFing
    with the addition of solids and some water. She nurses to sleep. For the longest time, I will nurse her to sleep at bedtime, she will go down and then be up again to nurse about 30-60 minutes later and then back down. Am I doing something wrong? DH is really supportive with BFing, but from time to time he will comment about how she doesn't go to bed well. I ,too, wish she wouldn't get right back up because I sometimes feel I can't do anything b/c she might wake up. Any ideas? Overall DD is a happy child, just very determined...doesn't like staying in her stroller anymore or carseat..need some tips.

    Thanks.

    Megan

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

    Wow! This sounds a lot like my son!! Only my son is a little younger he will be 9mths in about a week. He has NEVER liked the carseat. There have only been a handful of times were he will actually fall asleep in the carseat or be happy playing w/ a toy. I'm thinking maybe when we can turn the carseat around he might like it better? Is your dd's carseat facing front yet? My son also nurses to fall asleep. Last night though he actually stopped nursing when he was done and let me rock him to sleep!! I guess maybe this is something they grow out of on their own time??? I'm sorry I'm really no help as i'm almost in the same boat.. but just thought i'd let ya know your not the only one!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    2,178

    Default Re: What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

    Your dd is totally normal for her age. I've heard of kids who really like riding in the car for long periods of time, but so far, I haven't seen it. We have 2...(a 3yr old and a 4 month old), and we have problems all the time (not with our oldest anymore though...so remember it will get better).

    It really helped us for one of us to ride in the backseat when our oldest was that age when there was a freaking out episode...we also noticed that we needed to get a new carseat when baby was about 7 mos. old...the infant carrier style wasn't padded enough (even though it was rated near the top by consumer reports when we bought it), and baby was too long to be comfortable in it. We went to a combination rear facing or front facing seat that stayed in the car and covered baby from 5 lbs to like 35 pounds. Graco ComfortSport I think. It has lots more padding and a cup holder. Baby loved it. In our state babies need to be rear facing until 20lbs (i think) and 1 year old (not one or the other, but both). If your baby has hit the higher weight limit for your state's laws, you could consider turning her so that she's front facing...it really helped us...baby felt more like a member of the family and we could play a little and hand out toys and drinks when needed.

    We have also found that kids have pretty short attention spans. We took ours looking for a new house just a couple of weeks ago. We didn't even do the open house thing yet, just checking out listings we'd found to see if we wanted to actually do a tour, and they were good for about an hour of driving. I would suggest finding a sitter to actually go to open houses and tour homes. You will be much more comfortable and so will your dd. Even if you only get an hour or hour and a half away, you will get soooo much more done. Plus, dd probably doesn't want to ride in the car and go to open houses anyway...nothing for a baby to do there.

    My first lo nursed to sleep all the time, and there came a point when lo was about a year old that you could nurse to sleep and then baby would wake up soon afterwards and you'd feel like you needed to nurse again to get baby to sleep because that was what worked well...you were used to it, and it was sooo quick. However, you also never get anything else done. If you want, you could try having your dh get dd to sleep after the first waking...or substituting nursing the second time with a toy or pacifier(if you're not opposed to them) or some other thing that helps comfort her and tell her that she already nursed, and that it's time for sleep now. Once they're that age, they can usually understand a little better and it's not so bad.

    As far as the really long trip (i think you said 3 hrs each way in one day), I totally understand. I'm not sure a little one like yours is ready for that unless you and your dh are ready for many many stops. We took a little day trip a few weeks ago, and I swear we stopped 3 times in what was supposed to be a 2.5 hour trip there. It went well, but my husband had forgotten how may times little ones need to stop. The more stops, the better the trip.

    Lastly, we found a Kelty Backpack to carry our oldest in and he thought it was great. It's a good alternative to a stroller...especially since one year olds don't have much endurance for walking. Our's also preferred a shopping cart to a stroller (although i'm a little germaphobic, so i wipe it out with a clorox wipe during cold and flu season)

    hope that helps! Best of Luck!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    59

    Default Re: What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

    Thanks to both of you... I got a lot out of what Mommie to 2 said. I am pretty relaxed about the whole thing. I work with kids for a living and realize, that one has to always be flexible. It is just DH (lately) has these expectations that are kind of off base. Don't get me wrong, he is a great daddy, just needs some coaching on what is okay to expect. Our DD is 1 and has been on the low end of the weight scale, if she is 20 pounds, she is just there. I will find out exactly next week at her 12 month appointment. I think turning the carseat around may help...thanks for giving me hope! WE got rid of our carrier around 8 months b/c she just didn't like it anymore. My DH just got a Deuter backpack carrier off of ebay, so we shall see how DD likes it. I have an Ergocarrier, which dd isn't always fond of, but it could be that she was hot the last time I used it. Our problem with the carriers is that even though she is old enought to be alert and like them, she is short, so it is hard for her to see around our big heads . The sitter idea was a good one, and one we need to try. DD hasn't been with a sitter, except her daycare ladies, whom she loves. My MIL is close by, so we need to try that. I think the next time we go out to look at houses, we will have to try the sitter, even if mommy and daddy aren't ready for it Thanks for your replies...I felt kind of silly after I wrote my post, but you made me feel better. I will keep working on the bedtime thing. It is so hard to get out of a habit.


    Thanks.
    Megan

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    281

    Default Re: What is "normal" for 1 y.o.?

    Turning the car seat around completely changed our lives. Ds would fuss every minute he was in the car before we turned the car seat around. I dreaded even driving across town, let alone the 3 hours it takes to get to my parents' house.

    I think it's pretty universal that you're not supposed to turn the car seat around until baby is 1 year old AND 20 pounds. The 20 pounds is what held us up. Ds was 19.5 pounds when he turned 1. The pediatrician told us we were close enough, but we waited just in case. We finally turned his car seat around at about 13 months. Again, I can't say enough how much it changed our lives. He's a completely different kid in the car now.

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