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Thread: Really struggling...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2007

    Default Really struggling...

    I have been breastfeeding my DS for 21 months now and things have been going okay. I have a high pressure job and am finding it really difficult to manage work and home life. I rush around in the morning getting myself ready for work (I leave at 6am), luckily we have a carer who works from my house to take care of LO, then dash off to work, it's a whirlwind of meetings, briefings, work etc, rush home (stop and do shopping if needed), cook dinner before DH gets home - he gets home around 7pm and LO goes to bed at around 7:30, get LO to bed - I just never seem to have any time. I still pump at work once a day (which is sometimes so hard to find the 20 mins needed - a real juggling act). Today I feel tired and a little depressed. Motherhood and a full time job is really tough, especially when you have a high needs child who doesn't sleep through and still wakes several times a night - I guess I just need a little encouragement. I basically have about 30 mins once I put LO to bed and then I go to bed myself because LO is up so often - have tried Dr Gordon method not working, but I am just so damn tired all the time, I just feel physically exhausted and mentally fatigued. Does anyone else feel the same way?

    Mother to Zayne 19/8/06 2.56kg

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2008

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    Ahh not really any advise just hugs I can understand being tired and feeling burdened at times. I sure hope your days will get easier soon. You're doing a great job!! I can't believe you're still pumping, that's awesome. That's the one thing I am ready to give up on. As soon as my lo reaches one year I'm going to hang up the horns and continue to bf at home. Of course, she doesn't have any allergies I'm aware of. You go girl! You're a rockin' mama! Hang in there
    I'm Jill
    Mother to
    Bear 12/13/98
    Bagalli 8/5/07
    little (3/21/09).
    Kafessa: 5/17/10
    expecting 10/1/11

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2008

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    first of all s to you for all you do for your family! a couple of suggestions that may help...

    -do you have to continue to pump at work? is it something you could do away with?

    - what if you made a couple big meals on the weekends, freeze them, & heat them up throughout the week so you arent cooking during the week.

    -are you co-sleeping since LO is still waking at night? this may help you get more rest??

    thats all i could come up with. GL and pls know that you are doing a great job!

    Happily engaged to my best friend , Matthew
    1st time mama to Lucianna Dene' 3/29/08
    Exclusively and for 12 weeks and counting!!
    We discovered that we LOVE !

    Birth: 8 lbs 11 oz 21 in
    2 mo: 10 lbs 11 oz 23 in

    **first in my family to bf!**

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2007

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    You are SOOOOOOOOOOOO not alone! I feel the same way most of the time. Parenting and working has been so much more exhausting and difficult than I ever imagined it would be. I knew I'd be tired, but wow...

    I assume your lo is eating well during the day? With DD that sometimes helps a little - but usually she just wakes because she wants the cuddling and nursing - not because she's hungry...

    I agree with pp - is there a specific reason you're still pumping at work? I know I felt relieved when I gave up the pump - my day isn't quite as long as yours, but it was pretty easy for me to drop the pumping session...

    Congrats on bf for 21 months while working!!! WOW - huge accomplishment!
    Kerry - first time mom to Isabella Grace 3/2/07

    Still nursing at 16 months, working, and trying to balance my life!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Oh FFS!

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    Am there and doing that!! K is 22 months and we're still nursing too. The Dr. Jay Gordon method worked for us with some modifications. I've had to readjust a few times depending on what's going on in the house but it does take some perseverance.

    I understand, totally! There are days (today) when I can barely keep my eyes open. You are not alone, trust me! Let me know if you need some pointers on anything and I'd be happy to share my experience with you.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Durham, NC

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    I'm there too! DS will be two in a little over a week. Sometimes it feels like just being in a blur. When I remember to, I try to just take some time to relax. Also, DH is pretty helpful if I ask nicely (which can be hard after a long day). Have you talked with dh about this? Would he be willing to try to step it up a little bit to give you a mini break? Or... how about a mini-vacation for your family - a long weekend away perhaps? Sounds like you need some R&R.

    DS wakes still 3-5 times/night and I'm pumping once at lunchtime. I may try to cut out the pumping in a few weeks or so. I have read that many moms do that w/o issue with older nurslings. Of course, you'd have to drop a minute or two each session and then sooner or later you'd be done. If you feel like that would be something you are interested in when you are ready, keep it in mind. Several moms on the forum still have good bf relationships and don't pump anymore.

    you're not alone!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Really struggling...


    I completely understand!! I just got over being sick (again) and was very worried that I just can't handle it all. The biggest thing that helps me is keeping things as simple and routine as possible. We eat many of the same meals every single week (nachos or burritos, stir fry, roasted chicken, pasta, frozen pot pies) so that we don't have to think about it very much. And if my LO didn't have food allergies we would be enjoying even more takeout than we are. In the winter the slow cooker was my pal since I could prep at odd times or the weekend and then set it up in the morning.

    I am sorry it is so hard right now. Is it an exceptionally busy time at work or just average?

    I noticed that as my DS got older I started giving myself less slack and expecting myself to perform at a very high level in all areas of my life. Sometimes when I am busy at work I just can't have a lovely house, a variety of nutritious meals, a happy LO, and look really great all at the same time. Sigh.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2007

    Default Re: Really struggling...

    Thanks so much for all your advice. Since LO still drinks his milk during the day am hesitatant to drop the pumping, if he wasn't drinking it that would be an easy decision. Sigh.... Good idea to make some meals over the weekend just never seem to find the time, but maybe I can give it a go.

    Just your words of encouragement help me to keep going. Thanks mammas! Work just seems to be hectic all the time and no matter how much I plan, things never seem to pan out the way I planned.

    But your words of encouragement and knowing that I am not alone really helps. Maybe I shoudl rethink the Dr Jay Gordan method again and see if there is a way I can modify it to suit our needs....


    Mother to Zayne 19/8/06 2.56kg

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