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Thread: New and needing advice

  1. #1
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    Unhappy New and needing advice

    Hi there,

    I am a first time mom to a four week old baby boy. We are having some bf difficulties and I was hoping I could get some suggestions.

    First I have to say, ds does not like to be manipulated. He hates being pulled onto the breast, having his hands held down away from his mouth, etc. He is a fighter and is strong too! I have had to take a more laid back approach to letting him find his own way onto the breast, but that is causing problems, too:

    Sometimes, when trying to latch, my ds shakes his head from side to side with his mouth over my nipple, but will not want to latch on. Why is this happening? Other times when he is in the middle of eating, he will pull his head back with my nipple still in his mouth. Ouch! Is he trying to get more milk?

    I'm sure these issues are causing a poor latch or the little guy not latching at all. If you have any advice or experienced any of these things, I would really appreciate hearing from you!!

    Thanks,
    Marie

  2. #2
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    as for the latch- my dd did the same thing when we started. she was rooting but couldn't feel my nipple on the roof of her mouth so she couldn't latch on- i have flat nipples. i finally started using ice to get them to stick out further so she could find them. now we have no problems. dd also did the pulling thing. i don't know why she did it, but i felt like i was her chew toy! i remember comparing it to what my dog does when she chews her bone! maybe others will have some better advice, but i do know what you are going though- been there! good luck!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    hi there -

    i'm a first time mom, too....to a 10 week old baby girl. i had a rough start to breastfeeding, but things have improved.

    during feedings, my baby will also pull her head back with my nipple still in her mouth...and yes, it does hurt! i typically nurse her in the side-lying position, so i've started to put my arm behind her head (the arm that i'm laying on). it sometimes refrains her from pulling her head back...and even if she is able to pull her head back, she can't pull her head back too far because of my arm. i don't know why she does this either because after she does it, she continues to nurse.

    as for latching, my baby sometimes seems to have a difficult time latching. i try to help her by gently bringing her to my breast (e.g., hand behind her head and pull her into me). this typically gets her latched on.

    good luck!...and congratulations!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    Quote Originally Posted by Aleina's_Mom
    during feedings, my baby will also pull her head back with my nipple still in her mouth...and yes, it does hurt! i typically nurse her in the side-lying position, so i've started to put my arm behind her head (the arm that i'm laying on). it sometimes refrains her from pulling her head back...and even if she is able to pull her head back, she can't pull her head back too far because of my arm. i don't know why she does this either because after she does it, she continues to nurse.

    as for latching, my baby sometimes seems to have a difficult time latching. i try to help her by gently bringing her to my breast (e.g., hand behind her head and pull her into me). this typically gets her latched on.
    From my own experience I want to share what I learned about getting your baby latched/posotioned correctly. NEVER push your baby's head into your breast.

    When the Back of the Baby’s Head is Held
    to Attach the Baby to the Breast


    Your hand should support the base of your baby's head and your fingers shouldn't touch your baby's cheeks or press on the back of your baby's head. This is very important since babies have a reflex that causes them to push back, which can mess up your latch and if continued cause the baby distress which could lead baby to have an aversion to nursing (see part of my experiences with this HERE).

    La Leche League's article on latch/positioning,
    The Mother-Baby Dance: Positioning and Latch-On says:
    "It is important not to touch the top or back of the newborn's head because it is very sensitive after birth. When the head is touched the baby may have a tendency to pull back from mother's breast rather than move in toward the nipple. This may be the reason why some mothers have trouble getting the baby to latch on. They try to force the baby onto the breast by firmly holding the back of baby's head which causes baby to arch away from mother's breast."

    I wish I would have known this at the beginning, as it could have possibly saved my baby girl and me months of problems and heartache. Good luck to you all!

    Mama to Adeline Brett, breastfed for 4.5 years (12/14/05) and little Eliza June, new tiny sprite in my arms and still learning the ropes (7/18/10)

    Family Blog • If I'm here I'm nursing and typing one handed ... forgive the typos!
    And I'm not a newbie at all ... I'm trying to get my old user ID working from back in the day ... paint-the-moon

  5. #5
    kristenco's Avatar
    kristenco is offline Shares Widely And Frequently
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    Quote Originally Posted by adriansmama
    Sometimes, when trying to latch, my ds shakes his head from side to side with his mouth over my nipple, but will not want to latch on. Why is this happening? Other times when he is in the middle of eating, he will pull his head back with my nipple still in his mouth. Ouch! Is he trying to get more milk?
    This is the baby's way of trying to stimulate your nipple to make it harder. I have flat (soft) nipples, and this was always a problem with my second born, because I used pacifiers with him, so he knwe there were harder, easier to latch on to nipples out there - mine just wasn't one of them! By the time he was 4 months old, the only way I could get him to stop the shaking his head back and forth, and actually take the nipple, was to slip my finger in his mouth WITH the nipple, then pull it out quickly once he was latched on - good grief! I haven't used a pacifier this time, and my DS never tries to stimulate the nipple - just accepts it as it is.

    Do you find that when you're breasts are fuller, the baby latches on quicker? Having full breasts is the only thing that makes my nipples hard. (Much to my husband's dissapointment - ha!)

  6. #6
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    Quote Originally Posted by adriansmama
    Hi there,

    I am a first time mom to a four week old baby boy. We are having some bf difficulties and I was hoping I could get some suggestions.

    First I have to say, ds does not like to be manipulated. He hates being pulled onto the breast, having his hands held down away from his mouth, etc. He is a fighter and is strong too! I have had to take a more laid back approach to letting him find his own way onto the breast, but that is causing problems, too:

    Sometimes, when trying to latch, my ds shakes his head from side to side with his mouth over my nipple, but will not want to latch on. Why is this happening? Other times when he is in the middle of eating, he will pull his head back with my nipple still in his mouth. Ouch! Is he trying to get more milk?

    I'm sure these issues are causing a poor latch or the little guy not latching at all. If you have any advice or experienced any of these things, I would really appreciate hearing from you!!

    Thanks,
    Marie
    I also had this happening with ds. I also had an issue with not being able to supply enough bm when he had a growth spurt. At that point, with my doctor's okay, I began giving him 4oz. of formula to supplement just before bedtime. I'm still doing that now and bf all day and at night if he wakes. Usually, though, he sleeps all night now(he's 3months). At some point I wondered if it was all worthwhile. But now I don't want to give up bf. There is nothing like that bonding time and that look in his eyes while he eats. I'm so glad I was able to ride out the hard times and had the support of my husband and doctor.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    Does you son like to be swaddled? My girls are ten months and for a while and still sometimes I swaddle them to feed them. They don't mind as long as they have the boob! That will keep his hands out of his mouth.

  8. #8
    Join Date
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    Default Re: New and needing advice

    Does you son like to be swaddled? My girls are ten months and for a while and still sometimes I swaddle them to feed them. They don't mind as long as they have the boob! That will keep his hands out of the way.

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