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Thread: im really tired

  1. #1
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    Nov 2007
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    Default im really tired

    My son is 21 months, and has been nursing every 2 hours or less(seriously) since 4 months old. I am exhausted. I think I may have chronic fatigue syndrome. my body always feels sore like I have the flu. I sometimes enjoy the daytime nursing. I can barely deal with the nighttime nursing. We co-sleep away from husband. If I say no to nursing, he gets very angry. I am afraid to say no at night because in the past he has gotten so upset, that he wakes up completely, and it is 2 hours before we get back to sleep. I am stuck in a vicious cycle. I don't know how to correct it. I fantasize about 4 solid hours of sleep. I imagine leaving my family so that i can go sleep in a hotel. I am a huge fan of breastfeeding, but I am completely spent. My husband has had a lot of stress at work, so he can't give me more than a friday and saturday night, and I am not sure we could accomplish anything in that short of time. The baby naps regularly, 2 hours every afternoon, and goes to sleep between 8 and 10, and wakes up between 7 and 8. However, he nurses every 1.5 to 2 hours during that time. I have tried the pantley pull-off, but it doesn't keep him from waking up again and again.

    I feel guilty about wanting to quit,and I don't even know how to do it, but i am so, so, tired. Any words of advice out there? I know this too shall pass, and he won't be this little forever, but my 10 year old nursed until 2 1/2, and it wasn't this difficult.
    help!!!!!!!

  2. #2
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    Dec 2006
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    Default Re: im really tired

    I hear you, we have a similar situation with my 16.5 month old son. I am waiting for his teething (molars!) to be over and then I'll try the Dr. Jay Gordon method. Have you tried it? Here is the link:
    http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp

  3. #3
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    Default Re: im really tired

    I totally forgot about his method. I have printed it out a couple of times, but it seemed too difficult at the time. i think i will have to revisit it, as i don't think i can be any more tired than i already am! thanks!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: im really tired

    I know how you feel. At your son's age, my son was still nursing CONSTANTLY around the clock. He generally woke up 10-12 times (sometimes more) at night to nurse. My son was a little older than yours (close to 2 1/2) when I finally decided to night wean, but here is what I did. First I made him a book about night and day (e.g. daytime is for eating, playing, nursing; nighttime is for sleeping) and put pictures of him in it doing different activities. It went through his bedtime routine, and then said that mommy and the "nursies" need to go to sleep at night too. If the nursies are sleeping, mommy can rub DS's back to help him go back to sleep. It ended with morning time and him nursing again.

    We read the book every night before bed for awhile and talked about it. Then, I picked a time period (like the Jay Gordon method but I started with only a couple hours) and would tell him the nursies were sleeping if he woke up within that time. I gradually expanded the time until finally the nursies went to sleep right after his bedtime nursing and didn't wake up until the sun came up. We did have some crying, but not as much as I thought. I definitely think it helped to have talked about it a lot during waking hours, so he understood more what was going on.

    Good luck!

  5. #5
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    Mar 2007
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    Default Re: im really tired

    hi, we´re in very much the same situation with my 18 month old daughter, and like you, I'm just too tired to try anything at night. The way I manage until she's a bit older so I can try something like the story book one of the pp mentioned (great idea!), is by going to bed when she does around 8 or 9, and napping when she does (can you do that?). Also, I don´t roll over during the night to change sides, I lie on the same side and feed her from both breasts, that way I minimise disruptions and can fall back to sleep more quickly. If you´re suffering from chronic fatigue you need to look after yourself, maybe have somebody else help with little one during the day so you can catch up on sleep? also, are you eating well? maybe a B complex supplement helps?
    take care and I hope you feel a bit better soon

  6. #6
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    Default Re: im really tired

    Reading your post, I am more worried about your health than the weaning. Are you eating a really nutritious diet?

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
    Dental issues? Find out how to Cure Tooth Decay.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: im really tired

    llmommy-That is a really good idea. I think I will start working on the book. Thanks!
    Last edited by becksmom; December 2nd, 2007 at 09:41 PM. Reason: wanted to personalize it

  8. #8
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    Default Re: im really tired

    Quote Originally Posted by healthymama View Post
    Reading your post, I am more worried about your health than the weaning. Are you eating a really nutritious diet?
    No, I am probably not. I have seen a nutritionist, and have supplements to take, but I don't take them. I am overwhelmed all the time, and taking care of myself has definitely been last on the list. Like I said, I feel stuck in a vicious cycle. I would take better care of myself if i had more sleep, and if I had more sleep I would be able to take better care of myself. Somethings gotta give, I know. Thanks for your concern!
    Last edited by becksmom; December 2nd, 2007 at 09:46 PM. Reason: spelling

  9. #9
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    Default Re: im really tired

    Quote Originally Posted by ferchi View Post
    hi, we´re in very much the same situation with my 18 month old daughter, and like you, I'm just too tired to try anything at night. The way I manage until she's a bit older so I can try something like the story book one of the pp mentioned (great idea!), is by going to bed when she does around 8 or 9, and napping when she does (can you do that?). Also, I don´t roll over during the night to change sides, I lie on the same side and feed her from both breasts, that way I minimise disruptions and can fall back to sleep more quickly. If you´re suffering from chronic fatigue you need to look after yourself, maybe have somebody else help with little one during the day so you can catch up on sleep? also, are you eating well? maybe a B complex supplement helps?
    take care and I hope you feel a bit better soon
    I do try to get to sleep early, and my mom helps once a week. As for the staying on one side, i wish i could, but my boobs just will NOT cooperate! The switching sides is ridiculous, and the initial sucking grates on my nerves, and he insists on tickling my arms with both hands!!!! So, each time he nurses, can be extremely irritating when you are groggy! Thanks for your help!

  10. #10
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    Default Re: im really tired

    Quote Originally Posted by becksmom View Post
    No, I am probably not. I have seen a nutritionist, and have supplements to take, but I don't take them. I am overwhelmed all the time, and taking care of myself has definitely been last on the list. Like I said, I feel stuck in a vicious cycle. I would take better care of myself if i had more sleep, and if I had more sleep I would be able to take better care of myself. Somethings gotta give, I know. Thanks for your concern!
    I would start with a really good quality cod liver oil supplement (Carlson's is a good brand). Might help with the sleep issue. Also make sure the room is completely dark. That will help you increase melatonin production and get your sleep cycles back in shape. Eating well can make all the difference in the world. Please try to take care of yourself.

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
    Dental issues? Find out how to Cure Tooth Decay.

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