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Thread: Will she hate me

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    53

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    You girls are right it is my decision. They will see how happy-healthy we are and mabey they will to except it

  2. #12
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,262

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    If you are ready to wean, I think you've gotten some good advice on how to go about it.

    But if you love nursing and don't want to stop, and your husband is supportive, I see no reason to let your family's discomfort force you to wean your baby at 12 months. I really believe that there is a time in every mother's life (and father's life) when they have to stand up to grandma and grandpa (or brother/sister, aunty/uncle, etc.) and say "Okay, you parented your children your way. Now it's my turn to parent my child my way." You have to establish your boundaries as a parent or your family will walk all over you. (I'm not trying to make a snide comment about your family in particular- this applies to all families!)

    I see two possible approaches if you decide not to wean:
    1. Don't tell them what you're doing. Unless they're with you every second of the day, they probably won't know what you and your baby are up to.
    2. Tell your family the truth and try to educate them. Here are some resources to get you started:
    - Article from the journal Pediatrics on nutritional content of breastmilk in mothers who have been nursing for more than 1 year. Debunks the myth that breastmilk has "no nutritional value" after a baby turns one.
    - Article from Mothering Magazine on benefits of breastfeeding past one year.
    - Rather technical article from American Scientist on food allergies, and how breastfeeding helps develop the immune system and prevent food allergies.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    great post momma1.

    You have to do what you feal is best, as baby gets older most just assume that they are weaned anyways.
    And it becomes something that you do in priviate between you and toddler.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    Ditto momma1,

    I was going to suggest the same thing. When my daughter reached about 14mths I realised that I had stopped telling people that I was still BFing. I never actually lied but I would go out of my way to change the subject or not disagree with their assumptions that I had stopped. I nursed until my daughter was 2 but as it was only usually morning and evening (and during the day if we were home), no one really knew. When we were out she was usually too busy to worry about a feed.

    This time around I am determined to be loud and proud!!!! I really regret not being more open about our breast feeding relationship. For extended nursing to become more acceptable and "normal" in our society the more open we need to be. Easier said than done.

    My plan this time (fingers crossed we get to at least 2 yrs) is to arm myself with as much knowledge on nursing toddlers as I can (as momma1 said). My aim is to have a few inarguable, impressive and heartwarming "one liners" that will stop any doubt that what I'm doing is the BEST thing for my baby. Well......thats the plan anyway (any ideas).

    Good luck with what you decide, but I did find it easy first time around to keep our nursing between my daughter, my husband and I.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    great plan by the way!

  6. #16
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Will she hate me

    awww, thanks Andrea

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