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Thread: Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    3

    Question Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

    Hello. First-time poster, looking for feedback and advice. I am mommy to a six year-old son and identical twin girls who will be 3 next month. I breastfed my son exclusively until he was a year old, but was not nearly so successful with my twins. Although I had LOTS of milk in the beginning, my girls and I faced a lot of challenges with BFing: they were six weeks premature, emergency C-section that left me "stoned" for days after birth, NICU nurses/docs told us we needed to supplement Bmilk with formula to help the girls gain weight, etc. Long story short, by the time I returned to work when my girls were 4 months old, my milk supply had dwindled to almost nothing. We did not know how to wean them away from the formula and bottles, and every time I tried to get help, everyone told me I had done a "great job" giving my girls even some breast milk, but that with twins it was just "too hard" and I should "let it go." I made an appointment with a lactation consultant, and she told me the same thing (I later found out she was just a regular nurse, not a lactation specialist). I tried to build up my milk supply on my own with herbs and marathon pumping, but just as I began seeing good results, I got the flu for several weeks, and it was like a death knell for my milk supply. I reluctantly gave up.

    Fast forward to today. My girls are healthy and beautiful, but I have always felt a sense of loss and sadness that we did not bond the same way my son and I had. Also, I worry that they will not be as healthy/smart/etc. as my son, since they only got partial Bmilk feedings, and only for a few months. My husband and pediatrician think I am silly, b/c our girls are so healthy and it's just guilt on my part. But I still feel this way. I am thinking of trying to induce lactation with herbal remedies and pumping, so I can give my girls Bmilk in a cup. I don't think I am ready to start BFing again when they are this age; I fully support women who BF as long as they can, but to start over BFing at their age is probably not for me. Am I crazy for thinking of doing this? Has anyone else tried it? I should note that I work FT, another obstacle... All advice, support, thoughts welcome. Thank you so much.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    46

    Default Re: Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

    First of all hugs!

    I just wanted to let you know you are in good company here. Everyone is so supportive. My story is somewhere here way back in the boards from last year. I too had issues and bad advice when DD was born. I ended up bottle feeding. When she was 6 months old I came to this website and found information about relactation. I was able to relactate to 8 oz per day. At the time I put it in DD's bottle for one feeding per day. Every drop counts!

    It is hard. I pumped every 2 hours and did power pumping at night after DD was in bed, I woke up once per night to pump again. I also work full time but I work at home. I'm sure you can get a break to the bathroom to pump for 10-15 min. I mean your smoking co-workers sneak off several times a day right ;-) No offense to smokers!

    It is hard and you need to take lots of herbs etc. I found good information at Dr. Jack Newan's website (google it). He has a handouts section that tells you what to take. I really found that renting a hospital grade pump and domperidone really increased output.

    However after two months I reached only 8 oz and I could not keep up with the pace. I will tell you, it is time consuming and will take over every free moment you have. I think it was worth it for the few months DD got my milk (she actually started turning up her nose at formula), but in the end with a full time job and an active lifestyle I could not keep up.

    I just wanted you to know my experience and just know I totally know what guilt you are going through.

    By the way, my DD is VERY smart and she only had a small amount of breastmilk so it doesn't make them smarter or dumber!

    Good luck!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    3

    Default Re: Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

    Thank you to sarahboosmom! And hugs to you, too. Wow, GREAT effort getting up to 8 oz! If I had the frame of mind to search for the right information back when my twins were under six months, I might be telling a very different story... but I wasn't getting a lot of sleep back then, as you can imagine.

    I will check out the website you suggested and think long and hard. I know I should not compare my son's development to my twins', but I still do. He seemed to be so far ahead of them at the same age, and I often wonder if it is because he had SO much more Bmilk. I try to take comfort in the fact that my girls got what I would classify as a fair amount of Bmilk along with their formula for the first four months, but not a really good amount. But as you indicated, every little bit helps!

    I'm sure my husband will think I am crazy -- our lives are so busy already, and taking on one more thing will certainly be a huge challenge. Anyway, thanks so much again, it's just nice to hear about others' experiences as I think about making this decision.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    98

    Default Re: Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

    my dd who is two only bf for about 2 or 3 months. i didnt have much support. my dh tried but didnt/doesnt understand. he does now luckily. i was also selfish wanting a beer which at first i said this will be the only time. and it was more and more frequent. but we also had latch issues wouldnt latch on at all. then i got a pump which kept breaking got a new one and dog chewed it up yikes. but anyway now with ds i feel soooo guilty that i couldnt bf her for a year +. i myself was thinking to give her bm in a cup but its hard to find time to pump to give to her since ds eats every 2hrs. now im rambling. i just wanted to share my story and let you know your not alone.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    3

    Default Re: Mom of toddler twins - thinking of inducing

    Hey lesdrunk,

    I have not been on the board for a few days, but wanted to touch base and thank you for your post. For some reason, it is always easier for me to give support and empathy to others than to myself! But when I hear that you were able to give your daughter BMilk for even two months, I think that is really great. So many babies don't even get that. I am really trying to hold on to the fact that "every bit helps" ... because I truly believe that it does. For me, it was the insecurity about bonding with my twins as much as about the health benefits. I have made an extra effort over the last couple of weeks to make "special time" for each of them -- one on one. That can be challenging with three little ones, but even five minutes makes a difference.

    I have about decided that I probably won't attempt relactation/inducing. With that in mind, I am going to channel all that energy into really strengthening my mother/child relationship with my twins and my son. We are already very close, but can always be even better!

    Hugs to you! Don't worry. Your dd knows you love her just as much as you love your ds! In a few days/weeks/months, you might find you have the energy/time to pump a little, and you can always send a little BMilk her way if you choose. If not, she is still going to do just fine. Now, take that sad face off your signature and replace it with a happy one -- you deserve it for giving your daughter and son a good start on life! Best wishes -- twins+one

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