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Thread: nightweaning and co-sleeping

  1. #1
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    Default nightweaning and co-sleeping

    Is it possible to nightwean and still co-sleep? I'm thinking about nightweaning but will remain to co-sleep so she doesn't lose both at the same time.
    Jenn SAHM and carseat to

    DD 5 years old , nursed till just shy of 3 yrs old



  2. #2
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    Dr. Jay Gordon is supposed to be a way to nightwean and co-sleep.

    http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/ap/sleep.asp
    Dana
    Wife to Jonathan Edward, 3/29/2002
    Mother of Alexander "Lex" Edward, 3/4/2007
    Attachment Parenting - it's not what you do, it's why you do it.
    Breastfeeding
    Co-Sleeping
    Wearing Lex as often as possible
    Daytime cloth diaperer, nighttime sposie user

  3. #3
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    Please let me know if you find a way, try it and it works for you. I haven't really tried any thing because it seems to me that it would be hard to sleep on the floor of the bakery every night and not get hungry. But I have started bringing a sippy cup of water with us and if I just can't take anymore offer water instead or water at the end of a feeding to get him off me.
    I would be very interested in hearing about how this method actually works for people.

    Way too lazy for formula

  4. #4
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    Shelly it has worked for us - the Dr. Jay Gordon method (my modified version of it anyway). I didn't play it hard and fast with the timelines. I just followed her cues. But was now (for the most part) go to bed at 8:30 or 9pm the last nursing's at 9 and resume at 4:30am, with the last nursing happening at 5:45am or so before I get up at 6 to get ready for work.

    I started the process when she was 17/18mos or so. Even if she starts out in her room and comes in as usual, she goes back to sleep without nursing. She still wakes up once but usually a snuggle will put her back to sleep.

    The sippy of water worked but it was heartbreaking in the beginning...she would fall asleep clutching it, and basically pinned to my side.. That lasted 3 nights and that was that. HTH.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
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    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  5. #5
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    It worked for me, I totally weaned and we still co-sleep. We just cuddle close now. Here is what I did..I copied it from another post I did. The Dr J gordon method is good, we tried it before and it almost worked, them I had to work a lot, and my supply dropped, so I started night nursing again to keep up my supply. Anyway....

    As for my method, I think it was more that my lo was ready. My lo has so many food allergies, that the thought of her having one more and me doing without the only thing left she wasnt' allergic to was hard. So, I took a week off work to spend with her, and work on weaning. That way she knew I still loved her.

    Day 1- Nursed first thing in morning. Then, I started by cutting out all daytime feedings (she still nursed to sleep for her 2 naps a day) Yes, it made naps few and far in-between, but I knew it had to be done. Thus she only takes one nap a day now - I get her to sleep by rubbing her ears- she really likes it and it relaxes her. You just have to get them still and quite and find something that relaxes them for naps and bedtime. I nursed her to sleep that night and only once during the night (she was a big night time nurser- every 3 hours still).

    Day 2- No daytime or morning nursing until bedtime again. This night, I didn't let her nurse anymore until morning. I just cuddled/ kissed her. She didn't put up too much fight.

    Day 3- No nursing in moring or all day. Nursed for 10 minutes that night, but made sure she went to sleep without the breast in her mouth.

    Day 4- No nursing at all....at bedtime, she whinned for about 5 minutes and them fell asleep without the breast...for the first night ever in her life. I was going to wait 10 minutes and then let her have it, but she didnt need it.

    We havent nursed since. She hasn't even really asked. I keep a bra on when we bathe just to remind her. It went so fast and easy. I had tried night weaning before and it didnt work, but I guess she was just ready this time. I hope this helps some of you.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    Quote Originally Posted by mothersky View Post
    Shelly it has worked for us - the Dr. Jay Gordon method (my modified version of it anyway). I didn't play it hard and fast with the timelines. I just followed her cues. But was now (for the most part) go to bed at 8:30 or 9pm the last nursing's at 9 and resume at 4:30am, with the last nursing happening at 5:45am or so before I get up at 6 to get ready for work.

    I started the process when she was 17/18mos or so. Even if she starts out in her room and comes in as usual, she goes back to sleep without nursing. She still wakes up once but usually a snuggle will put her back to sleep.

    The sippy of water worked but it was heartbreaking in the beginning...she would fall asleep clutching it, and basically pinned to my side.. That lasted 3 nights and that was that. HTH.
    My experience with Mark was pretty similar. And it was way better than my experiencing night-weaning my first when I tried to end co-sleeping and night nursing at the same time. That wasn't pretty.
    Laura, proud vbacing, ecological breastfeeding mommy to four ages 8, 6, 5, and 2. That's Kate nursing her doll, Adam.

    The Seven Standards of ecological breastfeeding: (1) exclusive breasfeeding for the first 6 months (2) pacify baby at your breast (3) don't use bottles and pacifiers (4) co-sleep for night feedings (5) take a nursing nap (6) nurse frequently day and night; avoiding schedules (7) avoid practices that restrict nursing or separates you from your baby. The average return of menstruation for ecological breastfeeding mothers is between 14 and 15 months.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    My sister night-weaned her daughter like 2 months ago, she is currently 20 months old, they are still co-sleeping...HTH

    Proud Mother to Ziyad, born naturally, November 3 2006

    Breastfed for 26 months and still co-sleeping
    .
    "Do more than belong, participate. Do more than care, help.

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  8. #8
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    I was trying to night wean and end co-sleeping at the same time. That didn't last more than a night. Then we tried keeping the night nursings while keeping her in her crib. That didn't work either. Neither of us were getting any sleep. So this past week I tried night weaning her while we still co-slept. That finally did the trick. She still nursed before bed, but when she woke up for her regular 2am feeding, I gave her water instead. Told her no booboo (her word for nursing), gave her a hug and kiss and just turned my back. She did cry and fuss for a little while, but then she just cuddled close to me and fell back asleep. She was up again at four and we repeated the process. After three nights of doing the same thing, she finally slept through the night without nursing. I was able to get seven straight hours of sleep, the longest sleep ever since two years ago. Last night she did ask to nurse again around 2am, but she didn't fuss very much and quickly went back to sleep. I think giving her the water helps, because most times she is just a little thirsty.
    HTH. Good Luck!

  9. #9
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    I believe that it is all up to each individual childs needs but that it is also a learned response. When I added a mattress next to my bed it slowed down the nursing at night and she started sleeping the night but not consistantly. The distance between us limited the automatic response from Me and her to nurse back to sleep during night wakings. I am a single Mom so I don't have the option for her to sleep next to someone else. Maybe rearranging where the baby sleeps in the bed will help.

    I ended up moving her mattress into her own room which she loved but she still woke most nights and I would go in there and say no nursing until the sun came up. Well my daughter has a very strong will and would wait up at night for hours waiting for Mr. Sunshine to come up, so she could nurse again. This went on for months and months! The only way for me to wean her at night without a fuss came recently when I had to tell her she couldn't come in my bed anymore at night and I wasn't going to hers. Now she sleeps the night maybe 7 out of 10 days and if she wakes she can quietly come in my room and lay on the mattress I have prepared for on the floor next to my bed.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: nightweaning and co-sleeping

    It's totally possible! For us, it worked that she was old enough (around 2 I think; it's funny how one forgets these things..) to understand something about the concept of time. I explained to her, many times, I'm going to nurse you when the sun comes up, but I'm not going to nurse you when its dark. And I repeated the idea when she woke in the night. I'd pat her, hold her, offer water if she wanted a drink, but not nurse. Tried it at least twice; first time, when she was maybe around 18 months, it didn't work; then tried again a few months later, and it was relatively easy; a few rough nights, and then she got used to the new regime. We're still co-sleeping (she's 3 and a half now); she still nurses in the morning, but sleeps through the night; it's been that way for ages now. So, go for it; it's possible!

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