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Thread: Can't keep up

  1. #11
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    I agree he is being overfed. You should talk to your DCPs about strategies to making the milk you pump last through the day. You can also try an even slower flow nipple, like the Breastflow. It really helped us when this was happening at about 5 months.

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/bottle-feeding.html

    Babies should be bottlefed:

    For 10-20 minutes at a time, to mimic the usual breastfeeding experience. Care providers should be encouraged to make appropriate quantities last the average length of a feeding, rather than trying to feed as much as they can in as short a time as possible. This time element is significant because the infant's system needs time to recognize satiety, long before the stomach has a chance to get over-filled.

    Consistent with a breastfed rhythm; the caregiver should encourage frequent pauses while the baby drinks from the bottle to mimic the breastfeeding mother's let-down patterns. This discourages the baby from guzzling the bottle and can mitigate nipple confusion or preference.
    Another tip that I read was to make sure that the caregivers hold the baby often when not feeding, so that the LO doesn't associate being held with being fed every time. They may cry to be fed just for the attention if they aren't being held enough.

    I would definitely try to find a way to get him off of the formula. If he's reacting to it, there may be a danger it could cause allergies or other problems for him long term. I know it is so difficult and confusing. I would encourage you to poke around www.kellymom.com. It saved my BF relationship with DD when we went through the exact same situation. Hang in there!!

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
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  2. #12
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    By the way, my name is Leila too! How do you pronounce it?

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
    Dental issues? Find out how to Cure Tooth Decay.

  3. #13
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Quote Originally Posted by healthymama View Post
    By the way, my name is Leila too! How do you pronounce it?
    Thanks for the advice. All of this just solidifies all those guilt feeling about leaving him at daycare. I know he isn't getting held to his liking. I see how they work in there: feed, change, put in swing, grab next baby, repeat....

    And my real name isn't Leila, I just like it.

  4. #14
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ's Mom View Post
    I think he should be six months to introduce solids...I I am impressed by how much you are pumping and it leads me to believe that your child IS a big eater. However, I thing you should still push back to the DCP that they shouold be feeding him smaller amounts more often. I think they may be feeding him every time he fusses. He may just want to be picked up, played with, carried around. I think that 20-22oz really should be enough. Especially considering how much is being consumed while together.
    I have a feeling he is a big eater, too, otherwise I wouldn't be able to pump so much, right? And he is a good boy, only really fusses when he's hungry. So, I dunno, but the girls there make comments all the time about his eating and lack of napping. I think he may be a bit high needs for them.

    I think if they would wear him it would make all the difference. He loves

  5. #15
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    That's so cute you like the name. How did you hear about it? How is the one you like pronounced? Mine is LEE-lah.

    Anyhoo, yeah, it totally sucks. I can soooo relate (as far as guilty feelings). Can you find a better daycare? Shuffle your schedule for less hours at daycare, or condense your workweek into 4 days? Nurse at lunchtime?

    We couldn't find a satisfactory daycare when we first looked for one. So, we decided on a nanny/babysitter. It is expensive and takes some major gymnastics with the schedule (since we can afford only a small number of hours per week). My mom takes DD 1 1/2 days, DH does early mornings and afternoons before I get home, and I work a 4 day work week, plus I come home at lunch. It's a lot of juggling, but is very much worth it.

    You are doing the best you can. Just keep following your mommy intuition and you will find a solution that works for everyone.

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
    Dental issues? Find out how to Cure Tooth Decay.

  6. #16
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Quote Originally Posted by Leila View Post
    Thanks for the advice. All of this just solidifies all those guilt feeling about leaving him at daycare. I know he isn't getting held to his liking. I see how they work in there: feed, change, put in swing, grab next baby, repeat....

    And my real name isn't Leila, I just like it.
    I am not trying to make you feel guilty at all. I am hoping that if your hear this enough and see other research that reflects what you see here, you will be able to confidently and FIRMLY tell your daycare provider "NO. He doesn't need more to eat. He needs to eat less more often and be held and interacted with more. MY son only eats 40oz at the outside MOST in a 24hour period when we are together. There is NO WAY that he needs 25oz of that while he is here for 8-10hours." The end. Daycare works for YOU. Their job is to take care of your child to your liking and do what you tell them. Tell them not to over feed your son. You CAN keep up. You ARE keeping up. Make them utilize your liquid gold correctly.

    Way too lazy for formula

  7. #17
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Quote Originally Posted by healthymama View Post
    That's so cute you like the name. How did you hear about it? How is the one you like pronounced? Mine is LEE-lah.

    Anyhoo, yeah, it totally sucks. I can soooo relate (as far as guilty feelings). Can you find a better daycare? Shuffle your schedule for less hours at daycare, or condense your workweek into 4 days? Nurse at lunchtime?

    We couldn't find a satisfactory daycare when we first looked for one. So, we decided on a nanny/babysitter. It is expensive and takes some major gymnastics with the schedule (since we can afford only a small number of hours per week). My mom takes DD 1 1/2 days, DH does early mornings and afternoons before I get home, and I work a 4 day work week, plus I come home at lunch. It's a lot of juggling, but is very much worth it.

    You are doing the best you can. Just keep following your mommy intuition and you will find a solution that works for everyone.
    You'll laugh, but that show Futurama, the character's name is Leila, but I think it was spelled Leela (pronounced like your name) in the show...I just thought it was pretty.

    It will get better in April, my work schedule changes then, and I'll be home on Mon and Tues, so he will only go to daycare 3 days a week. Well, 2.5 actually, cause on Fridays I go in late, so he won't go there until around noon. I'll be working weekends, but he can be home with Daddy, which makes me feel so much better. I could probably go ahead and start that schedule if I had to, but it wouldn't make my boss very happy. Just a few more weeks, I keep telling myself...

    I wish we could juggle things around, but we each have a 30 min drive to work, I go south and he goes north, we live at the halfway point. So going home at lunch isn't an option. Unless I found a closer DCP, but my work is in a VERY rural area (a state park), so finding a quality DCP there is probably impossible.

    I just need a BF-knowledgeable, baby-wearing nanny/sitter who can give him all the love and attention he needs. *wishful thinking*

  8. #18
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ's Mom View Post
    I am not trying to make you feel guilty at all. I am hoping that if your hear this enough and see other research that reflects what you see here, you will be able to confidently and FIRMLY tell your daycare provider "NO. He doesn't need more to eat. He needs to eat less more often and be held and interacted with more. MY son only eats 40oz at the outside MOST in a 24hour period when we are together. There is NO WAY that he needs 25oz of that while he is here for 8-10hours." The end. Daycare works for YOU. Their job is to take care of your child to your liking and do what you tell them. Tell them not to over feed your son. You CAN keep up. You ARE keeping up. Make them utilize your liquid gold correctly.
    I know you aren't trying to make me feel guilty, I have done that on my own since the day I signed him up there. I admit though when I read your post I chuckled a little, cause I tried to imagine their faces when I'd have to tell them to feed him less MORE OFTEN. I think their heads might explode! They already go on and on about how often he eats, which really isn't that bad when I look at his sheet, he's eating every 1.5-2 hours.

    But you are right and I will have to have a talk with them. I wonder too if he is comfort sucking, but because its a bottle and not the breast, he can't turn off the liquid, so to speak, and ends up guzzling too much. If that's the case, you'd think he'd take a paci, but he won't. When you try to give him one, he looks real indignant as if to say, "What is THIS? How DARE you give me a fake one!!!"

  9. #19
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Okay, we're still having the same issue. I talked more with my DCP and they say they try to hold him off to see if he's just bored, they've tried the paci, but he still seems hungry and acts ravenous when he eats. One feeding today he took 6.5 oz!

    I've worked so hard so I can pump and send 25 oz to DC with him, and they still end up having to give him 3 oz of formula each day!

    When we are at home he doesn't eat that much and definitely sleeps more (today at DC he only slept 20 min).

    I'm not sure what to do, I can pump anymore, my doc says introduce solids but I don't want to until 6 mo. Is this a separation thing? Distractions? I don't know where he puts it all!

  10. #20
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    Feb 2008
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    Default Re: Can't keep up

    Maybe don't ask them to go cold-turkey - ok, so now he takes a 6.5 oz bottle. Next time, ask them to give him a 5 oz bottle and see how that works. Then a 4 oz.

    That's how my friend night-weaned her baby - she fed him EBM bottles, less and less each time, and eventually he stopped waking for feeding.

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